AIBU to keep the cheese?

Of course you’re not going to have to pay for the second cheese. It’s not your fault the delivery got messed up. They won’t be able to sell it now, so they’ll tell you to keep it. This is a non issue. Just go and enjoy the cheese.

Cheese freezes...

You're way overthinking the cheese. Email them and explain. Ask them if they want to collect it. They won't. That's it. Not sure why it's taking up any of your headspace really.

If their customer service is that good they'll either pay for a return courier themselves, as it was their error and therefore up to them to sort out, or (more likely) they'll tell you to just keep it and waive the cost.
If they did say you need to pay for the second lot, you'd be within your rights to laugh in their face. But I suspect they won't.

If it's a DPD issue, they will have had to pay for the cost of replacements, so the Cheese Company won't lose out.
I had this earlier in the year - and now I have two beanbags having only paid for one! I phone the company and they said it's on DPD.
Enjoy your bonus!

You keep pushing back on people telling you to contact the company. A quick email is not going to disrupt your arrangements that much and you've spent time typing on here, so what's the difference really? They're aware of the situation so just give them the update and ask them what they want to do and explain that if they need the cheese back then your plans are such that they will need to arrange collection. They can't charge you twice because you ordered once.

Personally I would just call them.

I would ring and ask them to arrange collection and realistically they are likely to say keep. If they don’t they will need to arrange collection, you haven’t capacity to send it back.

I had similar happen with a nursing top when I was heavily pregnant, I explained to the company I didn't have capacity to go to the post office but they could arrange collection, they let me keep it.

I would just keep it and not tell the company.

I would have no issue keeping the cheese and wouldn't attempt to resolve it

They cannot ask you to pay for the cheese and they will not be able to resell it so won't want you to return in. So just call them and chill out. I mean this kindly, but you're making a mountain out of a molehill and it could all have been sorted by now.

So explain that. Just let the company know that both deliveries have arrived and ask them what they would like you to do, but say in the email that you do not live near a post office/evri store and will not be able to return the extra cheese until after Christmas.

They've probably written off the cost of it, especially as it's perishable so they can't resell it, and will let you keep it, but you'll feel better if you keep it with their blessing.

This definitely isn't your problem and they will know that, but it's also sad for businesses to lose income thanks to the crapness of delivery companies. Hopefully they can claim it back off the courier company anyway.

They really wouldn’t want it back, it’s been too long out of the chilled delivery supply chain to guarantee quality/safety so they would have to bin it.
try posting it on Olio if you want to pass it on to someone else

yes!

If you don't want to call them because you don't want to risk being asked to return it, then don't. Just keep it, it's perishable so nothing to be done.

They won't ask you to return it, but if you're stretched, no need to call.

They can't charge you twice for cheese you only ordered once. They had the contract with the delivery company who screwed up, not you, so why do you think they would ask you to take responsibility for returning it. Call them and tell them you received a notification and found the "lost" order on your doorstep. You can tell them it's available for collection and let them decide what they want to do.

I would email them to explain the other set was dumped on your doorstep by DPD this morning without them even knocking. You’re super busy and don’t have time to drop it at a DPD store or whatever so what would they like you to do.

I suspect they will just say keep it.

Keep the cheese. After Christmas write them an amazing review. Leave out the double delivery so they don't get deluged by scammers, but everything else ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Keep the cheese, they'll have insurance to cover things like this.

In the time you’ve spent thinking/posting about it you could have resolved it with a quick phone call.

I am a massive over thinker which leads to procrastination like this so I totally understand the overwhelm but just call them so it’s not hanging over you

Contact them and ask. Most likely they will tell you to keep it at this stage. If not they will likely arrange a courier to collect from you- you won’t have to do anything apart from hand it over.

I would contact the company and ask what they want

I'd email the company they'll probably just tell you to keep it 💕 the same happened to my friend with Amazon and they told her to keep both items 🙂