This is regarding DHs side as my side is the complete opposite.
DD is two and from PIL her main gift (I googled it yesterday as it seemed not fit for purpose and then I saw the generally bad reviews but only cost £20) with a few stocking fillers. You know when MIL has got a ‘bargain’ as she leaves the main price on but peels the sale sticker off. All of DD things had the main price left on. I don’t mind a bargain at all but these are clearly only bought because they ‘must have been a steal’ not with any real thought. All from Primark/George/the works. I’d understand if it was done under the premise she doesn’t really understand/done with thought/to their budget but they make out they spoil her… (they’re extremely comfortable/two cruises a year/worried about inheritance tax kind of budget).
His siblings will also get DD a token gift but spend probably spend a good £50 each other. His Uncle gave DH £60 but again nothing for DD either.
In DHs family they all do ‘lists’ (literally send a page of links for everyone to pick from) and last month DH sent his and DDs. MIL replied straight away that DD was already sorted.
DH has tried to get out of presents/lists but is in far too deep. A lot of what he puts on his lists are just for the sake of it (apparently you can’t put vouchers/things you need...) He has asked for nothing for himself but just for DD but he’s threatened with ‘surprises’ instead.
In the end PIL must have spent at least £250 on DH and DH £80 on them. They keep making comments on how DH must be struggling (no shit, we’ve got a young family we’re trying to prioritise here) as he’s only buying only gift each.
It’s the same on birthdays too.
I do end up feeling resentful how DH ends up with a huge pile of expensive stuff he’s not even fussed about, my family gives us token gifts but buys good gifts for DD and we end up spending a lot of our Christmas budget on DHs family who don’t even appreciate it/feels transactional in DH favour.