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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Received helped, but feel bad!

55 replies

Kardelen · 22/12/2025 22:35

I dropped my bunch of keys in a sewer drain at the side of the road. I had just parked and was getting out of the car when my keys fell onto the ground and slid down the drain!

this was after my 13.5 hour shift. I was knackered and just stopped to collect a parcel as it was the last hours.

some people saw me and came to rescue. Someone had a torch with magnet so he offered to give it to me if I pay him 10£.
but later said he can put it in a plastic bag and cellotape it so that way it won’t get damaged.

Another passer saw and said he has a magnet but it’s in at home and for me to wait 10 minutes as he will go home and get it.

while waiting I still tried to look for it but it didn’t work. And he actually came with the magnets!

he helped me to rescue the keys. I offered to pay him but he declined.

i feel so so emotional that people stopped and tried to help. And also this particular person actually went out of his way, went home and came back with the magnet. Even brought water to wash the keys and my hands.

i don’t know this person, don’t even know his name. But I’m so thankful for his help! I feel so bad that he had to do all this :(

should I have just forced to give money/ or buy something from the shop?

i did offer to buy something or give money but he refused and said he is just happy that he was able to help- but I’m feeling so bad.

OP posts:
JLou08 · 22/12/2025 22:44

I think it's unusual to feel bad about someone helping you. Most people would feel grateful and possibly uplifted that there are nice people around.
Why do you think you feel bad? Is it unusual for you to be helped or for you to help others?

greenwithglee · 22/12/2025 22:41

the person asking for money was a chancer.

Celestialmoods · 22/12/2025 22:41

Just pay it forward the next time you are in a position to give help to someone who needs it.

ItsDarkNow · 22/12/2025 22:38

Why are you feeling bad?
The vast majority of people are happy to help others without expecting anything in return.

Blueskiesnotgrey · 22/12/2025 22:38

I don't really understand this. the one wanting money was a chance. You don't have to pay people for being kind and helpful. And the vast majority of people would not expect money or any reward.