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Original poster

Inappropriate present, hideous bookends and me in drag!!!!

514 replies

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 14:53

I love christmas, and I love christmas presents, I got my best friend a lovely calendar showing photos that were precious to me throughout the year of all the good times we have shared, in return, and this is so strange, I got two bookends, which have obviously been handmade, but look like my face, but in a grotesque punch and judy way, I'm not sure whether they are supposed to look so scary, but they are hideous, I actually had nightmares about them last night, and on top of that, a smaller 3D figurine which is basically me looking like a drag queen in hideous blonde hair and a massive red bow, they obviously took a long time and I get that, but I wonder what they are trying to tell me, they have sent me a message asking what I think of them and I really don't know what to say, to be honest, Im quite upset they see me that way. Im just a normal person who loves christmas, I was hoping for tickets to see a christmas carol or something like that.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
LoopyLeela · 26/12/2025 22:44

All I want for Christmas is to see these bookends

mathanxiety · 26/12/2025 22:41

What gifts did you exchange with this friend last year, OP?

What was the price range?
Were the gifts like the calendar you sent this year? Or more extravagant like theatre tickets?
Any jokey gifts?

What I'm getting at is why you read "Tickets to the show" into the conversation you had, and why you think the bookends are not merely evidence of being very bad at art?

Howmanycatsistoomany · 26/12/2025 22:39

Rubyupbeat · 26/12/2025 21:57

Just pay them the 300 quid, return the bookends and end the friendship, you all seem extremely odd and awkward and should not mix together.

This. Inviting them out for a meal and not having the means to pay was a piss take on your part OP. Send them a bank draft or hand them the cash when you return the bookends and whatever the fuck the thing with the bow is supposed to be.
And your brother's a twat.

BlackCat14 · 26/12/2025 22:39

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 15:57

yes but the bill for the meal I took them out for was £300 which is about the same as the tickets, although, obviously, they ended up paying, its such a mess now and I feel I have lost a good friend, and no they did not order them, they look homemade, my friend works with computers and has 3D printers

I’m sorry but are you for real?

You “took them out” for a meal, encouraged them to get as much as they want, including £40 wine, and then every single card of yours bounced, so they ended up paying, AND YOU HAVENT YET TRANSFERRED THEM THEIR MONEY BACK? Also why werent
your cards working? Did you have no money in your account? Or was there just a card error?

And to top it off, for Christmas you got them a photo calendar made, costing what, £30? But you expected them to buy you £300 tickets for a Carol concert?! Am I reading this right?

forgetfullarkspur · 26/12/2025 22:35

GhostsJulianforPrimeMinister · 26/12/2025 22:30

I can’t get over offering to take her for a meal but not having the funds to pay for it.

@GhostsJulianforPrimeMinister

Completely unrelated to the thread but your username is excellent!

Kittenwatch · 26/12/2025 22:33

GhostsJulianforPrimeMinister · 26/12/2025 22:30

I can’t get over offering to take her for a meal but not having the funds to pay for it.

Same. Mad.

Kittenwatch · 26/12/2025 22:33

This is one of the strangest threads I’ve read in a while.

GhostsJulianforPrimeMinister · 26/12/2025 22:30

I can’t get over offering to take her for a meal but not having the funds to pay for it.

Manxexile · 26/12/2025 22:11

"... I got my best friend a lovely calendar showing photos that were precious to me throughout the year of all the good times we have shared,..."

Personally I think this on its own is sufficient to explain the bookends and the figurine. No need to look at the restaurant faux pas.

Grrrzelda · 26/12/2025 22:09

Even if you don't want to acknowledge witchcraft, there is clearly ill intent. Get rid of objects, pay back 'friends', block 'friends' and no further contact or explanation.

PleaseStopEatingMyStuff · 26/12/2025 22:05

I'm not surprised you're confused. I'm also very confused for you. I hope you will consider posting a picture of the bookends. It might help other us to decide if she was intentionally taking the piss out of you or perhaps trying to be artistic but failing miserably. The bust isn't great but could perhaps just be shit art.
Your brother sounds like a bully. He's part of the problem. And I would have paid that bill back straight away, but I suppose that's done now if your friendship is badly damaged anyway.

Jane143 · 26/12/2025 22:04

I think they are quite clever if homemade! Anyone arty would be pleased

Rubyupbeat · 26/12/2025 21:57

Just pay them the 300 quid, return the bookends and end the friendship, you all seem extremely odd and awkward and should not mix together.

IMissTheLittleBluePackets · 26/12/2025 21:52

Bigboldfont · 26/12/2025 20:56

OP, are you in fact a transwoman?

This is a good question.

Yourlifeinyourhands · 26/12/2025 21:52

This whole thing is weird! You let them pay £300 for a meal without even giving half back, you got them a calendar which would cost you what about £10 and then expected £300 theatre tickets?! Why they sent you those I have no idea but none of it make sense!!

3luckystars · 26/12/2025 21:51

You could have split the bill over a few cards or at least paid some of it!

