To find it hard being single this time of the year

Count your blessings. It won't always be like this.

Yes, being single at Christmas is a specific thing and your feelings around it are valid - whether you have children or not is not the issue.
I definitely hear you & understand how you feel. It's that feeling of wanting to be spoilt & looked after rather than being the one doing the spoiling and looking after.

Definitely try to spoil yourself even if it's just with a box set or a good movie xx

Wishing you a really good Christmas. It’s definitely tough when there’s so much expectation around family and having a romantic partner. I don’t know what to say except to wish you all the best.

Your assuming even if you had family they would be present and it would be enjoyable and stressful free.
Think what you've got not what you havent.
No one's life is perfect.
Some women would have loved a couple of children also.

Right now loads of women with partners are dreading the drudgery of Xmas with useless partners.

There will be loads of threads on here over the next week or so about how awful Christmas has been due to the man's moods, behaviour, selfishness, cheating, etc etc meanwhile the woman has been doing all things to make Christmas nice for everyone. And countless women out there experiencing the same who never post or have never used Mumsnet.

Worse still, the abuse ramps up for many this time of year.

Honestly OP you are not missing anything. A man who genuinely cares about a woman's inner world enough to engage equally in making Christmas nice with HER in mind ... That's a fucking unicorn.

The "good ones" are really just the bare minimum men as generally the bar resides in Hades. They're useless too, but at least less offensive, and the women are just used to it and accept it.

I do know how you feel, I used to feel the same. But then I got married, and now I'm not!

This is my first Christmas as a single woman. I got married at age 18, and I am now 51 - and I don't really know what to do with myself between Christmas and NY. I am working until Christmas Eve afternoon, and the office is closed until 5th January. I have bought some good snacks and a ham and I will probably spend the time gaining 20Ibs

Yes! This is sadly so true. Christmas and New Year was definitely an escalation in the cycle for my ex-partner. I spent probably 20 Christmas Days and New Year's Eves in despair and thinking, please let this be the last one I have to spend with him.

I'm in my 50s and came out of a very long-term abusive relationship 2 years ago. Every christmas and new year would be wrecked in one way or another by my frankly, loony ex-partner. This year, I'm happy to be experiencing a relatively stress-free christmas, but I do look at couples and long for that 'togetherness' (not that I ever had that - I hasten to add).
So you are definitely not alone, it can be a tricky time of year to navigate as a single person.
But, I can tell you now it is better to be alone, than lonely in a bad relationship.
Make sure you make plenty of plans - be the organiser. Get a group of your girl friends together for a post-christmas catch-up, reach out to friends you haven't seen for a while and see if they fancy meeting up for a drink. Enjoy your own time and space to do the things you want to do. Join some FB groups for people locally in a similar situation (there are lots!)
Good luck, christmas will soon be over and normality will resume!

That's all very well but how does it relate to the OP who clearly...

Actually I can't even be bothered to explain how tone deaf your post is.

Some of these posts on here atm have reminded me why I don’t mind being single . Partners having their Christmas parties and not coming home , discovering cheating texts after the said night out , being left to do all the hard work over Xmas whilst they sit drinking all Christmas . I remembered the other day about how my ex would start drinking from the minute he broke up from work til the night before he went back and he wouldn’t be sober . One year Xmas day , falling asleep on the toilet , drunk .

I think back to those days and although it would be nice to spend Christmas with someone the grass isn’t always greener is it ?!

i think @Cigarette is right - there is a lot of specific Christmas imagery around and if your life is not like this ( mine not entirely) you really feel it. All these Christmas films and ads …they make me a nauseous tbh and I’m not single. I have DH and DD it’s wider family angle where I don’t fit.

I also think it’s also enormous pressure for you to make everything, to be in charge of every detail, to make it perfect and there is no one who will help, share and spoil you a bit. I admire you honestly. My friend is single and it’s a lot of work all the year but at this time especially.

Christmas is a hard time of the year to be single I find, even if you are happy in that state the rest of the year.

I think it's because people start hunkering down with their family/partners and becoming less available. I certainly find that with my own friends who are all married/partnered up.

I have kids but they are late teens and are busy with their own friends etc so I find I start to miss having someone around who just wants to spend time with me and spoil me.
But then I remember how miserable Christmas was in an unhappy marriage & I think that was worse than this so I am grateful not to be in that situation.

Try to spoil yourself a bit with simple treats and maybe plan some nice things to do after Xmas.

@TheOnlySinglebut you do mean something to someone, to your children you are everything. You are the achristmas magic, so allow that to fill your soul.

I get how you feel. I’ve been single for 18 months (no kids, parents, siblings) and am spending the day solo. It’s ok - and I do have invites for Xmas day if I want to take them up - but I hate feeling like I’m third wheeling, especially when I see all the posts on here about just wanting to spend Xmas with their own little nuclear family. I was single for a decade before I met my last ex, and I liked our little christmases and our little stockings. This year I don’t even have anything to unwrap on the day which is a weird feeling, so I bought myself a much needed new winter coat. It’s not the same though.

This
There are many reasons why people don't like Christmas and I know several people who dread being together with their partner for extended periods of time

YANBU for feeling that way OP it is hard. Christmas can make everything seem worse. Have you tried the lone parents chat on here? I hope you have bought yourself a xmas gift you deserve it.

After a couple of threads I’ve read over the last two days - I’ve never been more grateful to be single!

I love the fact I can do Xmas exactly how I (and my kids want to). They are currently with their dad and I also enjoy a little respite to get ready for the chaos… it’s harder the years they are not here for xmas

Nope
I love being single
I don't have to worry about presents for in laws
Whose house to go to on xmas day
Reading all the stories of useless partners on here
No thank you

Give it 2 weeks and the dating market will be rich with fresh pickings.

So not alone then. Jeez