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DH is a spoilt brat

214 replies

arcticpandas · 25/12/2025 09:11

He is going to be gifted a perfume today. He asked for 100 ml but Mil asked me to order 200 ml. I helped her out with her online orders. Partner said oh did I ask for a perfume? I told him yes. He said: but did I ask for 100 ml? I said yes but your mum might have gotten you more since she's generous, you will see.
He goes off yelling about not being able to take it on his travels (100 ml limit) and I should have known better and he has no use for 200 ml. I told him I don't travel often neither does Mil so how the fuck were we to think that he wanted his perfume for travel.

Mil has thrown ticket and box away so can't return. I am so furious with dh acting like a spoilt brat. Our kids would never act like this even if disappointed- they are teens and polite.

Later on he came and said sorry I shouldn't have reacted like that...and then he went on again talking about how he'll have no use for it and he will buy his 100 ml himself and how he will never ask for anything again ! Bonkers ! If it wasn't for my kids I would be leaving for a couple of days. Immature entitled twat!! I have been disappointed with gifts but never said something but believe me this year I will not save his feelings and will tell him to return anything I don't like. Would that be unreasonable?

OP posts:
Flowersforyourchocolateprettyplease · 26/12/2025 23:24

TheEverlastingPorridge · 25/12/2025 10:12

Yet you still call him "D" H - that is the most annoying part to me

Not about you though.
It's possible to love someone through their unreasonableness.

As others have said, probably a case of straw that broke the camels back and not about the actual perfume.

JoeyJava · 26/12/2025 23:00

Why would he even want perfume? Is he on a worldwide tour as a drag act?

Nearly50omg · 26/12/2025 21:13

katepilar · 25/12/2025 10:15

Parfumes dont decant easily, do they. None of mine had a bottle you can open and pour out of. You would need to spray it out to decant.

I understand he is totally frustrated. He asked for something, and got something different which he hasnt got a use for.
I personally fund the whole gift-giving culture really weird.

You don’t pour anything you take the lid off, put the decanter on and pump it up and down until the dispenser is full! They are £1 online and hold around 10ml pf
perfume

Diddlyumptious · 26/12/2025 21:11

Get him an atomiser job done

NoisyViewer · 26/12/2025 21:10

arcticpandas · 25/12/2025 13:04

🤣 No, no other woman. He uses perfume everyday, at home as well.

His mum doesn't take any of his shit thank god. She has always been loving but very strict when it comes to manners.

Yeah, I should just lbt for new year. Am packing my bags as I write this.

Omg. The usual leave him comments. Some people are ridiculous. It’s the first thing they suggest.

Tuesdayschild50 · 26/12/2025 20:17

DH more like Dear fuckwit fuck off !!
I couldn't put up with this shit from a grown man .

Ineffable23 · 26/12/2025 20:00

If he wants it to be lovely, would a posh, rather than inexpensive, atomiser do the trick?

E.g.

You might like this at John Lewis:
https://www.johnlewis.com/travalo-milano-refillable-perfume-atomiser-spray/p3139891?s_share=jlappdroid

Or this one is floral but it is also fabulous: https://www.libertylondon.com/uk/eden%E2%80%99s-awakening-refillable-travel-atomiser-000857127.html?queryID=4d62d79d42f14f9257346c3f986374ee&objectID=R695220006&indexName=production_emea_libertyltd_demandware_net__liberty__products__default&_gl=11xh7p3_upMQ.._gsMQ.._gaMTA2Njg3ODY1Mi4xNzY2Nzc5MTIw_ga_Z4XL3N68WHczE3NjY3NzkxMTkkbzEkZzEkdDE3NjY3NzkxMjEkajU4JGwwJGgw_ga_Y8M4SVRHWQ*czE3NjY3NzkxMTkkbzEkZzEkdDE3NjY3NzkxMjEkajU4JGwwJGgw&gclid=Cj0KCQiAgbnKBhDgARIsAGCDdlcd-rNJfT5_l71YlaiB5cE35AtdnOqeL3txvarqo1Vb8d4zuLXjxVEaAmV_EALw_wcB&gbraid=0AAAAAD4IbFGZh9Fh1of1-yIMNyb1qA9Pg

