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AIBU?

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Is this really enough food? Fed up of DH’s tightness

262 replies

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 19:55

To give some background, I live with DH and our DD. We have two sons who are at Uni and will be returning to ours ahead of the weekend for Christmas.

For the first night they are back, we thought it would be good to have party food so DH went out to get this earlier. We are both busy the next two days so this was the only opportunity - we also live very rurally so can’t just pop down the round for a shop.

He has come back with the following:

-2 lots of ‘3 for 2’ party food so 6 in total - things like breaded prawns and spring rolls. Not massive portions at all
-Two share bags of crisps
-Olives and a small pack of antipasto (salami etc)

Now, both DS’ are 6 foot plus rugby playing young men. They eat us out of house and home at the best of times. DD is really slender but has a healthy appetite too.

I don’t know what DH was thinking - I’d clearly said to buy double that amount of party food. Having discussed with him, it comes down to money which is ridiculous. He earns six figures which is complimented by my own salary and we have ample disposable income.

He maintains its sufficient food for the 5 of us. AIBU to disagree?

OP posts:
BlackCat14 · 17/12/2025 21:18

Fridgemanageress · 17/12/2025 20:01

i don’t know. Maybe he is going to do some rice salad, pasta salad lentil salad to compliment it all

From reading the OP, it really didn’t sound like it! He said he thought what he got was enough. No mention of him whipping up a fancy side salad which he doesn’t even have the ingredients for!

hyggetyggedotorg · 17/12/2025 21:18

To be fair, most people wouldn’t consider us to be overly rural but we’re an awkward 5 mile journey from the nearest city & can only get one Chinese, one Indian (based in our village) & one kebab shop to deliver.

VisitingSanta · 17/12/2025 21:16

He's bought starters ffs. It's definitely not enough.

hyggetyggedotorg · 17/12/2025 21:16

CombatBarbie · 17/12/2025 21:04

But shes already said she hasn't time to.go do another shop and lives rurally.

Are you deliberately misunderstanding me or just enjoying being awkward?

I was agreeing that without those things it was insufficient.

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2025 21:16

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:01

Kindly, I think a few posters have lost sight of the fact we are rural - not a takeaway in sight.

We are rural and Dominoes still deliver here. Clearly there is rural and then again, rural!

Ophy83 · 17/12/2025 21:15

Maybe have his nibbles as canapés and then whizz up a simple pasta dish e.g. cacio e pepe or carbonara. That will still feel like a treat meal, especially if you follow it up with something sweet

sprigatito · 17/12/2025 21:14

It’s clearly not enough food. The competitive undereaters would look at a shaved radish and tell you it was “ample”.

I would ask him to go back and buy a decent amount of food this time. Whether it’s weaponised incompetence or pathological meanness I don’t know, but it wants stamping on good and hard. It’s not your job to start rummaging in the kitchen and cooking alternatives just because he couldn’t perform a simple task without arsing it up.

DappledThings · 17/12/2025 21:06

mondaytosunday · 17/12/2025 21:03

@DappledThingsdo you have uni aged sons? My son alone would demolish three party platters and be raiding the fridge! Some of those sharing platters only have six things in them.

No, but I did buy similar type stuff for me. DH, two other adult males and a male teenager last NYE. DH was very concerned I'd not bought enough. Looked like plenty to me and there was loads left over.

ThePerfectTimeToPanic · 17/12/2025 21:05

MartinAynuss · 17/12/2025 21:03

Hmmm, well my 7ft American football playing sons would just inhale that as a pre-dinner snack.
What about a massive salad to go with it? Or maybe some whole loaves of bread and several pints of whole milk for them to snack on?

It’s got to be done. Those boys either with their hollow legs.

TigerDroveAgain · 17/12/2025 21:05

It’s strategic helplessness: he didn’t want to do the shop (I mean who would?) so he screwed it up on purpose and created more work for OP.

agree with whoever said get huge rugby playing sons to pick stuff up.

BernardButlersBra · 17/12/2025 21:04

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 20:07

He was in M&S and in his words they had plenty but he didn’t think it was good value.

We don’t usually buy this sort of UPF apart from treats, I try to cook from scratch as much as possible and he knows this was our only chance to get the shop done this week. So I’ll have to supplement with some healthier stuff and put up with the moaning.

Given where we live it’s not easy to get an online delivery either.

It was his mistake so he should be resolving it

CombatBarbie · 17/12/2025 21:04

hyggetyggedotorg · 17/12/2025 20:34

I know that. I was suggesting adding those things.

But shes already said she hasn't time to.go do another shop and lives rurally.

