To wonder why I put myself through the awfulness of having a toddler again?

My 15 month old is driving me to the brink of insanity, he whines from the moment he wakes up to the moment he goes to bed. He’s angry at the world and don’t we know it! He looks like an angel and gives lovely cuddles when he’s not trying to break my glasses or pull his brothers hair out, otherwise he’d be in the bin!

DS7 was never this difficult or if he was, I’ve forgotten it and I am also struggling with doing it again, I’ve been in tears several times in the last week

What comes after 7? Just wondering 😬

Since birth DD has hit every milestone such as fussy newborn, teething issues, sleep regressions, terrible twos etc. On this forum it seems some had kids that skipped some parts all together. Not on my watch. We have without fail, hit every one of them and stayed there for what seems an age. DD is 3 now. I love her so much but this is one frazzled mum.

Hang in there OP, mine were both lovely easy babies but awful,awful, toddlers but have been an absolute delight as teens. Youngest is now 18 and they’re fantastic company.
I’d happily never speak to a child under 7 ever agin though! 😂

My second pulled me into a false sense of security as he was delight until he was 3. Then omg

If that isn’t something you want to hear me say

It has no effect whatsoever on me or my life what you say. But I have seen many women complaining about toddler years because they expected to live their normal life, and somehow slotting a quiet toddler in it.

I just found that when you ignore people's advice, "kids do as they're told", and you plan your life around the toddler, everyday, your holidays etc.., then you have a much more pleasant time.

Also that days are never a single event and a single emotion. You can have a lovely time at a Christmas place like Lapland, but sitll have a tantrum about putting the shoes you tell them to put before you go, a moan because they wanted to try mulled wine in the place (and reasonably you said hell no), and you hoping they would sleep early because they had a busy day, means you resent them for being up instead of just going with the flow.

And when toddler is in a "refusing to eat anything", just buy ready-meals. If they're not going to eat them anyway, no point wasting your time cooking. And keep trying picky bits plates etc... so they finally bloody eat SOMETHING!

then you realise you haven’t actually done anything for you, I haven’t watched any TV that isn’t kids this festive period. Like I say small thing but hard.

that's being a parent?

You can't do things "for you" but you can do things together. It might mean having a hairdresser coming to your house instead of visiting a salon, it might mean putting them in a buggy and jog with them, or going to a "toddler friendly" sport club (there are many) or get your workout from a soft play 😂
Can't go to a restaurant? Many places do offer take-away, you can still enjoy the same diner with friends, but at home.

but it's very possible to be alone with a child with no support, and still get a lot of stuff done.

I have preferred each age to the last so far. My 6yo is much more fun than she was stropping as a 2 yo 😁

I was rather smug about mine as it wasn't so much the terrible twos but the tricky twos. It had it's moments but wasn't too bad.

Then we hit 3 and dear jesus...

It was too late. I was already pregnant with the next, no turning back.

Luckily after about 6months we turned a bit of a corner but the boy was so close to going out the window. (I adore him but god).

I am relishing the baby stage this time round. I remember finding it so hard first time round but I'm really enjoying it now knowing what doom awaits this weary traveller.

@whydidiputmyselfthroughit as a mummy of way older kids , teens and 3 of them, I hear you !! I found the toddler stage v v v hard work . Newborns were a walk in the park in comparison. And I didn’t have easy newborns at all but they stayed in the one place , napped a bit and didn’t need constant interaction or control . What age are you? I’m very late 30’s with teens and prob hormones are kicking off . Most of my friends have small babies and are all “can’t wait, it must be so much easier from 4…. 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Possibly the 18 month regression? My second dc had this bad. @Plubbler

I'm away with my 18 month old right now and he's driving me absolutely demented, whinge whinge whinge and relentlessly following me about. Not content with anything.

Terrible 2's"
Turbulent 3's
Fuck it 4's
Firey 5's
Stubborn 6's
Sweet 7's (phew)

Before being parent I was just expecting the terrible twos! Different ages, different stages! 🫣

the one thing I can think about is your life becomes toddler- centred. It's relentless, and you have no me-time. I think that's what a lot of people struggle, they can't just sit down and watch tv or scroll their phone for hours, they can't have their nails done, it's just non-stop.

But if you are out all day or most of the day, give them something to do - like the bottom cupboard full of tupperwear so they can empty that when you make diner for example and let them be for the little time you are in the house, it's really not bad.

They also learn to say no, so that's quite amusing 😂

It's tiring , and some people can't accept that it's not the time of your life to have long leisurely meals with friends and families etc.

DS was a lovely toddler. There's another thread today about a six year old. DS was a horrible 6 year old.

I don't think you escape it. You just get different problems at a different age.

Maybe you are getting it all over and done with now.

We are thinking of having another, can you remind me of why we shouldn't - what exactly is going on with said toddler? My others are mid primary school age so I have completely forgotten..

Kid dependant. My eldest was an absolutely relentless toddler, ran full tilt at danger, scaled everything, walked at 9 months old. My youngest I was prepared for the same again and got a wee girl who anted to sit and colour while holding my hand, wanted to go to toddler bookbug and the library. She would play independently with her dollhouse and happily litter at the park or go a long walk in the pram. You may have particularly relentless toddlers. My eldest age 4-5 was the worst time as he was emotionally very heightened. t 7 he's such a wonderful chap, still very high energy but very kind and interesting and loving.

You get what you get and you get through the rough bits is what I'm saying, it does get better and if I could be delivered a well adjusted 2 yr old I'd have a third but mine both didn't sleep at all as babies and I couldn't do the first 2 years agaib. Give me relentless tantrums over sleepless newborns.

The nostalgia has kicked in HARD for me this year though I suspect as hormones shift towards menopause

One of the main reasons I am child free is because I couldn’t deal with toddlers. I love babies up to about 18 months old and then I don’t mind kids 8+ but young children drive me mad.

I agree with you. I was never really a fan of the baby or toddler stage,with my DD and my DGD (now 19). I found the years from about 5 years upwards much easier and more enjoyable. I enjoyed the teenage years even more,but I suppose I was lucky in that neither of them were troublesome teens!