Incredibly wonderful (in every way) PILs have kindly paid for a villa next April for a big family holiday, sunny climate, pool etc. There will be two of them (late 70s), us (2 adults, 2 small children) and SIL and husband (2 adults, 2 slightly older children).
Christmas has reminded us just how incredible lazy and entitled my SIL and her husband are, and now we are absolutely dreading our family holiday.
I desperately need to learn some coping mechanisms for it, I'm not one to usually not saying anything but to do so will 100% cause a family fall out and upset my lovely PILs. I also very much value fairness and find it hard to overlook the inbalance.
Things they do (last family holiday 5 years ago): dont lift a finger to help clean up after 3 meals a day, turn up empty handed whilst we all bring food/drink, complain how tired they are all the time like noone else is ever tired, expect to be waited on hand and foot, think the world revolves around what their 2 kids want to do, dont chip into any ongoing family shops, dont cook any meals. PILs are so giving, they will jump and go and help or do things for them, go to shops to fetch things for them - and then we jump in to save tired PIL from having to do it, which causes a lot of resentment from my end. PIL won't say anything. We are only going as it means so much to PIL. Husband is on exactly the same page as me and finds it very hard.
The Christmas guest thread has made me realise there's loads of entitled people out there, and lots of family members putting up with it and not saying anything, and I'm very interested to hear how others would handle this situation.
AIBU: Keep schtum, dont say anything and put resentment aside for family trip, which has been so kindly gifted. If so please give me tips/similar stories to get me through it.
AINBU: Something absolutely has to be said, even if it will cause tension and upset to PILs.