Page 20 | To not want DD to go out to a club/nightclub on Christmas Day?

StrawberryCreamField · 2025-12-23T14:26:35+00:00

Would you be happy with this? DD (18, her birthday was last week) wants to go out to a nightclub on Christmas Day. I don’t think she should as Christmas Day is a day to spend with family and for her to spend with us and her siblings and she could go out on any other day/night. DD is still saying she wants to go out though. DH thinks I’m being unreasonable and he thinks it’s fine for her to go out on Christmas Day. AIBU?

Dollymylove · 23/12/2025 16:21

Some pubs (when we still had some) used to open lunchtime and evening (before 24 hour drinking) my friends used to meet up for a few drinks before going off to our families for crimbo lunch. This was back in the 80s. I never heard of nightclubs being open though.
I would probably have gone if they did 😆

TokyoSushi · 23/12/2025 16:21

At 2pm, no. Any time after 7/8pm, fine.

ThatChihuahuaMakesMeLaugh · 23/12/2025 16:21

Clubbing in the usual manner wouldn't really disturb our family time at Christmas as we wind down by about 8.

So you think an adult child has to fit in and do what suits you because it’s what you want, what about what she wants? When your children become adults, you do have to see them as individuals who can make their own choices and that includes what they want to do on Xmas day.

Original poster

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:20

chipsandpeas · 23/12/2025 16:19

shes 18 fuck sake, why does she need to show you proof that its open??

Because I’m doubting if it’s actually open like DD says it is.

OP posts:

vanillalattes · 23/12/2025 16:20

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:14

DD is refusing to agree to any compromise. I’m not happy with her not pre booking her taxis either.

She's an adult, she doesn't need to compromise with you.

smallchange · 23/12/2025 16:19

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:14

DD is refusing to agree to any compromise. I’m not happy with her not pre booking her taxis either.

Yep, it sounds like a recipe for her getting stranded somewhere and (hopefully) calling you to come to the rescue.

Christmas plans like this need... planning because places/services that are open are in high demand so need booking in advance. I don't think it's unreasonable for an newly 18 year old to be expected to show you that she's made actual plans with actions, not vibes, or own up that she's actually going to a party because someone's got an empty.

Moonnstarz · 23/12/2025 16:19

Who is she supposedly going out with?

chipsandpeas · 23/12/2025 16:19

shes 18 fuck sake, why does she need to show you proof that its open??

RawBloomers · 23/12/2025 16:17

If she's only just told you and the normal Christmas day routine is a late Christmas lunch and family time in the evening, then I think that's pretty rude of her.

It's the going out at 2 pm that I'd be really annoyed about. Clubbing in the usual manner wouldn't really disturb our family time at Christmas as we wind down by about 8.

It seems odd to me that she has several friends who are heading out at 2. When I was that sort of age I enjoyed Christmas day at home, as did my friends.
We wouldn't have been planning on going out and missing out on lunch! Though I could see us planning a meet up in the evening.

ABeerInTheSunshineMakesMeHappy · 23/12/2025 16:17

It’s not difficult to get a taxi (Uber) on Christmas Day where I live.

godmum56 · 23/12/2025 16:16

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:16

For the posters asking where nightclubs are open on Christmas Day, we are in Blackpool. But DD hasn’t provided any proof that the nightclub in question is open on Christmas Day though, I only have her word for it.

Edited

and again how will you stop her?

Abitofapain · 23/12/2025 16:16

Making her stay in to have “fun” with the family will guarantee she has no fun - with the family or her friends. And probably the family will feel her misery too!

Original poster

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:16

For the posters asking where nightclubs are open on Christmas Day, we are in Blackpool. But DD hasn’t provided any proof that the nightclub in question is open on Christmas Day though, I only have her word for it.

OP posts:

ABeerInTheSunshineMakesMeHappy · 23/12/2025 16:15

I would assume that she’s seeing a boyfriend/girlfriend and she doesn’t want to tell you about them yet, for whatever reason.

