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AIBU?

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Original poster

Just got shouted at in a coffee shop for coughing in public 🥴

894 replies

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 15:47

I know I’m not being unreasonable here but I just need some reassurance! I was in a coffee shop after popping to the shops and got a tickle in my throat. I’ve had a cold all week but nothing too severe. I coughed and next thing I know an old man is shouting at me that I’m being selfish and should be self isolating at home, and “don’t I know the NHS is on its knees?!”

AIBU to think this is a total overreaction to a cough?!

OP posts:
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Lostsoultrip · 20/12/2025 17:17

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:15

"outweigh someone's need to avoid illness for Xmas."

If that was the case you'd not be out in a coffee shop, surely?!

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They're not the one who is ill though are they.

ChattyCatty25 · 20/12/2025 17:17

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:12

I didn’t cough on my hands.

As I have explained. Due to an issue with my sinuses I get post nasal drip for WEEKS after a cold. I cannot stay inside every time my sinuses flared up.

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Then you didn’t cover your mouth properly. There is absolutely nothing to stop you masking.

Your sinus issue is irrelevant, the evolutionary purpose of post viral coughs runny noses and sneezes is to spread the virus. Your sinus issue means you’re more vulnerable and find it harder to fight off respiratory infections. So you’ll shed the virus for longer.

I didn’t say you should stay inside, I said you should WEAR A MASK when contagious. Stop being selfish, it’s not hard.

GoldsolesLugs · 20/12/2025 17:17

Since the elderly cost the NHS more than anyone else, you should have told him to neck himself for the sake of the economically productive.

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:15

Lostsoultrip · 20/12/2025 17:15

Why does your desire to go to a coffee shop outweigh someone's need to avoid illness for Xmas. Your mild cold could mean someone else ends up in A&E. I'm not saying don't go out but a quick pop to a shop is very different to sitting in a coffee shop. You pass someone in a shop for a few seconds so the likelihood of passing stuff on is much less whereas sitting in a coffee shop for an hour ish (and coughing) is much more likely to spread a viral load.

I find it pretty selfish to be honest although they shouldn't have shouted at you.

"outweigh someone's need to avoid illness for Xmas."

If that was the case you'd not be out in a coffee shop, surely?!

OP posts:
Lostsoultrip · 20/12/2025 17:15

Why does your desire to go to a coffee shop outweigh someone's need to avoid illness for Xmas. Your mild cold could mean someone else ends up in A&E. I'm not saying don't go out but a quick pop to a shop is very different to sitting in a coffee shop. You pass someone in a shop for a few seconds so the likelihood of passing stuff on is much less whereas sitting in a coffee shop for an hour ish (and coughing) is much more likely to spread a viral load.

I find it pretty selfish to be honest although they shouldn't have shouted at you.

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:15

IridiumSky · 20/12/2025 17:13

What school was that? Bash Street?

Disgusting.

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It’s disgusting to cover your mouth? New one.

OP posts:
XenoBitch · 20/12/2025 17:14

muggart · 20/12/2025 16:46

well i think this shows how you actually think. you want your hot chocolate, screw everyone else. You’re entitled to that attitude but you can’t stop others from thinking that you are selfish and gross.

many people will silently judge you and agree with the old man, although they may not say it. You have no right to not be judged.

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But the old man can have his hot chocolate and shout at women sitting on their own. OP is not the unreasonable one here.

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:14

Ubertomusic · 20/12/2025 17:13

Same. And I got shouted at for my asthmatic cough.

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Reminds me of the time my dad got shouted at by a man in a plane queue just after the pandemic. My dad has COPD and coughs very badly. This man lost his mind at my dad for coughing and “not caring” about the pandemic. My dad just laughed in his face and said if he cared so much, he’d not be getting on a flight.

OP posts:
AorticValve · 20/12/2025 17:14

ChattyCatty25 · 20/12/2025 17:11

YABU. You’re at the end of a cold, and your “lingering coughs” mean you are still shedding the virus. You were being ignorant.

