Feel a bit weird about what my cleaner did.

I feel so conflicted about this one and I see why OP posted. The cleaner likes the house and admires OP’s style which is kind of flattering. She probably has a little fantasy that it’s hers, and maybe is having a rough time. I do feel sorry for someone if they need the validation of lots of likes on social media to feel better about their situation. That’s not that uncommon and people do nick random photos off the internet and pretend it’s their life. She may not see much difference between that and what she’s done.

But underneath all that it just feels like such a massive violation of privacy and demonstrating a lack of boundaries. This isn’t a random pic stolen off Rightmove. It’s OP’s life and OP is a person that the cleaner knows well. All very unsettling and wrong. I don’t know what I’d do.

It could be the reason she said they were her decorations so as to not give away OPs address etc…

My cleaner has been with me for a few years. She’s a very nice woman, but can be a bit sensitive (if I give any feedback/ask for her to change something she does etc. she doesn’t take it well). I trust her- she has her own set of keys for my house, knows the alarm code etc. Good relationship overall- if I’m home when she’s here I’ll make us both coffee and we’ll chat.

She came on Monday for her usual cleaning appointment. I put my Christmas decorations up last weekend and she was very complimentary of them, asking where I got various bits etc. To be fair, I do go a bit OTT and love Christmas and this year’s decorations turned out especially well- I make a lot of stuff myself, and also have been collecting bits for years. We had coffee and then I needed to go out so we said our goodbyes, and I left her to it.

She lives about eight miles away from me, but we’re in the same area.

Today, I went onto Facebook and a post from a local group I’m in came up. It was a photo of someone showing off their Christmas decorations- I had to do a double take because it was my house! Pictures of my living room, hallway, landing, and sitting room, all decked out for Christmas. They were posted by my cleaner (under her own name- we’re not FB friends but both members of this group). The caption is along the lines of “not bad for a tired mum of three” and there are a few thousand likes and a several hundred comments (it’s a very big group). Lots asking where she got various items from and she’s replying, based on her asking me the same thing on Monday! In one comment she didn’t know where something was from and replied “I’ve had that for years, it was originally my Nan’s” 😮 (about a candle holder I got in Next c. 2019!!)

When I first saw it, I was a bit perplexed but didn’t dwell. Now that it’s sunk in, I’m a bit pissed off. My home isn’t instantly recognisable to strangers based on those photos, it does feel like a breach of privacy.

As I said, she can be quite sensitive so even saying this to her gently will likely result in her getting upset, and likely not coming to clean for me again. I can get another cleaner, but I don’t really want things to end this way as I’ve been happy with her until now.

In my shoes, would you be annoyed?

AIBU to be annoyed?

What'll she do next? Give out your address and share photos of your valuables?

Sack her. No second chances after behaving like this.

They’re the Oko baubles from Nkuku in the large size. I ordered straight from the Nkuku website.

They seem to have a few colours discounted currently.

https://www.nkuku.com/products/oko-giant-bauble-matt-bordeaux

My cleaner has been with me for a few years. She’s a very nice woman, but can be a bit sensitive (if I give any feedback/ask for her to change something she does etc. she doesn’t take it well). I trust her- she has her own set of keys for my house, knows the alarm code etc. Good relationship overall- if I’m home when she’s here I’ll make us both coffee and we’ll chat.

She came on Monday for her usual cleaning appointment. I put my Christmas decorations up last weekend and she was very complimentary of them, asking where I got various bits etc. To be fair, I do go a bit OTT and love Christmas and this year’s decorations turned out especially well- I make a lot of stuff myself, and also have been collecting bits for years. We had coffee and then I needed to go out so we said our goodbyes, and I left her to it.

She lives about eight miles away from me, but we’re in the same area.

Today, I went onto Facebook and a post from a local group I’m in came up. It was a photo of someone showing off their Christmas decorations- I had to do a double take because it was my house! Pictures of my living room, hallway, landing, and sitting room, all decked out for Christmas. They were posted by my cleaner (under her own name- we’re not FB friends but both members of this group). The caption is along the lines of “not bad for a tired mum of three” and there are a few thousand likes and a several hundred comments (it’s a very big group). Lots asking where she got various items from and she’s replying, based on her asking me the same thing on Monday! In one comment she didn’t know where something was from and replied “I’ve had that for years, it was originally my Nan’s” 😮 (about a candle holder I got in Next c. 2019!!)

When I first saw it, I was a bit perplexed but didn’t dwell. Now that it’s sunk in, I’m a bit pissed off. My home isn’t instantly recognisable to strangers based on those photos, it does feel like a breach of privacy.

As I said, she can be quite sensitive so even saying this to her gently will likely result in her getting upset, and likely not coming to clean for me again. I can get another cleaner, but I don’t really want things to end this way as I’ve been happy with her until now.

In my shoes, would you be annoyed?

AIBU to be annoyed?

No, twice now you’ve made horrible comments towards me. You’re rude and your “jokes” are not funny.

Jesus Christ where’s the compassion?? The woman is clearly living out a little fantasy of living in a situation she could only dream of and you all want to add to that inequality by firing her at Xmas without as much as a conversation. Doesn’t mean she is wearing your bloody clothes or pawning your jewellery. Only people that already know you will be any the wiser and they aren’t casing your gaff. It means she envies your life. Compassion is dead in this country, it’s really sad.

Jesus Christ where’s the compassion?? The woman is clearly living out a little fantasy of living in a situation she could only dream of and you all want to add to that inequality by firing her at Xmas without as much as a conversation. Doesn’t mean she is wearing your bloody clothes or pawning your jewellery. Only people that already know you will be any the wiser and they aren’t casing your gaff. It means she envies your life. Compassion is dead in this country, it’s really sad.

Jesus Christ where’s the compassion?? The woman is clearly living out a little fantasy of living in a situation she could only dream of and you all want to add to that inequality by firing her at Xmas without as much as a conversation. Doesn’t mean she is wearing your bloody clothes or pawning your jewellery. Only people that already know you will be any the wiser and they aren’t casing your gaff. It means she envies your life. Compassion is dead in this country, it’s really sad.

Crazy stalker. Are you trying to take over the OPs identity?