Paying grandparent for childcare

£40 a week for pick up & drop offs from school is not that different to what schools charge when you factor in its tax free, some will be cheaper. What are people missing?

Do they really need after school care if they are pre-teens?
I think for the sake of another year or so I’d leave things as they are because surely they will be fine for an hour or so soon if not already.

At the moment your able to work due to her childcare.

I think the fact the dc are in school is a bigger factor….

I think that your lucky to have your mil minding your kids for a £160 pm. This is far less than than childcare would cost. Your mil is also flexible with the days or hours she does. Most child care you pay x amount per week even if your child is not there for any number of reasons.
Another thing to consider is that because of minding your kids she is giving up her time and could be turning down days away or cheap holidays with friends.

At the moment your able to work due to her childcare. Your paying your NI stamps, can contribute into a pension and your building up work experience. When your kids are older you can change jobs or possibly get more hours in your current job later on.
You can look into getting further training or qualifications to move up the ladder job wise also.

At the moment I have a friend with a few kid's. She has been a sahm for over 15 years. She is trying to get back into the work force part time. She is currently in talks with an employer about doing 2 days a week. She is qualified and previously worked with well known places. She is trying to do 2 days a week because she can get help from her husband and a friend for after school care. She does not want to ask her mother or mil for childcare for a number of reasons. Also she does not want to be working just to pay child care. I know if I told her she could have childcare for what you're paying she jump at it.

I think that may be a better plan, not just for the sake of the money. It's not really working for the OP.

So you really expect her to do it for free with a smile and a pat on the back for being a good granny. The entitlement

Why wouldn’t the OP expect her parents to pick up her dc from school for free? It’s a completely normal thing to do.

@NewGoldFox Im confused why everyone is telling you it’s peanuts!
I would use the wrap around care & stop the nonsense tbh.

I'm a grandma as are many of my friends. I do several pick ups a week and do several full days a week care in the holidays. I would never dream of getting paid to do it, I've never till this post heard of a grandparent getting paid. It's shocking.

I think it's a privilege to spend time with my grandchild, my own flesh and blood, whom I love very much. I love my very close relationship with them. I help out because I adore my child and grandchild and want to make their life easier, paying me would feel as if it was reduced to a business transaction.

I offered to do the childcare when my grandchild was born and we have adjusted the days and hours as my grandchild has got older. I cannot ever imagine being in the situation where I would ask or my child would offer to be paid.

Not taking the children to the pantomime with them is seriously weird.

It depends on what kind of person you are.

If you want everything to be purely transactional then decide a price or don't help them out.

@NewGoldFox you picked the wrong site for this topic!

They may not even need/want your help. Why are you preparing for this? You sound very resentful

I don't know any grandparents that charge their adult children for regular childcare. I and all the other grandparents I know that do or did regular childcare, did it free of charge.

or discussion sakes, what sort of arrangement do you think I can expect when they are elderly and in need of help. Will I be putting my hand out for hospital visits/food shopping trips? Or am I absolved of this responsibility by virtue of paying now.

Nothing, unless they pay you. And remember you are cheaper than a carer!

I think it’s outrageous that you have to pay! Can’t you use wrap around care & get the 20% off tax free?

Quote didn’t work on random 100 above…

It’s peanuts in the scheme of things. Think of it as a payment to keep the family civil if you must. This isn’t a business relationship don’t treat it as one, it you’d be paying much more for a start.

Please don't start this again. It's highly unlikely that people who are young now will ever be in as fortunate as some older people are now. Pensions are simply not as valuable and the housing market does not offer the same opportunity to make money by doing nothing. Wages are lower and the cost of living is much higher. But more than that, the sense of entitlement makes me sick. So please don't derail the thread.

Time and time again, "they've paid off their mortgage, they've got savings"..
That's the way it should be! It's not greed.

💯

It’s so common on mn unfortunately.

Yes, same here. It's as if younger people resent older people having savings and a pension - it's what you work 40+ years for!
I don't get that attitude either.

Bloody hell. Talk about slave labour!

36 years ago I paid my mum £10 a day for looking after my daughter. I paid her every week, whether she had my child or not. Her financial situation was irrelevant to that.

I was just grateful that my daughter was receiving the most wonderful care and forming a strong bond with her grandmother.

Yes, I do think you're being unreasonable.

And this is why I won’t be providing any childcare for any future grandchildren.

It’s never appreciated. I’m spending my retirement in the sun no monotonous school drop off and picks ups for me. Did my fair share and not doing it again.

I bet you wouldn’t want an MIL like me hey Op?