If you covered your mouth, that means you coughed on your hands and are spreading your cold virus everywhere.

If you go out when ill (and yes if you’re still coughing, you’re still contagious), you should wear a mask, cough inside your shirt, and wash your hands after they go near your nose or mouth.

It’s unrealistic to isolate for every illness, but it’s selfish and ignorant to not take these basic measures to avoid unnecessary spread.

Don't be ridiculous. I have a lingering tickly cough for at least a month, sometimes 3 after pretty much every cold I ever cold. I would never leave the house if I applied your draconian rules.

IridiumSky · 20/12/2025 17:13

wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:08

I don't tend to carry tissues with me (which to be fair, I should, because of my sinus issues. But I never have because they're stupidly expensive for a little plastic thing full of paper). I lifted the inside of my elbow to my mouth, as I was always taught to do as a child at school, and coughed into it. I'm not exactly going around rubbing the inside of my arm against things!

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What school was that? Bash Street?

Disgusting.

Ubertomusic · 20/12/2025 17:13

ChopstickNovice · 20/12/2025 16:59

This!! I have an asthmatic cough that sounds bloody awful. No one can catch asthma off me.

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Same. And I got shouted at for my asthmatic cough.

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:12

ChattyCatty25 · 20/12/2025 17:11

YABU. You’re at the end of a cold, and your “lingering coughs” mean you are still shedding the virus. You were being ignorant.

If you covered your mouth, that means you coughed on your hands and are spreading your cold virus everywhere.

If you go out when ill (and yes if you’re still coughing, you’re still contagious), you should wear a mask, cough inside your shirt, and wash your hands after they go near your nose or mouth.

It’s unrealistic to isolate for every illness, but it’s selfish and ignorant to not take these basic measures to avoid unnecessary spread.

I didn’t cough on my hands.

As I have explained. Due to an issue with my sinuses I get post nasal drip for WEEKS after a cold. I cannot stay inside every time my sinuses flared up.

OP posts:
Thechaseison71 · 20/12/2025 17:12

ChattyCatty25 · 20/12/2025 17:11

YABU. You’re at the end of a cold, and your “lingering coughs” mean you are still shedding the virus. You were being ignorant.

If you covered your mouth, that means you coughed on your hands and are spreading your cold virus everywhere.

If you go out when ill (and yes if you’re still coughing, you’re still contagious), you should wear a mask, cough inside your shirt, and wash your hands after they go near your nose or mouth.

It’s unrealistic to isolate for every illness, but it’s selfish and ignorant to not take these basic measures to avoid unnecessary spread.

She coughed into her elbow. Unless she's rubbing the inside of her elbow around it's unlikely

DinoLil · 20/12/2025 17:12

I do and find that is a 'yeah, that shut you up' reply to most things. How do you even know it's a cold, or the flu or Covid or pneumonia or just an allergy to the cleaning products?

You wouldn't go out if you were poorly. People are very dramatic.

JuliesName · 20/12/2025 17:11

He was being ridiculous! I don't personally think it's fair to go out to unnecessary places when you have something contagious, just to stop anyone else getting it. I think there's a difference between self isolating and not leaving the house - not possible - and going to more other places out of choice where you could infect people, especially a few days before Christmas. But I wouldn't say anything to you or anyone about it.

ChattyCatty25 · 20/12/2025 17:11

YABU. You’re at the end of a cold, and your “lingering coughs” mean you are still shedding the virus. You were being ignorant.

If you covered your mouth, that means you coughed on your hands and are spreading your cold virus everywhere.

If you go out when ill (and yes if you’re still coughing, you’re still contagious), you should wear a mask, cough inside your shirt, and wash your hands after they go near your nose or mouth.

It’s unrealistic to isolate for every illness, but it’s selfish and ignorant to not take these basic measures to avoid unnecessary spread.

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 17:10

muggart · 20/12/2025 17:07

no, because they are at work and need to pay bills.

but many people happily go about infecting others for no reason other than “life doesn’t stop when you have a cold”.