Liberty LBTY. Fragrance Eden’s Awakening Refillable Travel Atomiser | Liberty

Inspired by Liberty’s artisanal heritage, discover the Refillable Travel Atomiser, designed for bringing your favourite Liberty LBTY. Fragrance, and the artistr

https://www.libertylondon.com/uk/eden%E2%80%99s-awakening-refillable-travel-atomiser-000857127.html?_gl=1*1xh7p3*_up*MQ..*_gs*MQ..*_ga*MTA2Njg3ODY1Mi4xNzY2Nzc5MTIw*_ga_Z4XL3N68WH*czE3NjY3NzkxMTkkbzEkZzEkdDE3NjY3NzkxMjEkajU4JGwwJGgw*_ga_Y8M4SVRHWQ*czE3NjY3NzkxMTkkbzEkZzEkdDE3NjY3NzkxMjEkajU4JGwwJGgw&gbraid=0AAAAAD4IbFGZh9Fh1of1-yIMNyb1qA9Pg&gclid=Cj0KCQiAgbnKBhDgARIsAGCDdlcd-rNJfT5_l71YlaiB5cE35AtdnOqeL3txvarqo1Vb8d4zuLXjxVEaAmV_EALw_wcB&indexName=production_emea_libertyltd_demandware_net__liberty__products__default&objectID=R695220006&queryID=4d62d79d42f14f9257346c3f986374ee

NoisyViewer · 26/12/2025 19:53

Cupboarddoorknob · 25/12/2025 09:12

Wow. You sleep with this man?

😂 nothing sexy about a man child

catlover123456789 · 26/12/2025 19:35

Christ Alive, what a baby. Buy a little plastic bottle thing for it off amazon and ask him if he needs an IQ test too.

pictoosh · 26/12/2025 10:34

Bedhead1234 · 26/12/2025 08:37

Then why make a thread about it?

Surprised you have to ask but here we are.
Because she felt like it at the time. People's opinions and letting off steam. The usual reasons.
It's really not an invitation to direct her life for her.

SapphireSeptember · 26/12/2025 08:56

Bedhead1234 · 26/12/2025 08:37

Then why make a thread about it?

Because she can? I've started threads about lipstick and the first day of October!

Bedhead1234 · 26/12/2025 08:37

arcticpandas · 25/12/2025 20:42

Jesus. I have described one incident. Dh doesn't have form for being entitled and rude- quite the contrary. That's why I found it so strange and unsettling and thinking that he's close to a burnout.

I have done and said things in the past that I'm not proud of- it doesn't make me a horrible person. I condemn his behaviour but he's a decent man in general. Who I found attractive enough to marry and have kids with. I hope you don't judge yourself and others so harshly irl over isolated incidents.

Then why make a thread about it?

SpiralSister · 26/12/2025 08:34

Not sure the link worked properly, but search for ‘atomiser’ on the site..

SpiralSister · 26/12/2025 08:33

It all sounds terribly fraught, and his coping mechanisms, if he has any, are rubbish. This can be sorted though - maybe this is a catalyst for addressing his problems?

I do get the beautiful objects thing, although I hope I would never have been so horribly ungracious about a not quite right present.

Beautiful atomisers exist, which he might consider. These are easy to fill (pump action), and a real pleasure to use. Expensive too. Might work for him.

Penhaligon's | British Perfumers Established 1870

https://www.penhaligons.com/uk/en/c/fragrances--10000/travel-size-fragrances--10104

UncannyFanny · 26/12/2025 08:31

arcticpandas · 26/12/2025 07:14

I am not going to leave him because he acted like a dick on this one occasion. He cried yesterday saying he felt close to the edge of burnout. I am supporting him obviously and forgiving his outburst. He's a decent man normally and a good father to our children.