I can remember being an older teen though, and to me, Christmas days were pretty boring, generally just a time for sleeping off a hangover.

loopyloolou · 23/12/2025 16:15

aCatCalledFawkes · 23/12/2025 16:11

Do you not think that it would be nice if they were to to stay in because they wanted to not because they are told they are have to?

Whilst I wouldn't go out at 2pm on Christmas Day myself, if that is what my 18yr old wanted to do I would support her because the only thing that's going to happen otherwise is she's going to feel she's missing out which in turn will make the day miserable for us all because she's miserable. Not what I would describe as quality family time.

I would rather make the most of the morning and bring lunch forward so we can still enjoy some of the day with her. To add my daughter has always gone to her Dads every other year so we are all very flexible in accommodating what she wants.

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My kids and the family play stupid games, will do karaoke, they aren’t miserable, they fully join in so I’m not worried about them being miserable and as I said below they’ve both invited friends over to ours on Boxing Day ! So think they enjoy time with us

m00rfarm · 23/12/2025 16:15

There are clubs open on Christmas Day but transport may be more of an issue.

godmum56 · 23/12/2025 16:14

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:14

DD is refusing to agree to any compromise. I’m not happy with her not pre booking her taxis either.

and again, how will you stop her?

Original poster

StrawberryCreamField · 23/12/2025 16:14

DD is refusing to agree to any compromise. I’m not happy with her not pre booking her taxis either.

OP posts:

Drivinghomeforchristmas25 · 23/12/2025 16:13

She can do whatever she likes really, she is an adult. But I really do not think she’s going clubbing at 2pm? And she won’t book a taxi? It’s all a bit sus. I think she is going to be doing something else entirely. Secret boyfriend/girlfriend perhaps?

Christmascaketime · 23/12/2025 16:12

It all sounds very odd. Nightclubs usually are Xmas eve.
I think if she’s 18 at school and living at home she needs to fit in with family. So have Christmas lunch then go out.
Does she realise how expensive taxis are as day and often need pre booking.
My dd is 19 and I wouldn’t be saying ok.

BeMellowAquaSquid · 23/12/2025 16:12

Not much you can do to stop her guarantee it will be shit and she won’t want to do it again.

aCatCalledFawkes · 23/12/2025 16:11

loopyloolou · 23/12/2025 16:01

Of course if they are travelling or studying abroad which one of mine did, that’s quite different, but to go out with mates at 2pm on Xmas day is quite different !

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Do you not think that it would be nice if they were to to stay in because they wanted to not because they are told they are have to?

Whilst I wouldn't go out at 2pm on Christmas Day myself, if that is what my 18yr old wanted to do I would support her because the only thing that's going to happen otherwise is she's going to feel she's missing out which in turn will make the day miserable for us all because she's miserable. Not what I would describe as quality family time.

I would rather make the most of the morning and bring lunch forward so we can still enjoy some of the day with her. To add my daughter has always gone to her Dads every other year so we are all very flexible in accommodating what she wants.

2026isgoingtobebetter · 23/12/2025 16:10

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This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

loopyloolou · 23/12/2025 16:09

NerrSnerr · 23/12/2025 16:01

Mine are primary aged. I just think it should the the adult who makes the decision where to spend Christmas without either mum telling them or guilting them into it. It should be for them to consider where they want to be, not you.

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It would be interesting how you feel when they are adults, but no guilting, it’s just the way it is, they know friends and partners are welcome anytime to join in, they have friends over all the time except Xmas day as all there friends are with there families. It’s only Xmas day, they can do whatever they want they want any other day, though they invited friends over to ours on Boxing Day so will have a houseful, it works for us !

TinselTitts · 23/12/2025 16:09

Gardener82 · 23/12/2025 16:01

I don’t think she’s telling you the truth. Nightclubs don’t open on Christmas Day.

Apparently some do in London but not many and they're all ticketed in advance.