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AIBU?

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If money was no object, would you live alone?

215 replies

SantiagoShaming · 18/12/2025 16:34

I love DP, but I also always loved living alone. We ended up living together because it makes economic sense, but having had this debate with a few female friends recently, almost all of us said we would actually prefer living alone and having two homes if money wasn’t an issue—even the married ones!

Plenty of research exists to show men are better off when living with women and women don’t benefit in the same way by living with men. Just interested in opinions. For me, it’s mostly about knowing the place will be beautiful, quiet, tidy, clean and that I can be alone if I want.

OP posts:
Zigazagbox · 18/12/2025 17:09

No, I’ve lived alone before and I don’t enjoy it in the long term.
I think living together but having enough room to each have your own dedicated space is ideal.

Enigma54 · 18/12/2025 17:08

No. I have cancer and have had a rough time of things with chemo side effects. DP ( who has his own health issues) has done a grand job of looking after me
( making my tea, fetching drinks, topping up my hot water bottle). If money were no object and I was in good health, I still wouldn’t want to live alone. My family are miles away and many friends and colleagues have withdrawn their support, at this frankly god awful time.

Happyjoe · 18/12/2025 17:08

muddyford · 18/12/2025 17:07

Yes. I could put DH in a gorgeous care home and live in an equally gorgeous bungalow nearby. After nearly three years of caring I am knackered.

I hope you get all you can to help you, respite care etc. It's flipping hard work what you're doing, kudos to you.

Beatrees · 18/12/2025 17:08

Yes definitely

Happyjoe · 18/12/2025 17:07

Always said I won the lotto, we'd build two houses next to each other! So yes, would for sure. The other half is the same, we like our own company, even though we get on fine most of the time.

But, I know he wouldn't look after himself. He's away 5 days a week at the mo, sorting out his late fathers house. He's eating microwave meals and kebabs, having cooked properly twice in 5 months and only because I sent him back with the ingredients..

muddyford · 18/12/2025 17:07

Yes. I could put DH in a gorgeous care home and live in an equally gorgeous bungalow nearby. After nearly three years of caring I am knackered.

Mangelwurzelfortea · 18/12/2025 17:07

Money very much is an object but I do live alone (well, with my kids and pets but no man) and that is the way it will stay now.

SantiagoShaming · 18/12/2025 17:06

@WallaceinAnderland You’re absolutely right! That would be a wonderful solution.

I understand the perspective that living alone is only appealing because it’s a novelty but while we’ve been together a long time, he was in the military for half of it.

Older women are far less likely to rush to live with a man again after a relationship ends for whatever reason. When my stepmother died, my father was remarried inside a year, for example. I wonder if the traditional setup just doesn’t work as well now women are their own breadwinners.

OP posts:
Beautifulbutterfly · 18/12/2025 17:05

Yep - I live alone with my two daughters. You couldn’t pay me to live with a man. I love my own space!

EasternStandard · 18/12/2025 17:04

No I’d be happy to have my family with me

Strictlycomeparent · 18/12/2025 17:03

No

Gallowayan · 18/12/2025 17:03

No.

kittywittyandpretty · 18/12/2025 17:02

I love it with my children, not completely alone

HowardTJMoon · 18/12/2025 17:02

I live alone. It's delightful.

MyMilchick · 18/12/2025 17:01

No, I love living with DH, as corny as it sounds we do really work as a team and have the same level of tidy/cleanliness standards. Again with the corniness I would hate to not have him there next to me on the couch in the evenings. Don't get me wrong, I like the odd night to myself every now and again but generally speaking I want him around.

WallaceinAnderland · 18/12/2025 17:00

This is why you need a mansion OP. He can have his library with medieval armour and you can have your sunny sitting room in pretty fabrics. His bathroom can be in the west wing where you'll never hear his shower music.

whstarainyevening · 18/12/2025 17:00

No

I lived alone for ages. I do think a lot of posters reply in the affirmative because to them, having the house to themselves is a novelty. Like when I visit London, I think it’s amazing but if I actually lived there and the astronomical costs and the traffic and the reality of it would hit me hard.

I also feel nervy and tense at night without DH around.

BigSkies2022 · 18/12/2025 17:00

No. We have plenty of space and are considerate of each other, including needs to be alone and mooch about without talking. But life is 1000% better living together.

porridgeforbrekkie · 18/12/2025 17:00

Absolutely! Would probably end up sleeping over a few times a week but yes, I’d much prefer to have my own cozy, tidy home to retreat (in silence) to.

I think Charles and Camilla do this? They have their separate residences and lives because it’s just easier. Apparently one of them is a clean freak and the other isn’t too.

SantiagoShaming · 18/12/2025 16:58

It’s not because I don’t love DP and I really do enjoy him being around! Tbh, we’re not even ‘forced’ to live together because we could each afford our own places, it would just mean us each spending about an extra 1500 a month unnecessarily.

He does nothing egregious, no LTB behaviour, I would just love to live in a beautiful, quiet home with gorgeous fabrics! Honestly, his worst offences are a need to listen to loud, fast, thrashy music while in the shower in the mornings to wake himself up, that godawful snorting thing that so many men do, leaving his socks around, dropping crumbs and his unfortunate taste in aesthetics. If he had his druthers, we’d have swords and flags and Medieval armour on the walls and I hate it.

I’ve always enjoyed my own company. With DC at uni abroad I admit I’d love my own little palace of peace and solitude!

OP posts:
Friendlyfart · 18/12/2025 16:57

No, I’ve never lived alone nor wanted to.

BartholemewTheCat · 18/12/2025 16:55

I would definitely live alone. I mean, I do, but I’m poor at the same time. The ideal would be mo money, no problem. 😂

Mancity08 · 18/12/2025 16:55

Definitely, I’ve even suggested 2 homes in the past . Just think 🤔 making decisions just for yourself

XenoBitch · 18/12/2025 16:54

I already live alone. I have a DP (lives 10 min walk away) but we have no plans to live together. Been there, done that. Not doing it again.

HelpMySocksAreTouchingMe · 18/12/2025 16:53

We do have two separate homes, I highly recommend it. We are very happily married.

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