Oh they won’t like that OP. You’re supposed to hate men with every fibre of your being and file for divorce, not actually take marriage seriously. Shame on you. 😃

Celestialmoods · 26/12/2025 08:23

This is a perfect example of classic MN double standards and the crazy man haters are all over it. There are plenty of threads from women on here saying that they are upset by their present, all receiving sympathy and understanding and being told that they deserve better.

He reacted badly, but it is it reasonable to be a bit upset when you have been asked what you want for Christmas, then specified an exact thing, and been given something different. Men are not allowed to be disappointed with presents on MN, let alone express it.

SapphireSeptember · 26/12/2025 08:10

arcticpandas · 26/12/2025 07:14

I am not going to leave him because he acted like a dick on this one occasion. He cried yesterday saying he felt close to the edge of burnout. I am supporting him obviously and forgiving his outburst. He's a decent man normally and a good father to our children.

Been there, done that. It's the tiny thing that sparks and causes the explosion. Hope you're both okay. 💐

PantaloonMad · 26/12/2025 07:52

He does sound pathetic and rude, and he can just buy a travel atomiser very cheaply and easily if he wants to decant some to travel with. Very sorry for you and his mum!

pictoosh · 26/12/2025 07:48

You won't get many responses to your post there. It's not what people here want to hear.
Personally I'm glad you have been able to talk it out and move on from the incident. I think he behaved like an utter twat but to be honest and fair, many of us have our moments and so long as we can own them and apologise, life goes on.

arcticpandas · 26/12/2025 07:14

Ponoka7 · 26/12/2025 06:24

Is it really about him not being listened to, not being considered and him being ignored? That's what 'wrong' gifts usually symbolise for women. If he uses it at home, then it's a tantrum, but if he never, them I'd understand it. Is your marriage honestly ending, or are you joking? If it wasn't, I'd say start to talk to each other, because it does sound as though he's going into burnout.

I am not going to leave him because he acted like a dick on this one occasion. He cried yesterday saying he felt close to the edge of burnout. I am supporting him obviously and forgiving his outburst. He's a decent man normally and a good father to our children.

OP posts:
Ponoka7 · 26/12/2025 06:24

Is it really about him not being listened to, not being considered and him being ignored? That's what 'wrong' gifts usually symbolise for women. If he uses it at home, then it's a tantrum, but if he never, them I'd understand it. Is your marriage honestly ending, or are you joking? If it wasn't, I'd say start to talk to each other, because it does sound as though he's going into burnout.

NoSoupForU · 26/12/2025 05:04

He's obviously overreacted, and only you know whether that's the norm or wildly out of character.

But he asked for something specific. Then you and his mother have decided you know better. He shouldn't have to justify his reasons for requesting the specific size.

Roobarbtwo · 26/12/2025 04:35

arcticpandas · 25/12/2025 20:42

Jesus. I have described one incident. Dh doesn't have form for being entitled and rude- quite the contrary. That's why I found it so strange and unsettling and thinking that he's close to a burnout.

I have done and said things in the past that I'm not proud of- it doesn't make me a horrible person. I condemn his behaviour but he's a decent man in general. Who I found attractive enough to marry and have kids with. I hope you don't judge yourself and others so harshly irl over isolated incidents.

Sorry - burnout doesn't entitle you to act like a dick when someone has been decent enough to buy you a really decent present

The fact that he said he will have no use for it is preposterous. He's never home in between his travels?

I suffer from ptsd. It's horrible and debilitating. I don't use it to act like a dick if someone buys me a present I don't want

I hope his mum doesn't find out how he acted over this

Roobarbtwo · 26/12/2025 04:28

Stravaig · 25/12/2025 15:06

It's not just about the contents of the bottle, it's about the bottle itself. The 100 ml bottle will look different, feel different in the hand, take up a different space on the dresser or in a bag. Some people notice and care about such things.

Sorry what? If my mum bought me 200 ml of perfume I would be so thankful for it.

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