Ive had people come to meet my 2 week old baby with a cold (yes, baby caught it) and meet me for lunch with a cold and even had a professional acquaintance at a conference dive in to kiss me on the cheek when he was disgustingly snotty and ill. It’s that kind of pointless infecting that we can easily cut down on as a society. it’s rude, it’s gross, and it’s not comparable to people who have to work through illness.

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Life doesn't stop when you have a cold though.

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:09

muggart · 20/12/2025 17:07

no, because they are at work and need to pay bills.

but many people happily go about infecting others for no reason other than “life doesn’t stop when you have a cold”.

Ive had people come to meet my 2 week old baby with a cold (yes, baby caught it) and meet me for lunch with a cold and even had a professional acquaintance at a conference dive in to kiss me on the cheek when he was disgustingly snotty and ill. It’s that kind of pointless infecting that we can easily cut down on as a society. it’s rude, it’s gross, and it’s not comparable to people who have to work through illness.

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many people happily go about infecting others for no reason other than “life doesn’t stop when you have a cold”

I don’t know how many more times I can explain that I am no longer actively unwell, but that due to a physical issue with my sinuses I get post viral coughs.

OP posts:
DinoLil · 20/12/2025 17:09

I have asthma, Old Man. Don't worry, it's not catching.

Thechaseison71 · 20/12/2025 17:08

Devonshiregal · 20/12/2025 16:29

Erm yeah it can. Why does your inability to sit on the sofa watching Netflix trump other people’s desire to not get your cold. Not like you were running the coffee shop - your livelihood was not at risk if you didn’t sit there spreading your germs. And I’m sure the staff at the coffee shop loved having to handle your virus covered cup.

Your cough was probably an obvious ‘active cold cough’ and that’s why he was bothered. However, no, he shouldn’t have said anything. Assuming you’re in uk…the rule is you sit hating on people quietly. And I’m sure that’s what the rest of the room was doing.

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I assume your employer is fine with you sitting watching Netflix if you have a sniffle. Meanwhile others need to work. Get real

Original poster
wildgreyocean · 20/12/2025 17:08

IridiumSky · 20/12/2025 17:06

You ‘covered your mouth with your elbow.’?

that’s absolutely fine then, so long as you then screwed up your elbow and put it in the bin.

I don't tend to carry tissues with me (which to be fair, I should, because of my sinus issues. But I never have because they're stupidly expensive for a little plastic thing full of paper). I lifted the inside of my elbow to my mouth, as I was always taught to do as a child at school, and coughed into it. I'm not exactly going around rubbing the inside of my arm against things!

OP posts:
Owlsareus · 20/12/2025 17:08

For all he knows you could be on treatment for cancer that causes issue with throat clearing , what a selfish nasty man

muggart · 20/12/2025 17:07

EchoedSilence · 20/12/2025 16:59

I would imagine some of the staff in the coffee shop also had colds or coughs. You think they can stay at home for weeks until they stop coughing?

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no, because they are at work and need to pay bills.

but many people happily go about infecting others for no reason other than “life doesn’t stop when you have a cold”.

Ive had people come to meet my 2 week old baby with a cold (yes, baby caught it) and meet me for lunch with a cold and even had a professional acquaintance at a conference dive in to kiss me on the cheek when he was disgustingly snotty and ill. It’s that kind of pointless infecting that we can easily cut down on as a society. it’s rude, it’s gross, and it’s not comparable to people who have to work through illness.

FOJN · 20/12/2025 17:07

LittleAlexHornesPocket · 20/12/2025 16:24

Some of the posts on here make me think we've gone back in time to 2020.

Some of you need serious help with your health anxiety.

I'm not sure it health anxiety in all cases, I think there a quite a few people who like the opportunity to finger wag. It's all a bit ridiculous.

IridiumSky · 20/12/2025 17:06

You ‘covered your mouth with your elbow.’?

that’s absolutely fine then, so long as you then screwed up your elbow and put it in the bin.

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