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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel like I don’t like men anymore

463 replies

Dogsinsantasuits · 23/12/2025 21:38

Not as in not attracted to them, although I am less bothered these days
It’s almost like i’m coming to a realisation that most (not all) are not great and women are infinitely stronger people.
Is this an age thing-late 40’s? Sad as I used to really like men. Now all I see around me is amazing women with men who aren’t a patch on them or dangerous and/or perverted men in the news.

OP posts:
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5
HornyHornersPinkyWinky · 24/12/2025 16:25

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 14:47

But if practicality all men are useless shits, and practically all women are amazing competent superwomen, or so we're led to believe on this thread, how come there isn't even one all-female oil rig in the North Sea for example?

Why are they all operated by useless, incompetent men?

Most people on here are talking about how men act in relationships and family dynamics.
Who cares what job they do if they’re fucking useless fathers and husbands..

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 16:14

KimberleyClark · 24/12/2025 16:00

Women still need men to become pregnant. Humans can’t yet reproduce by parthenogenesis or immaculate conception. Sperm has to come from somewhere, it can’t be manufactured, where do you think it comes from?

Alright, Kimberley!
I guess I meant the use of a sperm bank,
I'm aware of sperm coming from men.
"No direct contact with a man", I should have used!
From some of your posts, you seem very down to earth and no nonsense, so next time I'll be precise! 😊

OverlyFragrant · 24/12/2025 16:08

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 16:03

I'd be genuinely surprised if more than 10% of women could change a car tyre unassisted from start to finish.

Not many men know how to do this either. Its not like knowing how to change tyres is specific to the Y chromosome, like anything it is a skill that is learnt.

likeafishneedsabike · 24/12/2025 16:05

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 16:03

I'd be genuinely surprised if more than 10% of women could change a car tyre unassisted from start to finish.

Cringing in shame that I have no idea how to….Time to learn.

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 16:03

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 15:49

Can't they? They might not use a car to bother with this.
How about fixing a roof, window, cutting grass with a scythe, build a wall, fire a licensed weapon?
Competent, independent women don't need men for anything, not even to become pregnant anymore. 😂
Interesting I live in these times.

I'd be genuinely surprised if more than 10% of women could change a car tyre unassisted from start to finish.

SpoonBaloon · 24/12/2025 16:03

fishtank12345 · 24/12/2025 14:14

I cant speak for all men but I have felt failed by all the men in my life. Dh is soft and kind but clearly neurodiverse. I take on most of life planning. My dad... no longer see him was very selfish and aggressive. My mum married another 3 men... horrible people.

I think a woman who marries at least three times and has a daughter by a fourth man is also letting you down, tbh.

KimberleyClark · 24/12/2025 16:00

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 15:49

Can't they? They might not use a car to bother with this.
How about fixing a roof, window, cutting grass with a scythe, build a wall, fire a licensed weapon?
Competent, independent women don't need men for anything, not even to become pregnant anymore. 😂
Interesting I live in these times.

Women still need men to become pregnant. Humans can’t yet reproduce by parthenogenesis or immaculate conception. Sperm has to come from somewhere, it can’t be manufactured, where do you think it comes from?

SillyNavyTiger · 24/12/2025 16:00

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 14:58

Many - most - adults of oil rig age have children. Mums, luckily, recognise that being present to bring up their children is one of the most important jobs ever, so would rule out such a job.

How insulting, and depressing that some people still believe that.

Women can, and DO work in jobs where they have to work away, to travel, to be deployed. Mothers can proudly join the military and do any job a dad can do.

Life doesn't stop because you have children. We don't expect all men to become office workers doing a 9 to 5 weekdays the minute they have a baby, why on earth should we expect women to do that, if they don't want to?

It's 2025, no place for that backward thinking. "Stepford wives" are a movie character, not a role model.

We should be grateful that children can be proud of their working mum just as much as they are proud of their dads. Being an amazing mother doesn't mean you have to stay home if you don't want to.

SpoonBaloon · 24/12/2025 15:55

JHound · 24/12/2025 09:58

I think these posts are the very opposite of an “incel’s wet dream”.

Incels hate women because they cannot get the specific ones they feel entitled to.

I don’t see that happening here.

Have you read the thread? There are loads of posts where a woman wishing she could be whisked away by a tall, strong man who’ll provide for her. “There are no good ones left”.

And they do seem to think they’re entitled to one.

This is exactly what we are told boys believe women think and we offer mealy mouthed denials but this thread seems to show that it’s a reality.

SillyNavyTiger · 24/12/2025 15:52

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 15:25

Oh my, this is really embarrassing for you. You’ve completely misunderstood and it really wasn’t difficult. Something is beginning to make sense now 😂. Not nearly all men commit crimes, but of the crimes are committed, nearly all are committed by men. 😂

and yet, "men" are our enemies, and women talk about "sisterhood" but come up with these nasty little posts 😂calling themselves superior. Love this.

Thank you so much for proving my point. 👏😂😂 It doesn't help the stereotypes against women, so I should be annoyed but you are too funny.

And read the post I was replying to, that might help 😉

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 15:49

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 15:40

Oh yes of course, that's the reason. 😂

I wonder how many of the amazing competent women on this thread who are shitting all over useless men can even change a car tyre on their own? Very few I'd imagine. Despite their amazing competence.

Can't they? They might not use a car to bother with this.
How about fixing a roof, window, cutting grass with a scythe, build a wall, fire a licensed weapon?
Competent, independent women don't need men for anything, not even to become pregnant anymore. 😂
Interesting I live in these times.

