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Original poster

For fuck’s sake - I cannot take this anymore

131 replies

fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:13

I live in a small house with DH and two DC. The constant stream of crap into our house completely overwhelms me. DH insists on buying absolutely rubbish toys and comics constantly for the kids that we can’t afford, along with the inevitable plastic tat (or yet another pack of small pencils, even though we have tons of pencils already). A week after they come into the house I chuck it all into the bin and the DC don’t even notice. It disgusts me that our house has basically become an intermediary stop for a load of plastic tat between shop and landfill. I’ve told DH not to do this but he doesn’t stop. I’ve had enough and am at my wits end. I want to have a few mindful toys that are good quality, not this constant stream of plastic crap. How can I force him to stop?

OP posts:
Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:43

To add: I do pass on quality toys and clothes to charity shops. But I don’t think it’s right to inundate them with crap that nobody will want! I doubt anyone is going to walk into a charity shop and pay money for some tat that came free with a comic.

OP posts:
Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:41

Espressosummer · 21/12/2025 21:39

You're not being very eco-conscious if you are just chucking it all in the bin. Maybe collect it on one side so your husband can see just how much he is buying.

What else am I meant to do with it? We’d have an absolute ton of this stuff if I didn’t get rid. Plus passing it on to charity shops is just making it someone else’s problem.

OP posts:
PauliesWalnuts · 21/12/2025 21:40

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 21/12/2025 21:23

i understand that. Doesn't answer the question though.

Show quote history

She’s literally just answered your question!

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:40

I wish comics did equal reading. But my kids just rip off the plastic toys, give a cursory flick through the comic and that’s it.

OP posts:
Espressosummer · 21/12/2025 21:39

You're not being very eco-conscious if you are just chucking it all in the bin. Maybe collect it on one side so your husband can see just how much he is buying.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 21/12/2025 21:38

If you have a clear plastic tub with a lid, the pencils can be decanted into that with sharpeners/erasers/rulers - that can be a visual guide to not actually needing anymore - as it may be that as soon as something isn't right in sight, it's ceasing to exist in either the children's or their father's eyes.

Comics = reading.

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:38

I’m just sick of the endless stream of rubbish coming into our house, then exiting via the bin a week later. I feel like I’m a rubbish sorting facility. Plus it’s horrendous for the planet.

OP posts:
Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:36

Not to mention the endless packets of tiny pencils and pens when we’ already have a perfectly good set of both at home

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Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:35

KabukiNoh · 21/12/2025 21:33

I have refused to buy my kids those crappy magazines with plastic crap on them for years despite the constant pleading. I have on occasion bought the ones with Lego as that is not thrown away. But mainly they have subscriptions to comics that are (slightly) better quality and certainly without any extra crap.

Yes, Lego is absolutely fine. It’s the fake mobile phones, the cheap and tacky wands, the crappy building blocks that don’t even stick together properly, the purses with (quite frankly disturbing) odd characters on them etc etc etc that I don’t like!

OP posts:
TeaRoseTallulah · 21/12/2025 21:35

Don't argue, just donate them to a charity shop. The kids will be too old soon anyway for those kind of toys.

KabukiNoh · 21/12/2025 21:33

I have refused to buy my kids those crappy magazines with plastic crap on them for years despite the constant pleading. I have on occasion bought the ones with Lego as that is not thrown away. But mainly they have subscriptions to comics that are (slightly) better quality and certainly without any extra crap.

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:31

I don’t often say this, but in this instance I do think I am right and he is wrong? What can possibly be right about buying a constant stream of crappily made plastic “toys” from China that the kids play with for a day and then forget about?

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 21/12/2025 21:28

Would it bother you less if it was charity shop stuff ie second hand - could he take them there or to car boot sales etc to get stuff? And then donate it back when you have a clear out, rather than throwing away (which you could do now if the stuff is sellable).

I don't think you can override because of a moral highground. You have different beliefs and values around this issue, but that doesn't mean one of you is right and the other is wrong.

u3ername · 21/12/2025 21:28

Can you get him a book about being eco conscious for Christmas? Also ‘the joy of living with less’ or something similar? May be, the Marie Kondo book too. If he likes reading that is…

A few people in my extended family have a buying problem, which is linked to not having had much as a child.

MeinKraft · 21/12/2025 21:28

This would annoy me too but you can’t force him to stop. Because you share the kids, the house and the money and he’s allowed to make his own choices about what to bring into it. Unless he never tidies up all of the little toys or doesn’t contribute to the bills fairly in which case you’ve got bigger problems than the little toys.

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:25

SparkyBlue · 21/12/2025 21:23

I think we are married to the same man. I think in my DHs case he couldn’t afford things in his childhood so he over compensates now.

Hmm, I think that might be the case with my DH too.

OP posts:
Flibbertyfloo · 21/12/2025 21:25

As a short term measure back it all up and then offer it to the local school for their summer fete or stick it on a free Facebook group.

Could you move to the idea of pocket money instead and encourage the kids to save for a much wanted item instead?

Witchyvibes · 21/12/2025 21:24

Involve the kids. Talk to them about the environment and saving the earth, taking care of toys etc., and that if something new comes in, something old has to go out. School did something similar with mine and they’ve been great about saying no to stuff they don’t actually want.

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:24

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 21/12/2025 21:23

i understand that. Doesn't answer the question though.

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Well I think it does. My feelings should override his in this instance because I’m clearly right.

OP posts:
SparkyBlue · 21/12/2025 21:23

I think we are married to the same man. I think in my DHs case he couldn’t afford things in his childhood so he over compensates now.

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 21/12/2025 21:23

fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:21

Because I think it’s wrong to buy a constant stream of cheap plastic tat that is used for five minutes then discarded when the planet is facing a climate disaster?

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i understand that. Doesn't answer the question though.

JohnofWessex · 21/12/2025 21:23

Plus of course the cost of it ......

You could have a decent trip on the proceeds once or twice a year

Original poster
fedupwiththisshit2 · 21/12/2025 21:21

ChillingWithMySnowmies · 21/12/2025 21:20

why should your feelings on it override his and your childrens?

Edited
Show quote history

Because I think it’s wrong to buy a constant stream of cheap plastic tat that is used for five minutes then discarded when the planet is facing a climate disaster?

OP posts:
Echobelly · 21/12/2025 21:21

That would drive me nuts as well. Can you talk to DH about maybe finding another way to 'treat' the kids that might be less wasteful? Like taking to the park more often, doing something together instead?

CrustyBread1977 · 21/12/2025 21:20

Does he buy them stuff to keep them amused, so he doesn’t have to?

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