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Original poster

Would you help adult DC to go on holiday for friend's 30th?

136 replies

needtowashthefloor · 19/12/2025 12:37

My DD is 26, works full time and bought her first house earlier this year. I know money is tight for her but she is fully financially independent from me. I actually think it's good for her to not have much (and have told her as much) at least once in her life so I don't bail her out, although I do occasionally take her out for lunch etc.
One of her friends from uni turns 30 next year and the friend has invited their uni friend group (about six girls) to go on a holiday abroad to celebrate. DD wants to go but is worried about how she is going to afford it. If you had the means, would you help to allow her to go? She has never been on holiday with the whole group, only a couple of holidays with one or two of her friends at a time.

OP posts:
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suburberphobe · 08/01/2026 18:33

No. I wouldn't.

She made her choice.

Sorry you are going through this OP.

FollowSpot · 08/01/2026 18:33

If I had the means, YES! Happily.

Generosity is as an important example to set as thrift. She has done very well to be able to buy a house at 26 so is obviously hard working and conscientious.

Tresd · 08/01/2026 18:28

Yes for sure

DisforDarkChocolate · 08/01/2026 18:28

Yes. I have.

3Dprintedfabric · 08/01/2026 18:26

Good friends are worth their weight in gold !

Ensure that she buys travel insurance

I would give her some money towards the holiday for her birthday / Christmas

She has time to save up too

whistlesandbells · 08/01/2026 17:47

Yes I would.

Owl55 · 08/01/2026 17:42

Yes

Ritasueandbobtoo9 · 20/12/2025 09:41

Yes, Christmas, birthday or pay back over time if not able to give entirely.

Fangisnotacoward · 20/12/2025 09:33

If i could afford to, I would. Sounds like shes sensible with money. Managed to buy her own place which is no mean feat these days and must have taken a lot of saving a sacrifice.

If I had the money to allow her to let her hair down and have some fun with her mates amongst all the bills and daily grind, I absolutely would.

Wonderwall23 · 20/12/2025 09:32

I'm not sure what harm doing this for her can possibly do? She's not going to suddenly become terrible with money and reliant on handouts because you've done a nice thing as a one off.

I imagine you were keen for your daughter to be a hard worker, financially responsible and able to provide for herself. So I would say congratulations...you/she has achieved that. There's no reason to hold back on treating her now if you can afford to. To be honest I'd probably say you could do it a bit more!

Member984815 · 20/12/2025 09:21

Soashamed60 · 20/12/2025 00:17

That's a bit irrelevsnt. She has the house now; and good fot her buying one before ownibg your own home becomes even more out of reach.

Show quote history

Bought my first home at 20, no regrets about lost time living carefree.. I'd do it all again.

Soashamed60 · 20/12/2025 00:19

Yes I would help.out my adult dc in this situation op

Soashamed60 · 20/12/2025 00:17

TheCosyViewer · 19/12/2025 12:59

26 is very young to have bought a house. Maybe it would have been wiser to have a fun, care-free few years first.

That's a bit irrelevsnt. She has the house now; and good fot her buying one before ownibg your own home becomes even more out of reach.

Abitofapain · 19/12/2025 23:00

I might make a contribution but I’d expect my adult kids to fun their own holidays.

Endorewitch · 19/12/2025 22:55

Of course I would. Would be glad to.

bonquiqui · 19/12/2025 22:53

Considering the thread on here last week from the parents of an entitled 26 year old that had never left home and held parties where she let her friends smash the place up and vomit on the carpet and didn’t bother cleaning it up, I think you should be very proud of your hard working daughter and helping her out with this would be a lovely thing to do

ThePlatypusAlwaysTriumphs · 19/12/2025 22:49

I would, totally

Loveatortie · 19/12/2025 22:47

Yes

ChrisMartinsKisskam · 19/12/2025 22:43

Yes I often give my son cash to do nice stuff
I’ve paid for a holiday for him and his partner to join me a few months ago abroad and we had a fab time

I regularly give him some cash like £100 -£150 if he is going away for a weekend

he had an unexpected big bill for his car earlier in the year and I gave him 90 percent of the bill

they are planning a big holiday next year and I have already put aside £500 to give them and will probably be a bit more by the time they go

I rarely give him 100 percent of something but I nearly always give him something if he his going somewhere or doing something and he never ever asks

everdine · 19/12/2025 22:13

Times really have changed!

I would contribute but if she wanted to go she would need to pay the majority!

Wayk · 19/12/2025 22:06

I would no problem.

Magsbd · 19/12/2025 19:45

Yes

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 19/12/2025 17:26

Yep, I would. My parents were never in a position to treat me, I think it would be a nice thing to do.

YouBelongWithMe · 19/12/2025 17:25

Bloody hell, yes.

Purplewarrior · 19/12/2025 17:24

Berlinlover · 19/12/2025 16:28

No I wouldn’t. A grown adult should be embarrassed to take money from their parents unless they are going to pay it back.

Why?

If the parent is far wealthier and wants to treat their DC. Why shouldn’t they?