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Original poster

Inappropriate present, hideous bookends and me in drag!!!!

514 replies

confusedgoldilocks · 26/12/2025 14:53

I love christmas, and I love christmas presents, I got my best friend a lovely calendar showing photos that were precious to me throughout the year of all the good times we have shared, in return, and this is so strange, I got two bookends, which have obviously been handmade, but look like my face, but in a grotesque punch and judy way, I'm not sure whether they are supposed to look so scary, but they are hideous, I actually had nightmares about them last night, and on top of that, a smaller 3D figurine which is basically me looking like a drag queen in hideous blonde hair and a massive red bow, they obviously took a long time and I get that, but I wonder what they are trying to tell me, they have sent me a message asking what I think of them and I really don't know what to say, to be honest, Im quite upset they see me that way. Im just a normal person who loves christmas, I was hoping for tickets to see a christmas carol or something like that.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
Sammy900 · 27/12/2025 11:09

Have they given everyone a toby jug-style book end of themselves?...they might be finding it all hilarious putting pics through the 3D printer and seeing how the caricatures turn out

Reddressobsessed · 27/12/2025 11:08

I'm almost certain I have read this exact story before on mumsnet? With the same photo posted. Anyone else have deja vu?

Followthatpath · 27/12/2025 11:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

NormasArse · 27/12/2025 10:52

Seriously- you are being really odd about this.

You said you would pay, then they had to pay because you had no money?

The book end is fantastic, but you clearly lack a sense of humour.

Ariel896 · 27/12/2025 10:24

Please come back OP! This thread is helping my hangover

Princessbananahamock · 27/12/2025 09:55

I think it was a jokey present. If you had just gone out for a meal b4 Christmas I really feel that the bookends had already been done. I have a 3d printer it takes effort to size things right to print, to create a print , and the print process can take sometimes days. It’s not something you could turn out in say a day! Plus the painting finishing . The bookends kind of seem to me like a caricature type thing.

dottiedodah · 27/12/2025 09:43

Maybe they are not very good at hand made stuff.I have gifts that wont see the light of day as well.I would reply that they are a bit of a laugh .and clear a nice space in the back of my drawer for them!

Scarfitwere · 27/12/2025 09:41

I feel like theres a lot of back story to this and maybe the OP has form for being a cheapskate/cf/pisstaker and is known for this in her friends and family circle. And this is a mean joke to get you back. It would explain asking the brother to film it.

BlackCat14 · 27/12/2025 09:40

This is before I even start on the logic of you then expecting really expensive theatre tickets when they were already so out of pocket, I just cannot get my head around this!

@Poutingtrout tnis is what is blowing my mind too! I cannot fathom how OP had this experience in the restaurant, admitted she knows it was highly embarassing for her friends, yet is still assuming they’ll buy her £300 concert tickets for Christmas, when all she’s got them is a £30 photo calendar (made up of HER fave pics, not the recipients!).

Poutingtrout · 27/12/2025 09:34

OP please can you come back and explain how it came about that you offered to pay for a meal out in the first place? It’s an extraordinarily generous thing to do and in my circle of friends and family has only happened a small handful of times eg a special birthday, and even then often the host has only done it because they have known that people who they really wanted to be there wouldn’t otherwise have had the means to attend. And if your finances are so tight that multiple cards were rejected on the night, why didn’t you check the prices before you offered this gift? This is before I even start on the logic of you then expecting really expensive theatre tickets when they were already so out of pocket, I just cannot get my head around this!

brunettemic · 27/12/2025 09:16

Your present to her is clearly all about you, maybe they’re trying to make a point in that it’s a bit grotesque.

Chiaseedling · 27/12/2025 09:14

Homegrownberries · 27/12/2025 00:45

Neither presents were good. A calendar of photos that are precious to you isn't great present for anyone other than you. Also, maybe she hates how she looks in those photos and maybe you've inadvertently done the same thing to her that she's done to you.

This is very true. I’d hate this calendar present as

  1. we use a family calendar on our phones - haven’t used a hanging one for years.
  2. I don’t particularly like looking at photos of me. Very picky what I put up in the house and on FB.
Tigerbalmshark · 27/12/2025 09:01

Isittimeformynapyet · 27/12/2025 07:06

No. The OP says the tickets were for A Christmas Carol "or something" at the Old Vic theatre which would suggest it was a play based on the story by Charles Dickens. Or something.

Show quote history

This is what she wanted tickets to.

www.oldvictheatre.com/?_gl=11jeij17_gcl_awR0NMLjE3NjY3NjQzMzkuRUFJYUlRb2JDaE1Jd09HYWc4N2JrUU1Wb1pGUUJoMVJ5UmJyRUFBWUFTQUFFZ0tkUlBEX0J3RQ.._gcl_au*OTgzNDA3NjQ2LjE3NjY3NjQzMzg.

