To find it hard being single this time of the year

OP, I think you should widen your lens on this. It’s not just being single that can feel anomalous this time of year, it’s also anyone whose life doesn’t fit all the Christmas imagery (ads, films) that continually depicts as normal large extended families smiling around the turkey, adorable children giving their parents cute or thoughtful presents, everyone ‘going home for the holidays’ and resolving family feuds etc etc. It can be quite an emotionally coercive time of year for an awful lot of people, not just the single.

No. I read here about lazy immature drunken partners and demanding nightmare inlaws and ongoing family dramas and thank God my life is free of that shit. I can’t recommend this way of life highly enough.

I’m single this year and was thinking about this the other day. After a very long marriage and not living with a man for 11 years since my divorce, but having relationships in the meantime, this is probably only the second or third Christmas as an adult that I’m completely single.
This time last year was awful and I left my ex shortly after Christmas. It was stressful, upsetting and he was a grade A twat to me all through December. Deliberately so in order that he’d save face with his relatives and play the victim when I left him.
This year is wonderfully stressful free and it’s probably the calmest run up to Christmas I’ve ever had.
There’s something about reframing your mindset too. Be thankful you don’t have a god awful man or horrible relatives making your life difficult. Do what you want to do and try to enjoy the peace. Making plans can give you things to look forward too and if you do get lonely, check out all the poor women who aren’t single here and the awful situations they are enduring for a little perspective.

The reality of it is sadly domestic violence is at an all time high over the Xmas periods, and divorce applications are most common in January, following xmas.
forget the fuzzy adverts and fairy tale films.
Another thing to remember that for most partnerships Xmas wouldn't happen at all without the woman going above and beyond physically and mentally to ensure all family members have a nice time.
I've been on my own many times at xmas, it's a state of mind, if your determined to have a good Xmas you will.

I'd rather stay single than go through what some poor women on MN are going through.

Doing the Christmas slog solo, ungrateful DH/DPs that take them for granted, DH/DPs that get stroppy and sulky when their DW/DP gets ill or asks for a scrap of help. Who wants that at any time of year?

Its just me, my teens and my mum. No whining, mithering manchild.

Social media is carefully curated bollocks so take the picture perfect Christmasses with a pinch of salt.

Im sorry you feel this way, and I'm an anti social bugger, but I love being by myself. I holiday alone and if I was alone at Christmas i would love to close the blinds and stay in for days. We've just moved to a new town so will be exploring on foot and going to KFC. I can't wait.

I'm sorry you're struggling OP. I know it often looks like everyone is in happy little bubbles but even a quick look through MN this time of year shows you that actually a lot of people are miserably unsingle.

As a positive, you only have yourself to please, what would you like christmas to be? Are there any little treat yourself traditions that you could start to brighten up this time of year?

I think it's pretty common to feel lonely around this time of year. Maybe have a think about what it is that you are missing, exactly, and try to get it elsewhere.
I am single this year. I've had a pretty social month though, going out with friends and Christmas parties with hobby groups. I am actually looking forward to having a few quiet days over Christmas.
I don't have to think about cooking, hosting or spending a lot of money on gifts. Although, I did get a few nice bits for people I care about.
I don't really know what a relationship would add to Christmas at this point. What are you missing?

I spent a good portion of my 20s being single and I really understand what are you saying. I remember it bothered me very much - I just wanted to have that default person/place that was 'mine'. And it was not just about xmas/new years, I remember also dreading the summer holiday season - most friends 'paired up' and vacationing with their partner and I remember ending up planning holidays with acquaintances even 🤦🏼‍♀️
But just fyi, as someone who really remembers that feeling, I can tell you now in hindsight - it's really important to not waste that time forcing fake connections just for the sake of not feeling 'single' or alone...your own company is always better than fake company.