MartinAynuss · 17/12/2025 21:03

Hmmm, well my 7ft American football playing sons would just inhale that as a pre-dinner snack.
What about a massive salad to go with it? Or maybe some whole loaves of bread and several pints of whole milk for them to snack on?

mondaytosunday · 17/12/2025 21:03

@DappledThingsdo you have uni aged sons? My son alone would demolish three party platters and be raiding the fridge! Some of those sharing platters only have six things in them.

CarefullyCuratedFurniture · 17/12/2025 21:02

Oh for goodness sake, of course it's a mean and stingy spread. Tell him to get back in the car and go and buy the same again, at least. If it does turn out that you've over-catered, you can put the excess in the freezer.

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:01

dontmalbeconme · 17/12/2025 21:01

I took all the numbers from the first 6 items listed under 3 for 2 party food on the Sainsbury's app. I did see later that it's M&S. That's why I asked OP what he'd bought and quantities. 6x 10 items wouldn't be much for 5, but if it's including selections of 50, 20, 18 as well, then it's likely to be loads. 2 x150g share bags of crisps would be 50g per person (2 standard bags each), plus olives, salami etc.

I don't think this is as stingy as some people are imagining.

Edited

Only one pack has 10 , nothing larger than that.

OP posts:
BunnyLake · 17/12/2025 21:01

Can you make a pasta salad? If you’ve got any potatoes maybe a potato salad or garlic butter potatoes. Anything carby really to bulk it up.

DontPokeMe · 17/12/2025 21:01

GrassMarketeer · 17/12/2025 20:19

I actually think this is ok for the pre-made party food element. It's often quite greasy and rich and usually presented as small tasters, not a hearty meal.

Maybe your DH is thinking of adding olive bread, sourdough or rye bread, cheeses, nice crackers, hummus, wnipped feta, some lovely small tomatoes etc.

Saving the budget for that!😀

I agree about the greasy/rich element. I'd need some fresh bits and nice bread, part baked rolls or crackers and salad bits along side - tomatoes, celery and radishes with dips. Maybe some sliced ham or a ready cooked chicken for protein.

BernardButlersBra · 17/12/2025 21:01

🤣🤣🤣 me, my husband and 2 toddlers could get through all that no problems. So definitely not enough for you guys

dontmalbeconme · 17/12/2025 21:01

soupyspoon · 17/12/2025 20:51

Ok fair enough I get that. I thought perhaps it might not be enough, firstly those items are very small but also the xample was probably not based on the usual 3 for 2 ones, you couldnt get 50 cocktail sausages in one of those deals I think.

The 3 for 2 deals are normally trays of 10 things each.

I took all the numbers from the first 6 items listed under 3 for 2 party food on the Sainsbury's app. I did see later that it's M&S. That's why I asked OP what he'd bought and quantities. 6x 10 items wouldn't be much for 5, but if it's including selections of 50, 20, 18 as well, then it's likely to be loads. 2 x150g share bags of crisps would be 50g per person (2 standard bags each), plus olives, salami etc.

I don't think this is as stingy as some people are imagining.

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:01

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2025 20:57

I would order a couple of large delivery pizzas to go with that, preferably something expensive just to make the point.

I mean, I dont like things that are not good value in general but once in a blue moon is hardly going to break the bank.

I take it that this is an ongoing issue going by the title of the OP?

Kindly, I think a few posters have lost sight of the fact we are rural - not a takeaway in sight.

OP posts:
ChocolateCinderToffee · 17/12/2025 21:00

It sounds like the sort of snacks you'd have before dinner!

ChristmasfoodQ · 17/12/2025 21:00

Delphiniumandlupins · 17/12/2025 20:57

If he's worried about the cost why didn't he go to Aldi rather than M & S? Get a plate and portion out 1/5 of what he's bought, so he can see how much he is going to get for dinner. Then explain to him that he will be last to help himself and if the DC take more he will get less. Can your DD or either DS pick up some more food?

He won’t go near an Aldi or Lidl with a barge pole (his words not mine), which I always point out to him is ironic as he’d no doubt prefer the prices! I usually do our shop at M&S, it is rare I ask him to do it.

OP posts:
ThePerfectTimeToPanic · 17/12/2025 20:59

lol, very funny but I see you OP 👀

6 foot rugby playing lads
Slender daughter
6 figure salary
live rurally
Mention of UPFs and cooking from scratch

😂

PyongyangKipperbang · 17/12/2025 20:57

I would order a couple of large delivery pizzas to go with that, preferably something expensive just to make the point.

I mean, I dont like things that are not good value in general but once in a blue moon is hardly going to break the bank.

I take it that this is an ongoing issue going by the title of the OP?

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