To cut my sister off if she does this again this year?

She’s probably a bit wrapped up in her own life at the moment. Things will change and she’ll mature a bit. Please don’t cut contact. Have a chat with her though.

You’re going to have to let this go. One thing I have learned is that others are not required to live up to my expectations. Don’t cut your sister off or even care about this.

Perhaps the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and your niece is a grabby, spoilt brat and has learned it from her mother. The world doesn't revolve around your child, in my opinion botox and nails are far more worthwile than some plastic crap for your niece that she will forget about and will only add to landfill. Perhaps your niece doesn't adequately thank her when she has previously bought presents. I can't believe that you previously essentially forced her to buy her a present in the past.

In my book, not even buying your own niece a bday card of Christmas present is pretty poor show. I wouldn’t dream of not getting my nieces / nephew a present. Even my nieces who are 25 and 30 I still buy a gift as they are family.

It’s not grabby OP 🤣 perfectly normal to give presents and cards on birthdays, and YANBU to be surprised that your sister isn’t taking part.

Like others, I wouldn’t cut her out, but I wouldn’t be buying one for her either.

totally agree. Try not to make your child as materialistic as you are.

Cutting her off is a bit much but I'd give her back the attention she gives. I do this with my DH and did it with my mom. No point getting annoyed about it. It's simply not important to some people, which is fine. But I'm the same back then.

You said it happened before. Do you not think that strange and really should be looking at her health rather than feeling slighted. Has no one else in the family picked up on this strange behaviour regardless of how successful you all think she may be. Perhaps she is not and, needs all of your help and a medical evaluation. She may well be masking. Your child, who is no doubt the one all must bow to, will survive without a card or present. Your sister on the other hand, if she has medical issues she is not aware of, needs support so get on the case and look after her.

Not giving a gift seems a bit OTT to cut someone off about.

If she would only be giving a token then what is the point. The trainers when needed are more appropriate than a bit of tat on her birthday.

If DD needs something specific during the year then mention it and let them spend time together rather than worry about gifts.

You said she came to see her on her birthday.
Isn't that showing effort and far better than a silly £1 card she could have bought.
You're being completely unreasonable.

Just don't buy her any gifts or cards for any occasion, no need to cut her off. If she moans explain the concept of reciprocity to her. End of. No drama.

Your way OTT to cut her off because of this. Whilst it is usual / a nice gesture for a lot of people to give their niece / nephew a birthday / Christmas gift there's no law to say she has to.
And you know that if she ever has children you will not be getting them gifts/ cards for birthdays or Christmas.

I wouldnt cut her off, life is too short, and you'll need to be at family events with her in the future. I would, however, have a word. Tell her you think its hurtful to her only niece. And stop buying her anything

People are so strange about their children.

You would CUT OFF your sister who has done nothing to you at all??? What is wrong with you? All she has done is not buy your child gifts!! Your child is not you.

Think about your friends (usually a weaker relationship than a life long blood tie) - surely you must have some who have kids who you have no interest in or are brats or unpleasant. How you feel about those kids doesn't affect whether you like or care for your friend - because the child is not the parent.

Fine because your sister is an aunt to your child, you may have an expectation for gifting - but that's just your expectation. Your sister didn't ask to be an aunt.

If you seriously would choose to dispose of a life -long blood relationship over this, either you have a terrible relationship anyway or you are the type of person with no sense about what matters in life.

In 20 years time, your child will not give a shit about whether someone bought them a present; you on the other hand may very well be deeply distressed about having no relationship with a sister. You can't just create a new one.

My sister is like this. Always 'forgets'. This year I stopped getting her presents for her birthday and Christmas. If she can't put the effort in, nor can I.

Match the energy x

Your sister does not owe your daughter presents.

It’s good your sisters have made up for it in other ways, unfortunately my sister hasn’t she has only ever cared about herself. No one else matters to her, not even our parents.

I’m sorry it’s not that deep. I don’t care if my siblings don’t buy my child anything because I spoil and do enough for my own child

If my sister was this horrendous I wouldn't want to spend time with her either. But in fact, even though my sisters have never really acknowledged my children's birthdays, they have been such good sisters and aunts in other ways that I would hate to lose them.

It’s ridiculous to cut her off over that. You cannot be serious. It’s not as if she doesn’t bother at all with you and DD, she came over to see her on her birthday.

You would choose to not have your sister in your life or your child's life because she doesn't buy presents for your child?

When did it become normal for people to do this? It's seems to be trendy to end relationships and cut people out over the smallest of issues.

It isn't normal, not at all.

No, you shouldn’t ditch your sister because she didn’t buy your kid a present.

I wouldn't make a statement like "I'm cutting you of right now" but would arrange my life without her in it. Like, no more birthday- or other wishes, no more invitations, no more gifts even small, no more including her in outings with her niece (your daughter). In short, don't include her anymore. Maybe she will change her ways, maybe not. But she will know that if she wants to stay in your cloud she will have to acknowlege your child.

Nobody has to buy your kids a present.

Childless siblings get a raw deal at Christmas. People can end up with multiple nieces and nephews to purchase for, and tend to receive a present from 'the household' in return. Even in your scenario she's expected by you to purchase for two - will you purchase two gifts back?

A present is only a joy to receive if the giver actually WANTS to give a present. Don't force it.

I normally consider my posts on mumsnet to be quite moderate but I find myself slightly disgusted by this one. I have a brother in law who never bought my kids anything, I didn’t mind they always had enough presents and the children never seemed to notice. Now my kids are adults he has been the most wonderful uncle. So what if she doesn’t buy presents if it makes you feel better don’t buy her any.