Stucknstoopit · 26/12/2025 21:26

Metalplate · 26/12/2025 19:31

This is absolutely awful and bullying of you at a distance, your support network and family uniting in ridiculing you and having the video forever.

Can you talk to any of your family or friends about the bullying? The video and your reaction needs to be deleted.

I would send the following to your brother and friends:
I am deeply upset and humiliated at presents sent they have made me confused, anxious, upset and scared. If that was their aim - they succeeded. Undoubtedly this was also the aim of videoed and sending my reaction despite me begging those involved not to do. My humiliation in 2025 is complete - whatever I did to deserve this for this mammoth personal cruelty I can only apologise as I would never wish current feeling I have over this entire horrid episode to ever be felt by another human being. I’m not emotional or sensitive and the cruelty displayed by everyone and my ridicule, embarrassment and the endless mirth caused to all of you, I believe reflects on you. Your lack of empathy, your planning and execution was complete. I wish you all the best in 2026 but it won’t be with ‘family’ and ‘friends’ like you at my side.

please go NC with the lot of them and my God I feel your pain - I shouldn’t be saying ‘get therapy’ ‘get counselling as you did not cause this - they all did and truth be told they are are the ones that need it. But you need counselling to form a plan to go NC, to make good positive new friendships both within your family and out of it - for example no way my husband would film me and send a video of my distressed reaction to others - if he didn’t know what was happening he might have filmed it and then deleted it wrapped me up and then he himself go with the people that asked him to film it but he would never of sent it.

So I actually feel you have been putting up with abuse on different levels for years and 2026 is the year to draw a line on the sand. Never ever contact those ex friends again - block on everything 2026 and going NC is hard but you deserve better friends and there are plenty of decent friends out there waiting to meet you!!

Edited
Show quote history

@confusedgoldilocks whatever you do please don’t send this message as suggested (below).
if they are bullying and gaslighting you then this message will just add fuel to their fire.
make an effort to pay the money back that you owe for the meal you promised and then if you truly believe they made this things to upset you then you are within your rights to end the friendship.

myhaggisblewup · 26/12/2025 21:25

PuppyKeep · 26/12/2025 20:20

We need to see the bookends, or they don’t exist. I bet they’re not even that bad.

Look at OP's posts, photo is there.

Moonlightdust · 26/12/2025 21:22

LaddersAndLadders · 26/12/2025 21:18

I love the look of this. I think it's quirky not horrible. The pupils give it a slightly scarier look but slightly softened would make them look so much better. (Edited to remove bookend word)

Edited

That is not the bookends - the photo is the smaller figurine which accompanied them which is bad enough but OP stated the bookends were truly grotesque and couldn’t bring herself to post them.

Thalia31 · 26/12/2025 21:22

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 15:48

its really not funny, how would you like it if your best friend made bookmarks that made you look like a bug eyed witch with a slight goatee, when they had let you to believe they were gifting you christmas carol tickets at the old vic, as I said, i know i messed up with the bill but there is no need to be so personal, its downright hurtful and very cruel

This post and your follow up comments are beyond bizarre. Op are you autistic??

reversingdumptruckwithnotyreson · 26/12/2025 21:20

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 16:20

because once i sent a photo of me and i had a big red bow in my blonde hair, its based on that photo

If they’re making fun of a photo you sent then it doesn’t sound like they’re good friends.

I don’t understand why you assumed you’d be gifted expensive tickets?

Stigsmother · 26/12/2025 21:18

I do so hope your friends are on Mumsnet, if by some massive miracle this is true I'm sure they will be along soon to clear the whole debacle up.
PS. pay them back !!!

LaddersAndLadders · 26/12/2025 21:18

I love the look of this. I think it's quirky not horrible. The pupils give it a slightly scarier look but slightly softened would make them look so much better. (Edited to remove bookend word)

DreamTheMoors · 26/12/2025 21:04

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 15:17

They do have a partner, and I have met them, we all went out for dinner just before christmas, and it seemed fine, although I think I may have embarrassed them, I offered to pay and we all ordered quite a lot with quite a lot of drink which I encouraged as I was paying, but then my card got declined, well, I say my card, I ended up trying a few, as you do, and in the end my dear friend paid and refused to let me pay, so I thought it was all sorted but maybe they are trying to tell me something, its quite confusing because the book ends really are quite scary versions of me, maybe I should send them the money for the bill, as they refuse to take it in person.

You have a choice, as I see it:
#1
Tell her the truth, that you think her gift was bizarre, was mocking you and you’re not sure why. That you think it might be tied to that one dinner when your card was declined, but you aren’t sure. Ask if she truly is mocking you.

#2
Tell her you ABSOLUTELY LOVE THEM and how did she know you’d love something as quirky as these bookends? Then laugh heartily and let it go.

Because it depends on your friendship, I think.

Moonlightdust · 26/12/2025 21:03

The photo the OP posted is NOT the bookends but the figurine that accompanied them. The bookends resembled grotesque Punch & Judy style characters with a hooked nose, boggly eyes & a goatee and the figure like a man in drag but all appeared to be distorted versions of the OP.