“Husband accused me of an affair” threads… not ATAAT but a question.

Not been heard yet. I’m still panicking about being cross examined…I talk very quickly and have been known to waffle

Hope you are OK, @Devoed. Sending a handhold.

Thinking of you @Devoed ! 💐🩵

I hope you were heard today, Devoed 💐

oh gosh. I saw this and remember your earlier threads. I’m so in awe of your tenacity and fight, even when it’s really rough. I’ve no advice but just wanted to add another voice the many supporting you.

I really hope the hearing goes smoothly for you @Devoed

@Mix56
really soon which is why I’m starting to panic

I hope that it all goes well for you. It must be such a stressful time … and that is what xh wants. I don’t have any advice as I have no experience with this (xh only wanted to argue about money, didn’t want to see the dcs!).

Just remember that this will all be over soon and it will all be a distant memory 🤞🏻

When is this being heard ? I feel so sorry for you having this strung out so long.

Pretty much, yes….ive listed a million reasons it isn’t in DC best interest. Nor have they said why it’s in DC best interest.

Solicitor said it’s good that it’s so ambiguous, better than being hell bent

Thats a real waste if time, is that what they are suggesting?

Their proposal is basically bouncing between homes two nights at a time.

I don’t know anyone whose children have their time split like that.

Completely understand you need to be wary at the moment, I was thinking more somewhere to see the support for you, rather than you sharing info. Totally appreciate this is your real life.
You can and will get there.

I am rooting for you too. I am sorry CAFCASS seem to be unhelpful with the schedule suggestion. Talking to your lawyer and making the reasons why this won't work crystal clear is definitely the right thing to do.

I’ll do that when it’s over and share everything on there.

Thank you xx

Really feel for you, you're doing brilliantly despite all the obstacles. Keep believing in yourself. Is there anyway you could start a new thread? I'm sure I'm one among many thinking of and rooting for you. The title would only need to mention KH, those of us that know, know.

I’m feeling very let down by CAFCASS again.

They wrote a second report, this was meant to be about our witness statements, but they’ve not mentioned the witness statements and have instead just talked through everything DC said to them.

Again, everything they have written is in line with what I’ve said but then they’ve thrown in a random schedule recommendation that doesn’t fit with what’s been said elsewhere in the report and without justification.

Obviously, I’ll have my barrister to question this but it does seem weird.

That’s it, it was a passing comment made to DC. His doorbell may have picked it up although I was on the road rather than the drive.

@Mix56
I couldn’t look wealthy if I tried 😂

My statement and evidence were long (within the limit), I imagine that means I am open to a lot more questions. I’ll revise it all this weekend with dates, etc.

I am just not sure what kind of questions they will ask.

Id say look tidy but not wealthy! You want the judge to believe you are not rich, the only salary provider in this former marriage, & now homeless because your loser H provided next to nothing & has refused you entry into the home you paid for.
So consider the image you are projecting

Wishing you the best of luck. Breathe deeply and think positively. If it's not too late don't share your witness statement until the last minute because he will use what you've written and counter argue against any of it.
This may go without saying but dress smart and show respect to everyone there (even him!). My ex turned up scruffy and shook his head at something the judge said. He also denied scientific evidence provided. It didn't go down well and in the last hearing he got roasted!

He can say you said “XYZ”. Who was there to confirm it ?
Anyone can potentially make false accusations.
The judge won’t want to hear “he said, she said.”
its not a good idea to get into minutiae, tit for tat, unless questioned on it. In which case you say
”This accusation is pure fabrication ” or “that is not what i said, he is exploiting a passing comment.”
Yes, put a pebble in your pocket…we are rooting for you.

Remember to breathe

Please believe in yourself. You've done so much and come so far. It is horrible for you that you have to face KH in court, but we all believe in you. Just stick to the facts, don't be afraid to ask for a moment if you need it, don't be afraid to clarify something if he has twisted it. We are all going to be right there in your pocket silently cheering you on. In fact, have you got something you could put in your pocket to hold onto when you feel panicky? Just to remind you that lots of people are supporting you and believe in you.

You are an incredibly strong woman, you will be able to speak. You’ve gone through hell and back and I think you’re awesome. You’ve kept your dignity throughout and can hold your head up high!! Remember, you’re just speaking the truth, there’s nothing more than that you can do. He has so many rabbit holes he can fall down due to the lies and fabrication that has been coming out of his stupid,
fat gob.

Your children are lucky to have you and I’ll be praying to all my goddesses for you.

Court is fast approaching and I’ve have persistent palpitations since yesterday afternoon. I just don’t know how I’m going to be able to speak in there.

KH has one thing “on” me which was a comment I made at pick up once, it’s not a bad thing but he’s exaggerated and twisted it obvs. I am sure I didn’t say what he says I did but now it’s sewn that seed of doubt.

Best of luck, @Devoed!