“Husband accused me of an affair” threads… not ATAAT but a question.

This is just the DRH rather than the final hearing, we’re a step closer but I’m just worried what that will look like.

“Cross”, (edit not working)

All Women’s Strength to you next week.
He will almost certainly get criss or make loud interruptions, let him hang himself.
You are Boadicea. Eyes ahead & fighting for your DC & fairness.

Steady yourself for the week ahead @Devoed . You've shown so much strength so far and you're almost at the end of KH's bullshit. The shaking inside you is your power bubbling up inside you not weakness. We're all rooting for you lovely, good luck x 💖

Take deep breathes, look into box breathing. I couldn't have managed court without it.
Write notes and/or doodle: sounds silly but while you're listening and not able to speak giving yourself the job of writing notes focuses your brains and helps you to manage the overwhelming feelings.
Have someone with you, not in the court but for the waiting room.
Have a plan for when you get home- easy dinner, film, easy night. Then once the kids are in bed you can tell your parents or go and journal.
Wishing you all the luck! Just remember you're doing all this for your kids, you're doing the right thing.

Wishing you the very best.

Thank you, it means a lot.

I just don’t know how I’m going to get through it, I just start shaking at the thought of it.

Another one rooting for you here. Try not to worry although I know that's easier said than done. He might have been semi credible at the start but he has shown his true colours since and not just to you. Stay calm and truthful and you'll be fine. Like all knob heads, when he fails to get the reaction they want they do eventually lose interest.

Also thinking of you @Devoed, you've got this!
Your ex knobhead couldn't be more obviously shite and you are clearly doing your best (which is more than good enough btw)!

Easier said than done I know, but don't waste your energy stressing beforehand.

You've got lots of us on here behind you. When you feel wobbly, take a few good, proper deep breaths, remember that we're all thinking of you, and carry on!
Yes, it's not right or fair, but you will get through it 🤗

So glad I found you.. Been following you and sending virtual support
Take care of yourself x

Same. Thinking of you.
Stay strong. Your kids need you to see him off.

Have also been thinking of you @Devoed, wishing you all the best

I have been thinking of you too. No help I know, but I am sending love and strength to you. You have done so well and achieved so much. Keep on keeping on. Not long to go now.

Will be thinking of you!!!!! He's ramping up because he is panicking, he doesn't have the control he wants. You're doing great, have everything crossed for you and the kids that it goes your way.

I don’t feel confident in the system which is causing me such anxiety. I’m exhausted.

They made is through Christmas, they said it was too long though. There was also a disparity in presents between DC and DSC.

Courts don’t seem to care about that sort of thing though. Very frustrating.

Hope it all goes well next week and the courts protect the DC from him.

It's understandable that you're feeling anxious Devoed but you actually sound fairly confident from what you've written.

I'm so sorry that you're having to deal with tears every time the children have to go to him, how did they cope with it over Christmas?

Of course you don't understand how he can treat the children so badly, as you're a normal, loving Mum, where he is clearly a head case, who only thinks of himself, and how he can hurt you. Don't worry, Karma will catch up with the bastard eventually!

Wishing you the very best of luck in Court next week, please come onto this thread and tell us how it goes. I'm sure I won't be the only one thinking of you.

Sending you a hug to give you courage.

@CunningLinguist2
Thank you…we’re in court next week, I’m very anxious.

I think my position statement is strong, and KH is hostile, his way or the highway and not child focussed. I feel it will go to final hearing, in fact, KH says it will if I don’t agree with him.

DC are feeling it now, we have tears every time they go. Not wailing, just talking as tears roll down their cheeks.

I do not understand how he can treat them like this.

I’m so so glad I found this. I’ve honestly been thinking about you all Christmas. Glad you’re ok x

@Devoed i was also worried and still want to follow your journey as i cannot wait until KH gets to court and the judge pulls his ‘stories’ apart and you get the peace you deserve… i just wanted to make you aware i can still view your original post (part 1) and previous part 2 just incase you wish to remove those also ???
Stay strong you are almost there ❤️🍀

Your only priority should be protecting yourself and your DC. If you think your tread was a risk then you were right to remove it.

I hope you can still get the support you need from here too.

@Devoed
I've never posted but followed your story since the start.

I'm really happy to hear that you're ok, I was also worrying a bit there 🤗

I can totally understand why you deleted your threads, but... I also get what others have said before about not letting it all get to you and not stressing about every last detail!

So, I suppose my message is: be sure that the choices you make are to suit yourself and your children.
That's easier said than done when you have to deal with a total knobhead, I think everyone understands that!

Just don't let him take too much of you away from you. We're not walking in your shoes, no, but we see how strong you are. Remember that when you are worrying about how he twists things.

If only half of what you have told us is true (and I believe you 100%) then has already dug himself enough of a hole 😉

Take good care of yourself and your peeps...remember to breathe (properly) and carry on being you (more than good enough from what I've read) 😘