Page 31 | Just got shouted at in a coffee shop for coughing in public 🥴

wildgreyocean · 2025-12-20T15:47:30+00:00

I know I’m not being unreasonable here but I just need some reassurance! I was in a coffee shop after popping to the shops and got a tickle in my throat. I’ve had a cold all week but nothing too severe. I coughed and next thing I know an old man is shouting at me that I’m being selfish and should be self isolating at home, and “don’t I know the NHS is on its knees?!” AIBU to think this is a total overreaction to a cough?!

8misskitty8 · 20/12/2025 17:06

Some of these replies are surely people on the wind up !
How are these people holding down jobs if they don't go out in public due to a snuffly nose and a cough which most people get several off a year.

TonyTheImpala · 20/12/2025 17:06

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 15:57

But I’m not “still clearly ill”. I feel a lot better but know that when I’ve had a bug the cough can linger on my chest for weeks after. Am I supposed to hide away from society?

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If you’d posted as the man in this scenario you’d have most of the same posters saying entirely the opposite.

TeaAndTattoos · 20/12/2025 17:05

CalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 20/12/2025 15:54

I’d be pissed off if someone with a clear bug was coughing in a space near others. It’s selfish germ-spreading, whether you like hearing that or not. He shouldn’t be shouting though.

Edited

I have asthma and that coupled with the cold makes me cough asthma isn’t contagious and I can’t stay at home I have things to do that are more important than you and your health anxiety. Not every cough means that someone is sick.

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 17:04

The man would need to wear a hazmat suit to avoid the coughing and sniffing and germs on my bus to work in the mornings.

tirednessreigns · 20/12/2025 17:04

I think you’re getting a really bad rap on here OP. People who are that worried about colds at this time of year should be avoiding a coffee shop etc. The fact you’ve said that you’ve got a little cough doesn’t mean you have to bunker down for the remainder of the year!

Thechaseison71 · 20/12/2025 17:03

CalmTheFuckDownMargaret · 20/12/2025 15:54

I’d be pissed off if someone with a clear bug was coughing in a space near others. It’s selfish germ-spreading, whether you like hearing that or not. He shouldn’t be shouting though.

Edited

And what if you cough for another reason? Asthma for example. Or sneeze due to an allergy.

Should you isolate to not upset the neurotic?

Binus · 20/12/2025 17:02

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 16:59

I would imagine some of the staff in the coffee shop also had colds or coughs. You think they can stay at home for weeks until they stop coughing?

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Exactly. It's like some of the worst sanctimony and privileged ignorance during covid.

Imdreamingofapeacefulxmas · 20/12/2025 17:01

When I cough in public or sneeze I do really cover my mouth or face usually with my scarf and turn right away.

Artificialhens · 20/12/2025 17:01

Shouting at people is much worse than coughing.

shhblackbag · 20/12/2025 17:01

MN is off the rails about this. YANBU.

ChubRubADub · 20/12/2025 17:01

Even during Covid people were allowed out once the isolation period was past even if they were still coughing, as it was recognised that could continue for weeks.

WilfredsPies · 20/12/2025 17:00

Notmyreality · 20/12/2025 16:53

If he’s frightened he should stay home. OP
is in no way at fault. People are allowed to cough.

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Which is exactly what I just said! 🙄

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 16:59

muggart · 20/12/2025 16:56

of course it’s allowed. that’s why you did it, at the expense of others. isn’t it enough that you have a right to spread your germs in an enclosed space without needing us all to pretend that you weren’t being selfish?

just own it. you wanted a hot chocolate. the way you act when ill probably infects others along the way because you put yourself first. but you do it anyway. because you can.

why do you also need to pretend like you are doing some sort of public service or good action when you go out and about while contagious? just make peace with the fact that in your order of priority the health of strangers comes behind hot chocolate.

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I would imagine some of the staff in the coffee shop also had colds or coughs. You think they can stay at home for weeks until they stop coughing?

ChopstickNovice · 20/12/2025 16:59

XenoBitch · 20/12/2025 15:59

He should be the one who should be staying at home if his health anxiety is that bad.

People cough for all sorts of reasons. You covered your mouth, and that is enough.

This!! I have an asthmatic cough that sounds bloody awful. No one can catch asthma off me.

Celestialmoods · 20/12/2025 16:59

Covid sent some people a bit crazy. You did nothing wrong.

ChubRubADub · 20/12/2025 16:58

The grumpy old git should be grateful he’s not on my train in the morning it’s been like plague central for weeks

Original poster

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 16:57

muggart · 20/12/2025 16:56

of course it’s allowed. that’s why you did it, at the expense of others. isn’t it enough that you have a right to spread your germs in an enclosed space without needing us all to pretend that you weren’t being selfish?

just own it. you wanted a hot chocolate. the way you act when ill probably infects others along the way because you put yourself first. but you do it anyway. because you can.

why do you also need to pretend like you are doing some sort of public service or good action when you go out and about while contagious? just make peace with the fact that in your order of priority the health of strangers comes behind hot chocolate.

