Christmas expense split unfairly

Whatever is being purchased comes to £250. OP knows and chooses all of this (in fact in the OP does she even say she does the food shop with her sister?) so the £250 isn't the issue here, it's not a surprise to OP what has been purchased, or that she is expected to cover 1/3 of the bill as it is pre agreed that it covers 3 households for all of Christmas Day.

Post event, complaining that you're having to pay for the agreed portion of exactly what you were equally responsible for choosing and buying, because, for example, you didn't drink as much as you could have chosen too, seems off.

And if it's going to be at the level of wanting a more accurate split over the actual consumptions, then the sister should be entitled to nitpick over the cost of her utilities and cleaning and consumables...plus the value of her time and effort for the additional prepping and hosting.

Depending on where OP is location wise, she could always decline the invite from her sister and cook for just herself much cheaper than £83.33, or eat out. Here, a Christmas dinner, on Christmas Day, in a nice local restaurant, starts at £110, without drinks. Probably available for as little as £60 in some of the cheaper places but then potentially questionable quality.

I think if it was a £200 discrepancy to quibble, then it's worth the discussion. Over £20.80, when OP doesn't mention once that she's struggling for money, is it worth the upset it's likely to cause?

You should be able to take the leftovers if there is enough, but she did host and will have to wash all the dishes so probably doesn’t want to cook tomorrow

Of the £250 how much is alcohol?
I think this year it’s a bit too late to do anything but divide by 3 but maybe suggest when starting to discuss next years Xmas tgst you and your mum bring your own drinks so just good is split.
also it depends on whether there’s mountains of leftovers whether you suggest taking some home with you

Kind of all bases covered.

If OP is so integral to all the planning and prep and doing the actual shop, why pile such an excess of alcohol into the trolley when you don't want it?

Although, unless they are buying the lowest cost items available, there can't be that much alcohol in there, if the total cost of all the day's food and drink for 6 people comes to £250.

It seems unlikely that this is £50 of food and £200 of booze. And if it is, OP is just as responsible for the purchase.

If her sister is "difficult" as OP describes her, angling to pay less for what you eat, whilst ignoring all the extra costs and resources of hosting, is not going to be received well.

This!

makes sense from every angle to me 😀

Its going to be about 250 quid

Whatever is being purchased comes to £250. OP knows and chooses all of this (in fact in the OP does she even say she does the food shop with her sister?) so the £250 isn't the issue here, it's not a surprise to OP what has been purchased, or that she is expected to cover 1/3 of the bill as it is pre agreed that it covers 3 households for all of Christmas Day.

Post event, complaining that you're having to pay for the agreed portion of exactly what you were equally responsible for choosing and buying, because, for example, you didn't drink as much as you could have chosen too, seems off.

And if it's going to be at the level of wanting a more accurate split over the actual consumptions, then the sister should be entitled to nitpick over the cost of her utilities and cleaning and consumables...plus the value of her time and effort for the additional prepping and hosting.

Depending on where OP is location wise, she could always decline the invite from her sister and cook for just herself much cheaper than £83.33, or eat out. Here, a Christmas dinner, on Christmas Day, in a nice local restaurant, starts at £110, without drinks. Probably available for as little as £60 in some of the cheaper places but then potentially questionable quality.

I think if it was a £200 discrepancy to quibble, then it's worth the discussion. Over £20.80, when OP doesn't mention once that she's struggling for money, is it worth the upset it's likely to cause?

I mean if you are having smoked salmon, organic turkey and champagne then yes you will spend a lot of money! Most people who have a budget don’t have that level of luxury. We had a few bottles of discounted champagne from Morrisons this year, slow cooked gammon potatoes, veggies, pickles and a big homemade tiramisu for desert, snacks such as crisps, nuts, chocolate - lots of white/red/soft drinks and we already have lots of spirits. You have to cater to your budget and not pretend you are a millionaire!

Hi, all. Just popping in to appeal for a bit of peace and goodwill to all (wo)men in here, please. It's okay to disagree but do avoid personal attacks. As you were.

I mean if you are having smoked salmon, organic turkey and champagne then yes you will spend a lot of money! Most people who have a budget don’t have that level of luxury. We had a few bottles of discounted champagne from Morrisons this year, slow cooked gammon potatoes, veggies, pickles and a big homemade tiramisu for desert, snacks such as crisps, nuts, chocolate - lots of white/red/soft drinks and we already have lots of spirits. You have to cater to your budget and not pretend you are a millionaire!

Maybe because some families wouldn't expect to eat everything you've listed at Christmas - some would be happy with a main meal comprising of turkey (or whatever meat they eat) potatoes, carrots, sprouts, gravy - a dessert - and they might bring their own booze and snacks. Some people won't buy free range turkeys - they'll get cheaper ones and veg in several supermarkets ranges from 5-11p around Christmas.

Some people don't have the money to be buying smoked salmon, champagne. Port etc. That's reality for a lot of families these days - and some people will do it but they'll buy cheaper champagne, or cava or prosecco

Someone earlier in the thread said they fed ten people for 140 pounds - so it is possible

The fact you want to persist in misinterpreting something, despite being given factual context to the contrary, isn't my issue.

The only person calling two people on this thread various names, is you. The other poster wasn't rude to you either. Just because you like to call people things, doesn't make it so.

Hope you had a good Christmas and have a good new year as well. All the best (sincerely)

@Differentforgirls has no-one offered to host or bring a contribution of food/drink in those 25 years? Or are you a person who expects everyone to come to you?

@Differentforgirls has no-one offered to host or bring a contribution of food/drink in those 25 years? Or are you a person who expects everyone to come to you?