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To ask what very normal part of being a woman you were gaslit about?

83 replies

BlackCatDiscoClub · 21/12/2025 10:50

Thankfully we are at a time when women's bodies and their experiences are much better understood and talked about, but it wasn't always like that! I'm only in my 40s but I have one I'd like to share:

Ovulation pain. Ever since my cycles began, I have had quite severe ovulation pain. Even today when I'm in peri, the pain can be so sharp that it takes my breath away, or I have to limp when I walk to take the pressure of it. But I remember when I was younger telling people about it, and how I could tell which ovary was ovulating because of the pain, and was outright told "no thats not possible, ovulation pain isn't a thing". It was only in my 30s that I discovered that in Germany they had always known about ovulation pain, and called it mittelschmerz, 'middle pain' because it happens in the middle of a cycle!

I wondered if any other women have experienced being gaslit about something that turned out to be a totally normal for a female body?

OP posts:
RosesAndHellebores · 21/12/2025 11:00

BlackCatDiscoClub · 21/12/2025 10:57

So, if ovulation pain was already known about by doctors, but when women reported this experience to doctors they were told it wasn't real, what would you call that?

Lack of empathy and disinterest in something that was not indicative of disease.

To be honest op, I knew which ovary was ovulating and read an article about mittelschmerz in my mid 20s, so 40 years ago. You are over-reacting here.

Noras · 21/12/2025 11:00

Child birth where having had an incredibly painful forcep delivery with a large number of stitches ( DD was stuck via her shoulder( I was expected to be up and out of the hospital and cooking dinner in a week! My in laws insisted on coming to stay one month later and also wanted a lovely lasagna - I was just about coming off the morphine.

BlackCatDiscoClub · 21/12/2025 10:58

itsthetea · 21/12/2025 10:56

Ignorance?

more it came from ignoring the accounts of women

even if half a dozen women told a doctor it was a problem the doctor would ignore these reports and that’s how ignorance about it set in

But how could doctors be ignorant about it if, as other PP have said, it was very well known about?

OP posts:
BlackCatDiscoClub · 21/12/2025 10:57

HelenaWaiting · 21/12/2025 10:52

It is also called mittelschmerz in the UK, and has been known about for decades. Also, you are using "gaslit" inappropriately.

So, if ovulation pain was already known about by doctors, but when women reported this experience to doctors they were told it wasn't real, what would you call that?

OP posts:
itsthetea · 21/12/2025 10:56

Ignorance?

more it came from ignoring the accounts of women

even if half a dozen women told a doctor it was a problem the doctor would ignore these reports and that’s how ignorance about it set in

BlackCatDiscoClub · 21/12/2025 10:55

B1anche · 21/12/2025 10:52

Surely it was coming from ignorance rather than 'gaslighting' women.

You cant call it ignorance if women are telling you something and you decide they are wrong surely?

OP posts:
HelenaWaiting · 21/12/2025 10:52

It is also called mittelschmerz in the UK, and has been known about for decades. Also, you are using "gaslit" inappropriately.

B1anche · 21/12/2025 10:52

Surely it was coming from ignorance rather than 'gaslighting' women.