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Original poster

Inappropriate present, hideous bookends and me in drag!!!!

514 replies

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 14:53

I love christmas, and I love christmas presents, I got my best friend a lovely calendar showing photos that were precious to me throughout the year of all the good times we have shared, in return, and this is so strange, I got two bookends, which have obviously been handmade, but look like my face, but in a grotesque punch and judy way, I'm not sure whether they are supposed to look so scary, but they are hideous, I actually had nightmares about them last night, and on top of that, a smaller 3D figurine which is basically me looking like a drag queen in hideous blonde hair and a massive red bow, they obviously took a long time and I get that, but I wonder what they are trying to tell me, they have sent me a message asking what I think of them and I really don't know what to say, to be honest, Im quite upset they see me that way. Im just a normal person who loves christmas, I was hoping for tickets to see a christmas carol or something like that.

OP posts:
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8
Ariel896 · 27/12/2025 07:54

Pieceofpurplesky · 26/12/2025 15:55

How do you know they are supposed to be of you? I would hate a cheap calendar of photos - did you include one of the meal you couldn't afford to treat them too?

This thread is absolutely amazing!!!!! 😂 but this comment wins hands down. Please say you included pics of the meal you didn’t pay for!!!

PoliteRaven · 27/12/2025 07:27

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 07:18

If the OP couldn't afford the bill at the time why do people think she can now ?
And if they are good friends who know her well , surely they have some idea of her financial status?.
All of her cards declined ( she tried several ," as you do") this wasn't a new experience for her.
I bet her " friends" knew the meal price was out of her range .
Who chooses wine at £40 a bottle when someone else is offering to pay?

Edited

This.

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 07:18

If the OP couldn't afford the bill at the time why do people think she can now ?
And if they are good friends who know her well , surely they have some idea of her financial status?.
All of her cards declined ( she tried several ," as you do") this wasn't a new experience for her.
I bet her " friends" knew the meal price was out of her range .
Who chooses wine at £40 a bottle when someone else is offering to pay?

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 07:15

I keep thinking about the OP. .
I wonder if she's ,awkward , naive,rather downtrodden.i can't find the right words.
But it sounds like it came easily to both her brother and this couple to make fun of her..
It sounds as though she was very grateful for the moments spent with them over the last year ; it does seem slightly odd to immortalise these in a calendar.
I'm thinking there's a huge difference in how much disposable income the OP has and how much her " friend" has . That in the past they have given presents that they could afford but which outmatched those of the OP.
That the OP had become used to expecting these.
I think the OP was naive/,unworldly over the meal.
I think her friends and her brother are cruel and making fun of her.

Blizzardofleaves · 27/12/2025 07:14

The gifts were intended as a joke, not done maliciously, hence the capturing it on video. I imagine it was just a bit of fun, and highlights how insensitive the friend can be to OP’s insecurities.

If op is genuinely hurt and upset she should discuss with her friend how it made her feel.

I am not sure why she hasn’t paid for the bill yet. Send half - £150. You shouldn’t be paying for the entire bill. If you think she has been deliberately cruel, then you are free to end the friendship.

They were definitely hinting for you to buy tickets for them, hence the generous presents!

Isittimeformynapyet · 27/12/2025 07:06

BlackCat14 · 26/12/2025 22:39

I’m sorry but are you for real?

You “took them out” for a meal, encouraged them to get as much as they want, including £40 wine, and then every single card of yours bounced, so they ended up paying, AND YOU HAVENT YET TRANSFERRED THEM THEIR MONEY BACK? Also why werent
your cards working? Did you have no money in your account? Or was there just a card error?

And to top it off, for Christmas you got them a photo calendar made, costing what, £30? But you expected them to buy you £300 tickets for a Carol concert?! Am I reading this right?

Show quote history

No. The OP says the tickets were for A Christmas Carol "or something" at the Old Vic theatre which would suggest it was a play based on the story by Charles Dickens. Or something.

HerNeighbourTotoro · 27/12/2025 06:47

mondaytosunday · 26/12/2025 16:32

Yea I go to the trouble of making bookends and a figurine in my own quirky style just to let you know I think you are… what? Cheap? Mean? Ugly?
Or could It be that your friend loves you but has different taste and thinks these things look great (have to say I think the image looked charming not at all scary)! I think you are reading WAY too much into this. And frankly if someone said they’d take me out to dinner, didn’t in the end so I had to pay, I’m not sure I’d be giving them a present at all!

Tbh reading how the friend had a lot of fun at OPs expense, I started dounting it was a present done in good faith, sounds very cruel.

clamshell24 · 27/12/2025 06:01

Hooked nose you say- are the bookends meant to be Scrooge?

SomewhatAnnoyed · 27/12/2025 05:44

Shodan · 26/12/2025 16:11

Is it possible- and this is probably a massive leap- that the bookends are actually not caricatures of you, but of Ebeneezer Scrooge, from A Christmas Carol? And that's why they wanted to see your reaction?

Regardless- it was beyond crass of you to play the gracious host at the restaurant and then not have the means to pay for it, and even worse to be expecting an expensive gift like theatre tickets from the same people that you stiffed.

