Do you have a Christmas dinner on Christmas Day? AIBU to politely decline

I wouldn't not go, just because the food isn't what you'd chose to serve. Just do it a different day.

We're doing our "big" christmas dinner on boxing day, just because that's the day the family are all coming round. We're having a salmon en croute for actual Christmas Day!

the fact you’re on here complaining op. Did you really think she was going to do a full sit down Xmas dinner for 21 people? You actually thought that?

look if Xmas dinner, on the actual day is so important to you then make yourself one, then go later, if it’s not so important to your immediate family they can go and spend time with their loved ones whilst you tuck in.

enjoy.

I can comfortably seat 10 people for a Christmas dinner but that’s my limit I think most couldn’t seat 21. What time are they planning this buffet? I would be doing an early Christmas dinner for midday not too huge portions and then as a buffet for so many just eat a little.

For years we didn't eat Christmas Dinner so it is survivable. I'd do one on Christmas Eve for yourselves and then do the traditional boxing day bubble and squeak mash up.

When my DC were young, I very quickly changed having the main dinner to Christmas Eve. Christmas day they were always tired from waking up so early, they'd snacked on chocolate from their stockings, I was knackered having waited for them to fall asleep to do stockings and then being up early! No one properly enjoyed the dinner.

I much prefer doing it Christmas Eve, means Christmas day is lovely and relaxed. DC are adults now and I did ask a couple of years back if they wanted to change it to Christmas Day instead and got a firm no!

Just have your dinner on Christmas Eve (or boxing day if you prefer) and enjoy not having to cook on the day!

21 for a roast dinner is hard to cater for.

I did 23 for 7 years and it was a military operation to get it all cooked and served up.

Just have your lunch at home and join them later.

I'd love a buffet!

As others suggested, do your trad Christmas Dinner on a different day.

I tend to have different celebrations with different people across the whole of the Xmas period, I think that's common for most of us. So easy enough to sly in a roast, when you are celebrating with others who also enjoy one! X

I agree, the 21 people is a major drip feed, and very few can do a complete sit down served up Xmas dinner for 21 people. The likely hood is there will be elements of the Xmas dinner there anyway,

My god. The 6% Irish in me would have had a meltdown and the other 94% of me quickly following suit. Please tell me you’ve gone low contact lol

You’re allowed to enjoy Christmas done the way you like. I am not generally a traditionalist but seeing as I work Xmas eve I would not be making a full Xmas dinner on Xmas eve. Xmas day to me is absolutely all about feasting with my family after the busiest period at work and ‘can’t really be arsed’ dinners for weeks. I enjoy the cooking and i really look forward to it. A buffet just isn’t the same.

If it's 21 people I can see why it's a buffet. Given that I'd just say we will come on Xmas day to see folks and say hi and have a starter and then we'll be back off to ours to have the mains and dessert ie Xmas dinner.

Or if the buffet is late, have an earlier xmas dinner and then dont bother eating at the buffet. No one will notice or care given it's so many people

But does everyone who’s coming, love seafood? Or is that just your preference? I’d personally refuse an invite anywhere, if that was the only food on offer.

@CantthinkofadifferentnameRoast dinner and Christmas dinner are NOT the same thing! 😳

Have a traditional Christmas dinner on another day as suggested by some others. Don't decline just because someone has different food.

My DH has 2 DS all 2 years apart in age when they were little my MIL started doing the traditional Christmas dinner on Christmas Eve & just doing a “small spread” with leftovers & picky bits on Christmas Day… she said when they were little the children didn’t want to sit at the dining table for a big meal and miss out on playing with toys & cousins.

Shes carried this on & it’s great, we don’t do Christmas at there’s every year, but I enjoy it when I do.

I’d go and do a Christmas dinner at home the day before / after

They've taken a non-traditional approach to the food offered to guests on Christmas Day ; you could take a non-traditional approach to being invited, by not turning up 😉

I agree with this.

DPIL were frequently guilty of shifting goal posts when it came to invitations. A simple 'come for dinner' would turn into a big family party. Except you wouldnt know until you arrived that you should have fed small DCs beforehand as 'dinner' was now an Iceland buffet, a symphony in beige.

Dont get me wrong, DPIL were lovely people but they had a total blind spot when it came to hosting.

This reminds me
of the year MIL announced we “eat too much potato as a family” and didn’t make any form of potato dish 😳

I can't imagine being close enough to someone that they'd invite me for Xmas dinner, but also so unbothered about their company that the exact type of Xmas dinner would be a dealbreaker.

depend on the age of DCs and how many days off you have I'd be tempted to go Scandinavian and have main meal and gifts on Christmas Eve, treating in laws event as a family gathering/ Boxing Day
Or hold your formal meal on Boxing Day

I'm so torn now
i love a buffet. Could happily eat satsumas crisps and chocolate in place of real
food and you've already accepted but I do understand the reluctance to cart the children around
there's no place like home really
need to discuss with DH

I agree with PP. Let the kids do Xmas day with their GP’s and do your roast on Xmas Eve or Boxing Day.

We do a roast as a buffet when there are lots of people. What kind of buffet is it?