I just wish people would stop sending me Christmas cards

dont you feel guilty?

Ive never done cards like that, except for the Neighbours where I thibk it’s expected

Me neither. Straight into recycling.

I think we are down to the last handful and most of those are ghastly corporate ones

I kind of feel this way about birthday cards too. My sent this years 3 days late. My birthday is mid December so with all the Christmas stuff out, I don’t like the cards staying out for long as it feels too cluttered. By the time hers arrived it pretty much went straight into the recycling bin. A total waste of everything really.

The neighbour who sends me a card - I rarely see him. He has caring duties away from home. He puts a card through my door and I put one back - back in the day when I had a busy job you would get a card from everyone you worked with. Now I get one from a neighbour and two from family - and that's pretty much it

If he didn't send me a card I wouldn't send one back

I send them because I like doing it. I like receiving them too but I don’t mind if I don’t. For charities, it’s not just a tangible donation, it also raises awareness and for many small charities it is a Christmas activity for their users

Yes, this is what I think about most of Christmas, birthdays etc. I do presents for my own children and family members. At work though I decided not to when I managed a team. In my experience the men in teams would usually just not bother and I think, honestly, that's right - it just adds to the workload for no real reason. Of course, it is lovely when you receive a work birthday gift but it's really not necessary.

With cards I don't do them now but will drop one in to my elderly neighbour as I think in that case it is a nice thing to do. I won't be sending any though.

I dont like them, but reading some posts here I realise they bring happiness to some which is always a good thing

I’ve not sent cards for many many years now. It’s so outdated, meaningless and a waste of paper in my opinion. I’d imagine most people who get them do as I do and put them straight into the recycling bin. It’s even worse when I get them from a neighbour. Easier, surely to just wish happy Christmas face to face ?

@Roobarbtwo thank you roobarb xx❤️❤️

We used to send cards to those relatives that you probably only see at funerals but since they have had their own funeral now, less get sent.

laughing at grateful 🙄

there’s a middle ground between “grateful” and “I don’t even open them” which seems rather…performative.

the thing with texts is you can send and receive literally dozens in any ten minute period. They require zero thought and effort.

Buying cards, going to post office to buy stamps, writing cards, looking up addresses, getting to a post box etc pretty much requires a gant chart.

I think it's because my brother always gets me a card so I get him one back - his cards are nice and he's funny in his message - so I do look forward to getting them

Thank you. I had to move house in 2020. Not my choice. My flat was being demolished - had to be sold and I got peanuts for it - flats in the specific area of my town weren't worth very much but I gave my brother 100 pounds in his card that year - he's very good to me in a lot of ways and it was the first time in a while that I could make a gesture like that

He always gets me a card so that's why I try and get him one back but don't always manage it. One year I tried to get him one in morrison but the brother cards were rotten and I didn't bother.

He was fine with it. You have a nice Christmas too

I disagree with the OP’s ‘working class’ dig, but I do think giving a card to someone you see at Christmas and can say Merry Christmas to in person is odd. Always have, even in the days I wrote cards, so I’ve never done it. It’s nothing to do with feeling grateful (or not) for the person

Like I’ve said, not liking cards and not liking Christmas/not being generous are diffferent things. Scrooge wasn’t in trouble for not sending a colleague from the job before last a Christmas card.

You know what is coming OP...

I am working class. And proud of it. Im quite happy to give my mum a card - and presents - because she had melanoma in 2017 - and I'm very lucky still to have her

I don't say dear mum at Christmas. I've bought her a card - actually not a Christmas card - because the shop I bought them from ran out of them - so I bought her a generic one instead

I'm not obsessed with cards BTW. As I said earlier I can be a tad disorganised and there have been times where I have given no cards and just the presents to my mum and brother

I make all my Christmas cards and I hope the recipients feel like you 😔

I once had to pay the postage on a card my gran had forgotten to put a stamp on. The guy at the sorting office asked whether I actually wanted to pay, given that it was past Christmas and he could
just bin it, but I felt bad about that so paid the postage and extra charge and then there was £20 inside, happy days.

You need friends and family who can write messages

Yes why would you send a card to someone you don't speak to?

What I do actually is put a generic message on FB with a Christmassy pic from my life (my tree, my food prep!) and wish everyone a merry Christmas. And no I don't say "I'm not sending cards so have donated to xyz charity".

If people message on the pic I reply.

There are some people not on SM that I want to wish well and I email or text them.

And yunno, I keep in touch with people as the year rolls round. I message them, I call round and chat to them, I go for a coffee or a meal. I don't need to follow that up with a signed folded piece of cardboard.

If literally all you do in your relationship with someone is exchange a piece of card with your name on once a year, I really think that connection is dead and done. I recall when I drastically cut my cards list, saying to DH that I wasn't going to send a card to his cousin whom I would not know if they walked in the room (see? wifework) and he said "well you might not get one from them then" - totally fine!

You need friends and family who can write messages

i think I’d feel quite sad if I had no Christmas cards to put up - they make the place look lovely.

We have a big Christmas party mid December and virtually everyone brings a card which is lovely and then I probably receive another 15-20 in the post, from far flung friends and relatives.

I give about 20-30 in return - every year I try to be a bit more organised and ensure that I write them early enough that they actually have meaningful messages in.

I’m sure they’ll die out in the next decade - much like letters and postcards. But as someone who has lots of money and little time and whose friends fall into the same category, hand written hand posted correspondence feels like the last bastion of thoughtfulness.

I only got one this year and haven't sent one in years

But, we have got 5 new sets of neighbours this year so I have sent one to everyone on the street then we all might get to know each other a bit