To tell them to F*** off and quit before the Christmas break?

Sounds like where I used to work . Look for a job in a school nursery or charity run pre school. I would never work in a private day nursery again as much as I loved the children.

Well if you all don’t go in what can they really do? They can’t sack you all lol

I think that could be viewed as a Coercive threat.

Follow @Pherian's excellent advice.
Contact ACAS for advice.
Get it all down on paper or text.
Screenshot everything.

Leave and then name and shame them, so many of the big chains are like this

Don’t leave, instead - tell them you won’t be able to attend on your day off as you already have plans. Then don’t show up to this event and see if they fire you. If they call you in and give you a verbal warning - then you need to write up the conversation and email it back to them to confirm the statements. Keep everything you say or write factual and not emotional.

Someone mentioned warning them about taking them to a tribunal. Absolutely do not do that, if you threaten them and they dismiss you and you do try and take them to a tribunal - it’s unlikely to go forward. Do not threaten them with anything. Going to a tribunal takes a long time. The process is lengthy and complex. If you think this is an avenue you would want to go down make sure you get legal advice. There have been changes in this process and if they feel your claim is vexatious it can be dismissed. If they feel you are unlikely to be successful- you can be asked to pay fees for the process upfront. It’s not the case of filing some paperwork and then you get to cry in front of a judge to get a pay award. Doesn’t work like that. It’s administrative law - it’s all paperwork - you’ll be asked for tons of it to back up any claim you make. Hence documentation of any warnings or communication. Threatening them would likely plant you in the vexatious zone and you would be dismissed. Writing crazy emails full of feelings and threats about tribunals is not going to help you in anyway shape or form. Do not follow that silly advice please.

If you want to leave, then leave on good terms. Thank them for the opportunity to work there. Don’t write anything about why you’re leaving. Simply advise you’re leaving and when. Follow their policy for the notice period. There are plenty of roles out there in the care sector that would love to have someone that is hard working and cares about the people they are providing care for. Those companies are going to check references though - and it’s better to just be the bigger person and leave on good terms so you have a good reference, than having to defend your character later on.

If you're at the point of quitting then just don't go tomorrow (today, sorry), tell them why, and see what happens. I'd let colleagues you trust know you're not going so if they make the same decision there's solidarity in numbers.

Just check your contract - although I would guess any requirement to work extra will use the word 'reasonable', which dictating to you four days beforehand isn't.

I just wouldn't go and see if they actually sack me. And pull them up on it if they did try while applying for other jobs.

Would it depend on the contract you’re on? When was a teacher, we had to attend, unpaid, on the Saturday Christmas market they did. We didn’t get a choice but as a teacher, this is always the case.

What does your contract say?

Women are too agreeable which is why this shit goes on in women dominated industries
This 100%
Even in local authorities where there is power mad male manager and the team is females working with a vulnerable client group so much shit gets pushed under the carpet. It happens everywhere

I hope you didn’t go. They can’t discipline you for a rule that doesn’t exist

I'd be walking asap. Most nurseries are crying out for staff. I'm sure you'd find something quickly, even if you do bank work to start with to bridge the gap. It's appalling to treat people in that way.

They are completely unhinged to expect this. Don’t go.

Women are too agreeable which is why this shit goes on in women dominated industries.

Have you got a notice period? One nursery I worked at updated to a compulsory 3 month notice period. Luckily I never signed it (deliberately), and they didn't notice, so I was on one month - but you need to be careful of the notice in the contract as it may affect references etc.

I personally wouldn’t go tomorrow and let them try and discipline you, I would then tell them you are taking them to court. Get out of there but don’t let them get away with tomorrow

Just don’t go! If they sack you, take them to a tribunal.

They sound awful and don't have a right to expect you to work for nothing for a charity event at very short notice and just before Christmas. However I, personally, would not give them any opportunity to give a bad reference. Be 'too ill' to attend at the weekend then look for a new job in the New Year. It is their own fault if they look bad if few people turn up for this event. People on the minimum wage should not be put in this position. They work long tiring hours for little pay, doing jobs like child care which enable othe people to go to work. They need their time off or properly paid for any extra they do. You are right,bothered are plenty of care type jobs out there. Don't work for nothing at this event, don't give them any opportunity to block your chances with a bad reference and try for a job where you'll be treat better in the new year. 💐

Don't go to the event but don't resign. Call their bluff and see if they sack you.....then claim unfair dissmissal.

Is it in your CoE to be expected to attend such events unpaid? Not even sure if they could state such a thing?

As others have said, don't attend. See if they terminate your employment. Or, send them a resignation email this evening, but still don't attend tomorrow.

What CFs they are.

Leave, so many lovely childcare facilities looking for staff.

Update on nightmare neighbour....
He's been warned, denied but worker said "seen and heard the evidence"
I have her removed daily but police still doing nothing (restraining order in place) but past 2 days since council visit all is quiet!
I want to thank each and every peron on advice and support! You've all been amazing when I want a rant

I even managed to go and get a haircut and my nails done (I do nails myself and hair was last cut 3yr ago!)
Sounds silly but to me it's a huge achievement.... I managed to put my bin out to be emptied so me going outside is a big deal

Not a chance I would go 🤣 it's the crappy attitudes of manager Luke this that I can't stand
Like you've said, if it was asked of you Instead of demanded, I would be a lot more likely to help on my day off
Stuff them, I hope noone goes

This is so true. These Private Nurseries do not as a rule care for their staff, pay pittance, try to maximise profits to the detriment of the children who attend and the poor staff.

You have the perfect opportunity at this charity do.

Take the microphone and go 'Id just like to make a toast to the organisers tonight. Our employers Steve and Barbara. A couple of odious toads whom are frankly, the worst people I've ever had the misfortune to work for. They even threatened their employees with disciplinaries if they didn't come in today on their day off. Incase it wasn't clear, stick your job right up your tightfisted, narcissistic, fake, hairy arse cracks! Merry Christmas!'. Mike drop.

Life is short! On your deathbed you'll look back on it with joy. Stand up to the bullies. Let everyone know what pricks they are.

The fucking GALL of your employer. I am furious on your behalf. Definitely do not attend, and yes it may be more strategic to let them sack you.