Moonlightfrog · 24/12/2025 15:47

I think it’s an age thing and being wise. I am 44 and feel the same, most men I meet seem pretty pathetic, some are very needy and childish. I have a few male friends but there’s no way I would want to spend more than the odd day with them. I think we just become less tolerant of bull shit as we get older and we realise that we don’t need a man to complete us. I love being single, love my own company and I don’t miss the hassle of being in a relationship.

Rubyslippers25 · 24/12/2025 15:44

VoltaireMittyDream · 24/12/2025 01:29

I’m going to go out on a limb and say there’s a particular issue with fecklessness, grumpiness and inertia among straight men middle aged and older. I know a lot of gay men who are hugely capable and energetic and engaged / engaging throughout the lifespan, but relatively few straight men who make it past 50 without becoming helpless, grouchy, embittered, and sedentary.

I don’t notice so much of an age-related temperamental change in women unless they are living alone in their 70s and beyond, when I think there’s a tendency to become quite anxious and rigid about plans.

Edited

Maybe that's because gay men don't have a female partner who they expect will do everything for them so they have to be less lazy?

TrishM80 · 24/12/2025 15:40

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 14:58

Many - most - adults of oil rig age have children. Mums, luckily, recognise that being present to bring up their children is one of the most important jobs ever, so would rule out such a job.

Oh yes of course, that's the reason. 😂

I wonder how many of the amazing competent women on this thread who are shitting all over useless men can even change a car tyre on their own? Very few I'd imagine. Despite their amazing competence.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 24/12/2025 15:39

JHound · 24/12/2025 14:10

People wanting a same sex Dr typically have a reason for that.

It's true and often with good reason in their own heads but it's also giving their fears licence to behave in a bigoted or prejudices way. If a man refused a woman Dr on the basis that he didn't trust women there would be outrage. Similarity if someone objected to the Dr's nationality, skin tone or religion. It's prejudice and nothing else.

BrightLights989 · 24/12/2025 15:30

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 15:08

lol, the poor menz not being allowed to rape women any more.

How did you jump to that conclusion. The OP implied normal men. Not criminals.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 24/12/2025 15:29

Wow its been about 48 hours since someone started thread saying how much they hate men.

Rainbowcat77 · 24/12/2025 15:29

I’m a lesbian (always have been) and I’ve noticed an increasing number of later in life lesbians who are “straight” until their families are complete and grown then change around 45+
I think partly the biological urge to find a man to have kids with goes plus maturing and realising that a lot of men have treated them poorly and been a bit crap generally makes older women realise that they’d rather be with their own sex.

Pavementworrier · 24/12/2025 15:25

I think maybe some women were daft in youth and are overcompensating now.

Anyway, I love men and I love women. I think if you hate an entire sex you're probably a bit of a duff human being.

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 15:25

SillyNavyTiger · 24/12/2025 15:15

yes, it is , nearly all men.
Give me strength. I sincerely hope you haven't got sons 🙄

Do you genuinely believe that (nearly) all men you live with/ live next to/ work with/ look after your own children/ look after your health, all the male emergency service and rescue workers, (nearly) ALL the men are jumping to war/ rape/ murder? Seriously?

Do you see (nearly) all male figure around you as a threat? For real?

Oh my, this is really embarrassing for you. You’ve completely misunderstood and it really wasn’t difficult. Something is beginning to make sense now 😂. Not nearly all men commit crimes, but of the crimes are committed, nearly all are committed by men. 😂

SillyNavyTiger · 24/12/2025 15:18

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 15:16

That hit me at 42.
I hate men.
Also, as soon as I learned my own value, without anyone else's "kind" input, I stopped having sex immediately.
My husband is significantly older, so no issues.😊
Sorry for the blunt language, it's just a raw truth.

I am very confident about my own value. I still like sex. with men (well, with ONE man to be precise, I am not into orgies 😂)

Luckyingame · 24/12/2025 15:16

That hit me at 42.
I hate men.
Also, as soon as I learned my own value, without anyone else's "kind" input, I stopped having sex immediately.
My husband is significantly older, so no issues.😊
Sorry for the blunt language, it's just a raw truth.

SillyNavyTiger · 24/12/2025 15:15

Pinkchristmastree6 · 24/12/2025 14:19

It's all the violence in the world ,the wars ,the rapes ,the murders..it's nearly all men

yes, it is , nearly all men.
Give me strength. I sincerely hope you haven't got sons 🙄

Do you genuinely believe that (nearly) all men you live with/ live next to/ work with/ look after your own children/ look after your health, all the male emergency service and rescue workers, (nearly) ALL the men are jumping to war/ rape/ murder? Seriously?

Do you see (nearly) all male figure around you as a threat? For real?

arethereanyleftatall · 24/12/2025 15:08

BrightLights989 · 24/12/2025 15:02

Are they driven or most aren't getting any? If most men had a healthy sex life, especially when young adult life, they might be less driven by it throughout their life.

lol, the poor menz not being allowed to rape women any more.

BrightLights989 · 24/12/2025 15:02

Usernamen · 23/12/2025 23:11

I’m neither disgusted by nor scared of them, but you’re definitely onto something with the losing respect point. I think realising how driven by sex they are was a turning point. I just find it so pathetic.

Are they driven or most aren't getting any? If most men had a healthy sex life, especially when young adult life, they might be less driven by it throughout their life.