Isittimeformynapyet · 27/12/2025 08:56

Blizzardofleaves · 27/12/2025 07:14

The gifts were intended as a joke, not done maliciously, hence the capturing it on video. I imagine it was just a bit of fun, and highlights how insensitive the friend can be to OP’s insecurities.

If op is genuinely hurt and upset she should discuss with her friend how it made her feel.

I am not sure why she hasn’t paid for the bill yet. Send half - £150. You shouldn’t be paying for the entire bill. If you think she has been deliberately cruel, then you are free to end the friendship.

They were definitely hinting for you to buy tickets for them, hence the generous presents!

Hence what generous presents?

What value have you placed on the unseen bookends and the worthless little bust of Bette Davis in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?

Alpacajigsaw · 27/12/2025 08:56

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 07:15

I keep thinking about the OP. .
I wonder if she's ,awkward , naive,rather downtrodden.i can't find the right words.
But it sounds like it came easily to both her brother and this couple to make fun of her..
It sounds as though she was very grateful for the moments spent with them over the last year ; it does seem slightly odd to immortalise these in a calendar.
I'm thinking there's a huge difference in how much disposable income the OP has and how much her " friend" has . That in the past they have given presents that they could afford but which outmatched those of the OP.
That the OP had become used to expecting these.
I think the OP was naive/,unworldly over the meal.
I think her friends and her brother are cruel and making fun of her.

This is a good point. I would wonder if even before the meal debacle whether the friend would have described OP as her best friend. Somehow I doubt it.

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 08:53

The OP shouldn't have offered to treat if she didn't have the money to pay for it!

She caused herself excruciating embarrassment by doing so .
I know many have jumped to the judgment of CF
but in my view this doesn't fit the bill ( no pun intended)
So she might have got a free meal out of it but at what cost to herself?
Most CF doesn't involve putting yourself into a hugely embarrassing situation.
The more I reflect the more I think the OP is vulnerable and being made fun of.
And it's perfectly possible to order decent wine for half that price when dining out.

Grrrzelda · 27/12/2025 08:45

UneAnneeSansLumiere · 27/12/2025 08:38

People may practice it, but it isn't real. Anyway I don't see what an ugly ornament has to do with witchcraft.

Show quote history

It is at the very least a sign of considered ill intent (maleficium).
Sorry you have missed out on folklore or even anthropology that would enable you to recognise the use of images. There are some good psychological clues to human behaviour.
Slán.

UneAnneeSansLumiere · 27/12/2025 08:40

limetrees32 · 27/12/2025 07:18

If the OP couldn't afford the bill at the time why do people think she can now ?
And if they are good friends who know her well , surely they have some idea of her financial status?.
All of her cards declined ( she tried several ," as you do") this wasn't a new experience for her.
I bet her " friends" knew the meal price was out of her range .
Who chooses wine at £40 a bottle when someone else is offering to pay?

Edited

£40 is not excessive for wine at a restaurant. The OP shouldn't have offered to treat if she didn't have the money to pay for it!

Chiaseedling · 27/12/2025 08:39

I’d be really annoyed re the meal scenario and you should 100% at last transfer for your half. Message and be polite about the gift, and say you’re so sorry re the meal - I’d like to transfer at least ‘our’ share, please send your bank details.

UneAnneeSansLumiere · 27/12/2025 08:38

Grrrzelda · 27/12/2025 01:04

It may sound pre-Enlightenment to you, but witchcraft happens @UneAnneeSansLumiere

Edited

People may practice it, but it isn't real. Anyway I don't see what an ugly ornament has to do with witchcraft.

Thedownwardspiralpath · 27/12/2025 08:37

IridiumSky · 27/12/2025 00:28

Found it! 😂

That’s a good shout actually 😃

It sounds like the OP bigged up a slap up meal for Christmas so she would get theatre tickets, knowing fully well she didn’t have the funds. I also suspect she has form for this and has already admitted to wanting a lifestyle she can’t afford.

Grrrzelda · 27/12/2025 08:35

Agree the OP sounds vulnerable. There are people for whom a £300 meal tab is normal but this 'friend' group does not sound like that. @confusedgoldilocks have you been asked to pay for things or do things you were not comfortable with before? Tale care of yourself.

MamsKnit · 27/12/2025 08:16

Where do you get things like those bookends made? I really want something like this.

MamsKnit · 27/12/2025 07:58

Isittimeformynapyet · 27/12/2025 07:06

No. The OP says the tickets were for A Christmas Carol "or something" at the Old Vic theatre which would suggest it was a play based on the story by Charles Dickens. Or something.

Show quote history

Yes it is the Old Vic’s annual Christmas show. It is very popular so tickets are expensive.

3luckystars · 27/12/2025 07:58

Were you just standing there trying to pay for the meal and hoping for the best? How did you not know what was in your accounts?
you could have split the bill over a few cards?

Why were you paying for meals out if you don’t even have £300 to your name? I’m wondering are you a bit vulnerable?

I hope you have decent people around you now. They don’t sound like friends and your brother isn’t nice either.