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“At the expense of others” this is what I can’t get behind.

I have had a cold. Because of a sinus deformity that has been largely solved by surgery, but not fully, i get post nasal drip which makes me cough for a good couple of weeks after a cold. I am not actively unwell.

OP posts:

muggart · 20/12/2025 16:56

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 16:50

No but I fancied a hot drink because I was cold and tired! That’s allowed too.

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of course it’s allowed. that’s why you did it, at the expense of others. isn’t it enough that you have a right to spread your germs in an enclosed space without needing us all to pretend that you weren’t being selfish?

just own it. you wanted a hot chocolate. the way you act when ill probably infects others along the way because you put yourself first. but you do it anyway. because you can.

why do you also need to pretend like you are doing some sort of public service or good action when you go out and about while contagious? just make peace with the fact that in your order of priority the health of strangers comes behind hot chocolate.

Buscobel · 20/12/2025 16:56

You said in your first post that you weren’t being unreasonable. Some people have agreed with you and some have disagreed. I think where I might be at odds with you, is when you said you’d go mad staying indoors. That doesn’t necessarily mean going into a stuffy warm confined space, where germs multiply.

Theres been so much talk of the flu variant this year, people are getting twitchy about it.

Notmyreality · 20/12/2025 16:54

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 16:50

No but I fancied a hot drink because I was cold and tired! That’s allowed too.

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Yes it is, ignore the idiots.

SapphireSeptember · 20/12/2025 16:54

MoserRothOrangeandAlmond · 20/12/2025 16:21

When I get a tickle in my throat it’s never a dainty cough! It leads onto a full coughing fit!
It can totally catch me off guard and I always feel embarrassed!

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Oh gosh, I've done that thing where I've swallowed a bit of saliva, it's gone down the wrong way and I have a massive coughing fit. 😅

There's some really sanctimonious people on this thread! I had a cold at the start of October (just as I was due to go into hospital for a procedure under general anesthetic.) Phoned them up to tell them, they said it's fine. I felt fine other than having a bit of a sore throat on the day I had to go in.

Binus · 20/12/2025 16:54

Aimtodobetter · 20/12/2025 16:43

Sadly I think post covid a subset of people (apparently 22 percent if this poll is accurate) have convinced themselves that they we would all be able to avoid the majority of respiratory diseases if people just stayed home every time they had any symptom. It’s obviously bonkers, not least because the diseases often spread outside the period of symptons but also because we would all be spending an insane amount of time isolating at home - but you won’t be able to convince them that these diseases are just an acceptable part of living in society.

Yep. The only way to deal with this is to keep telling them to fuck off, again and again and again.

Cornishclio · 20/12/2025 16:53

It’s winter. Lots of people have coughs and colds and sneezing and coughing. I am retired now but when working I would stay home and work from there if I could and now I avoid enclosed areas to prevent passing it on to others. The odd cough though after having a cold a week or ten days ago I would go into shops/restaurants so YANBU. If people are so concerned about catching stuff then they are free to avoid enclosed spaces. Sounds like this man has extreme health anxiety and if you covered your mouth when coughing he was out of line. His health anxiety does not trump your need to be out and about. If you were continually coughing I would say it probably wasn’t the best idea to go into shops or cafes. There is always online shopping if you are unwell.

Notmyreality · 20/12/2025 16:53

WilfredsPies · 20/12/2025 16:52

Neither of you are at fault and both of you are being silly.

In your defence, you’re quite right; it would be horrible for you to stay cooped up indoors every time you got a standard cold and part of life is catching colds. It’s impossible to go through life without catching bugs. However, he’s probably quite frightened. We’ve gone through something unprecedented in living memory where lots of us lost people. And now the news is full of hospitals being full and the flu putting people in intensive care. If he’s elderly, he’s probably frightened that catching something that sounds as nasty as coughs can do, might be what finishes him off. Fear can do things like that to people.

On the other hand, if he feels that worried about his health then it’s him who needs to make the effort to stay away from other people. Life can’t stop just because you don’t want to get ill. Unfortunately, this isn’t helped by people who do go to places knowing they’ve got something nasty and contagious, and who firmly believe that their desire to go out and socialise is greater than anyone else’s need to stay out of hospital. That because nobody has gone on tv and told them that they specifically aren’t allowed to do something, it’s perfectly ok to go and visit great aunty Ethel in her retirement home despite having early symptoms of something nasty brewing.

Try and let it go; you haven’t done anything wrong and he’s just frightened. You’ve been out for some fresh air, you’ve had a nice coffee. With any luck it’ll be gone in a few days and you can have a healthy and germ free Christmas. This man doesn’t have the power to ruin anything for you.

If he’s frightened he should stay home. OP
is in no way at fault. People are allowed to cough.

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 16:53

Bloody hell it's like covid all over again. Coughs can linger for weeks. The country would grind to a halt if we all stayed at home for weeks with a cough.