I think this is likely to be it and would explain why they asked for it to be filmed as it was a double joke - that OP was a Scrooge over the meal and that they’d already referenced a Christmas carol to her.

That’s being kind to them tho, but it is a likely scenario

Farticus101 · 27/12/2025 05:41

DetectiveDouche · 26/12/2025 23:51

To put it very plainly OP, you need to pay them the money for the meal. Dust off your cheque book and send a cheque if you have to but you need to do this. You don't "treat someone" and them force them to pay the cost themselves. And they were forced because someone had to pay it.

Regarding the bookends, if you can't discuss this with them then you weren't as close at you think. Best friends would not be wanting to hurt you.

As a secondary issue, perhaps you could look at getting some help with budgeting as it's a little worrying to be so unaware of what you can and can't afford that you are having multiple cards declined. Kindly, is there something else going on?

Absolutely spot on.

Bleachedjeans · 27/12/2025 05:38

In answer to the question ‘what do you think of your presents?’ simply reply ‘I don’t know what to think’
maybe not easy for you though…

NoArmaniNoPunani · 27/12/2025 05:23

How did the situation come up where you were offering to pay for dinner? Most friends would just split the bill.

HappyNYx · 27/12/2025 04:42

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 15:55

it actually gets worse because they knew i would be at my brothers on christmas day so they asked my brother to film it on his mobile phone and send it to them when I opened them, i was horror struck as I removed the wrapper, but my family thought it was hilarious, I begged my brother not to send it but he did, and my face is a real picture, Im shocked and confused, but everyone else is laughing, and now my friend has just rang, they have it on their tv screen and everyone is laughing there as well, as they are at a family do, I've been turned into a figure of fun for someone elses amusement so no, I dont feel like paying for the meal now,

Based on this alone, I would be reconsidering the friendship. The fact they've put your reaction on the TV screen at theirs for their families to see too is bullying.

I wouldn't even respond to them now. Just cut them off your life. Go no contact.

I'm also wondering why on earth your brother sent them the photo of you opening it too when you quite clearly asked him not to.

Wheresthebeach · 27/12/2025 02:47

Pay for the meal pronto.
Don’t expect expensive presents from people - that’s absurd and you’ve created that in your head. Can’t imagine why…it’s just silly of you.
Clearly they think this is hilarious, as does your brother. Bin the gift and distance yourself from the friendship. Whatever else is going on the gift is hideous and meant to be.

reversingdumptruckwithnotyreson · 27/12/2025 02:35

IridiumSky · 27/12/2025 00:28

Found it! 😂

Can’t lie I’d put those away too

mmsnets · 27/12/2025 01:48

BlondeBonBon · 26/12/2025 23:12

Regardless if you want to pay for the meal or not, pay half the bill for the meal as it’s the fair thing to do.

afterwards be honest with your friend. Tell her that something is only truly funny if both parties find it funny .. and in-fact you feel really hurt by the Xmas gifts, you feel made fun of, which is unexpected and unkind.

offering to pay for a meal and then not paying is not funny!

mmsnets · 27/12/2025 01:45

transfer the money otherwise youre a CF!

maybe that was your intention

TheseWordsAreMine · 27/12/2025 01:43

I'm in shock.

Calliopespa · 27/12/2025 01:37

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 16:20

because once i sent a photo of me and i had a big red bow in my blonde hair, its based on that photo

OK I've now caught up with your more recent posts, including the photo it is based on and the mobile filming and I'm sorry the only interpretation that makes sense is that they are making fun of you.

Bin the items, pay them for the meal so you owe nothing and cut contact. I'd probably tell them why.

Calliopespa · 27/12/2025 01:28

I once heard a comment made to the effect that if we all saw ourselves the way others see us, we would be deeply depressed. It is possible she sees the bookends as a likeness and didn't mean them to be unkind. That isn't to say they are a good likeness, but we all see things differently.

andthat · 27/12/2025 01:09

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 15:45

If it had not been for the bookmarks, yes that would have been fine, but I have a hook nose, weird eyes and if I look closely, Im sure I can see a goatee, its so hurtful, it just makes me want to burst into tears, I dont think they could have make me look so ugly and horrible,

@confusedgoldilocks you describe the gift giver as your best friend. Take a step back and think… would your best friend really want to humiliate you this way? If the answer is ‘yes’, then I’m not sure why she is your best friend.

if the answer is ‘no’ then you have to assume that she thought it was a fun and quirky gift and no malice intended. Which is it??

As for the meal.. you offered to pay as a present . It sounds like you couldn’t afford to. But that doesn’t mean you shoud have let your friend pay and nit make any effort to pay back.. even if half. You should make amends for that.

Grrrzelda · 27/12/2025 01:04

It may sound pre-Enlightenment to you, but witchcraft happens @UneAnneeSansLumiere

Namechangerage · 27/12/2025 01:03

Why didn’t you just split the meal? Why did you still expect them to buy you tickets when all you got them was a calendar and they paid !£300! for a meal? So confused… though the book end is hilarious 🤣

Isittimeformynapyet · 27/12/2025 00:52

@DahlsChickenz Vettriano was a painter. He didn't do sculptures.

UneAnneeSansLumiere · 27/12/2025 00:50

I have to say that this is one of the best threads I've read on here. It's just so deliciously outre.