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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is anyone else just so fucking proud of their Christmas?

84 replies

Minjou · 25/12/2025 23:59

I have four children. They are adored by their parents. But both those parents grew up in, frankly, different but shit homes. These children have a dad who was beaten and belittled and who grew up with no self esteem at all. And they have a mother who was neglected and abandoned and grew up in and out of care, with the sort of issues you'd expect.

But these children....they have been prioritised and loved and cared for every day of their lives. They have parents who are far from perfect but who have never stopped trying. They have had another happy Christmas day with gifts and great food and games and fun, which is every Christmas they've ever had. They have only the vaguest idea of their parents background.

I never normally talk like this, but I'm drinking the gin my oldest child bought me for Christmas, because he's lovely and he knows me 🤣. AIBU to be just so fucking proud that we broke the cycles we both grew up with, and created this happy new family for ourselves? Because I am. It's the joy of life. It makes everything worthwhile

OP posts:
Penisbeakeralltheclassics · 26/12/2025 03:29

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Did yours buy you glue?

andIsaid · 26/12/2025 03:28

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Mrs Scrouge - bah humbug off with yourself.

andIsaid · 26/12/2025 03:26

Minjou · 25/12/2025 23:59

I have four children. They are adored by their parents. But both those parents grew up in, frankly, different but shit homes. These children have a dad who was beaten and belittled and who grew up with no self esteem at all. And they have a mother who was neglected and abandoned and grew up in and out of care, with the sort of issues you'd expect.

But these children....they have been prioritised and loved and cared for every day of their lives. They have parents who are far from perfect but who have never stopped trying. They have had another happy Christmas day with gifts and great food and games and fun, which is every Christmas they've ever had. They have only the vaguest idea of their parents background.

I never normally talk like this, but I'm drinking the gin my oldest child bought me for Christmas, because he's lovely and he knows me 🤣. AIBU to be just so fucking proud that we broke the cycles we both grew up with, and created this happy new family for ourselves? Because I am. It's the joy of life. It makes everything worthwhile

I LOVE THIS.

AND YOU.

Well bloody done.

JMSA · 26/12/2025 02:59

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Yeah, but you’re clearly not normal.

OP, you and your husband are amazing 💕

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 26/12/2025 02:36

Well done @Minjou and all the other folk who have broken /are breaking the cycle!

This thread really made me happy.

Happy Christmas all!

putini · 26/12/2025 02:30

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Oh dear lord ....😂

Pieceofpurplesky · 26/12/2025 01:53

Well done @Minjou, it's so important that we break these cycles. Single mum and it's been my mission to ensure DS does not take after his paternal family.
DS got me gin too ... we obviously have boys who know their mum's like a treat!

YesIReallyDidOK · 26/12/2025 01:48

Well done ❤️ Breaking the cycle is unbelievably hard, and people who haven't done it will never know. You should both be very, very proud (and feel a bit sorry for the arse who has to pick fault at people in the internet to feel good about themselves)

Meadowfinch · 26/12/2025 01:34

Yanbu OP. Christmas is as good a time as any to give yourself a quiet pat on the back.

I grew up in a FSM household with an abusive f and an exhausted dm. We were cold, scruffy, overcrowded and excluded from all normal childhood activities. I left at the first opportunity.

I'm a single mum but

  • My ds is happy, healthy, well fed & clothed
  • He goes to a lovely school and has all the support and encouragement I did not.
  • We live in a warm comfortable home with privacy and hot water
  • He has friends and hobbies, a social life, sports.
  • He is kind, thoughtful, confident, relaxed.
  • He is loved and knows I have his back.

And I cooked a storming Christmas lunch. 😊 It might be hard work but we are doing OK.

CrazyGoatLady · 26/12/2025 00:50

This is such a nice post to read. Well done you OP.

PrancerandDancer · 26/12/2025 00:45

Oh this has made me smile OP.

So you should be proud.

For me as a child, Christmas was spent at the pub and then the prospect of DV.

Tucking my child in to her bed in her safe home, filled with love and care is so special to me.

Its what every child deserves but I do feel a part of my inner child healing every Christmas

Okiedokie123 · 26/12/2025 00:36

@Minjou well done! I’m another very proud chain breaker.
We have also had a wonderful time so far.
Happy times!

SmileyMoonset · 26/12/2025 00:30

Aww! Sounds like you have had a lovely day, and have built a lovely family together. That really is something to be proud of.

ZeldaFighter · 26/12/2025 00:28

You both have every reason to be very proud 😀 Happy Christmas xxx

Minjou · 26/12/2025 00:28

I look at them and its not just that they are nothing like us (in the bad ways, they have hints of us in good ways), its that they don't even know what they escaped. I love that for them. I love the lives they have. My darlings are such easygoing happy people, I marvel at them daily.

Merry Christmas and happy all the years to all of us who have worked hard to change the pattern. 😍

OP posts:
Letsgoforaskip · 26/12/2025 00:24

It is incredibly hard to break the cycle and you should be extremely proud.
Enjoy the gin and your wonderful family 🥰🎄

Keha · 26/12/2025 00:22

This has really made me smile.

Minjou · 26/12/2025 00:21

elm26 · 26/12/2025 00:14

I’m not surprised you’re proud of yourselves! You have every right to be.

I was raised by my grandparents from the age of 7 due to my Mum being an alcoholic/drug addict, I was sexually assaulted multiple times and went to bed every night on a bed covered in cats wee.

I’m 32 now, with a wonderful marriage to a kind, hard working and amazing man, we have two beautiful, healthy children. We have a lovely home full of laughter and love, they have full tummies, unlimited cuddles and kisses, they go to bed every night in their clean beds, they are warm and safe and loved and content and I’m pretty damn proud of myself for breaking the cycle too!

Merry Christmas ♥️

Amazing. I hope you're incredibly proud of yourself @elm26, you should be.
Breaking the chains is not easy, and should be celebrated. You're amazing 😍

OP posts:
Doteycat · 26/12/2025 00:19

Hahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahhahahahahaahahahahhaahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaahahahaha

Doteycat · 26/12/2025 00:19

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Hahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahhahahahahaahahahahhaahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaahahahaha

Minjou · 26/12/2025 00:18

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

He's 22 and earned his own money. Why the fuck is that a bad thing? He knows I like gin but very rarely buy any, and he thought ( correctly) that I would like some at Christmas for a change. ..

How could you possibly be ashamed and mortified at that?

OP posts:
oilfilledradiator · 26/12/2025 00:18

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

FFS. Troll.
OP, hugely impressed by your tenacity and delighted for you at all you’ve achieved for yourself and your family. Happy Christmas.

SouthernNights59 · 26/12/2025 00:17

You have both earned the right to be proud. Well done!

bigboykitty · 26/12/2025 00:17

This is lovely, @Minjou . I'm glad you understand what a huge thing you've both accomplished. Merry Christmas. Please ignore the twerp who made the gin comment.

StrongandNorthern · 26/12/2025 00:16

Rosealea · 26/12/2025 00:12

Your child bought you gin? That's not something to be proud of in the slightest. I'd be ashamed and mortified!

Why?