Do I have a lot going on?

Yes other jobs do work incredibly hard too and long hours. Difference is they are often paid to reflect this. I’m not sure why people sharing their own experiences makes you laugh though.

Same! My colleagues describe how stressful it is but I don’t see it at all after the stress of teaching. And I get paid a shit load more!

I did teacher training, granted it was 20 years ago now so it might’ve changed, but omg it was incredibly stressful. One of the hardest years of my life. And I was in my 20s with no kids. I remember my mentor teacher crying after an horrible lesson and I just thought I do not want to do this for the next 40 years! So I became an accountant instead. Much better suited

Whats your industry OP? How secure and progressive is your DH work?

Teacher here 🙋🏽‍♀️

If you’re struggling as it is, please do not start teacher training.
I have been a teacher for 15 years and have 3 kids under 5 (one in reception and twins 18m). There is no way would I be coping if I didn’t have plenty of experience already. And even then it is TOUGH.

what are your reasons for becoming a teacher ?
If you think it’ll be easier you’re going to really really regret it!

I left teaching for a corporate role…I would choose corporate EVERY TIME! 😆😆

Have you done both though? Why does people sharing their real life experience make you laugh at them?

Teaching is one of the worst jobs for family life balance. You cant just take a morning or afternoon off for sports day/ nativity, if your head lets you then you are very very lucky! You need to be in school for around 7:30 and won’t leave until 6. It is highly likely you will work after the kids are in bed. You will work weekends and you will work through the holidays.

43000 teachers left during 2024, for reasons other than retirement. Many to lower paid jobs. That tells you a lot.

Ugh teaching.

Destroyed my mental health permanently. I got out through ill health retirement. That’s how bad it made me.

I was fairly normal before being a teacher.

What about social work?

Either way I’d move house and stay in your current job until the kids are out of nursery then retrain.

It always makes me laugh when I see threads about teacher training, and everyone piles in to say “don’t do it” “teachers work 60 hours a week” “you’ll end up working evenings and weekends” “it’s not family friendly”

Yes. But many of us in other careers in the private sector are doing this already, raising kids, and doing it with 28 days annual leave.

Im not saying teaching isn’t a hard job- Im very aware it’s horrifically difficult, and the conditions are very challenging - but many of us considering changing careers in favour of teaching, are going into it with our eyes open and 20 years of that kind of workload behind us. Nobody I know seriously considering teaching is interested in doing it for holidays or easy hours.

If you are living with family right now, that's really stressful. You need a home. It's good you're identifying that you don't think your job security is great, but you haven't been given notice of consultation for redundancy yet. Presumably you have over 2 years employment so you have good rights.
I would go ahead with the house move and get settled, then start looking for a new job. But as pp have said, not teaching.

Unless your DH is going to do 98% of EVERYTHING (including all the thinking/planning) and you’re happy to not be present with them for the year

This pretty much sums up your training and first year+ of teaching.

My ex husband stepped up and did everything. I was so overwhelmed, I wasn't going to attend my own daughter's second birthday party until he forced me to.

And I definitely wasn't present with them for the year.

And that was 20 years ago. It's worse now.

You will cry daily and many teachers report having 'a tree' on their commute to work - especially during the early years. I did and I didn't realise it was a thing until I heard an ECT recently talking about her tree. It turns out many people have had a tree at some point in their career.

@New2Mumming I think one thing at a time applies here.

What's the motivation to move? There must be a good reason you got this far in the buying process.

How much do you need to be able to earn to afford your (new) mortgage and bills? The crucial question is can you afford it if you are made redundant for at least a few months? If the answer is yes then move (unless it's an upgrade you'd like but isn't essential e.g you have enough bedrooms already but want a garage).

Then worry about the next steps. Have you even applied for teaching yet? Is it a PGDE rather than a BEd? You can do a PGDE part time over a longer period which might be better given your childcare costs.

I'd apply to give yourself options if you want them (you can always defer) but agree with others that this is a very hard stage of life to do it. You'll also need to show some experience of being in a classroom or appropriate volunteering on your application. It's quite competitive unless you are planning secondary in a real shortage subject.

Is what you really want to stay at home while the kids are little and in expensive childcare? Have you crunched the numbers on that short term?

Have you been with your current employer long enough to get redundancy. If so you'd be daft to leave.

Sit down and work everything out and take it from there.

You have a lot going on, but you'll have more than ten times that: workload, stress, no energy left for your own children if you go straight into teaching at the current time with 3 and 5 year old kids when your heart isn't even in it. Your DH shouldn't be pushing you to do this- it will not be sustainable.

If there is a chance of redundancy, wait it out. My husband's company took about 3 years to finally make him redundant. He got a payout plus our kids were all 3 years older which gave us a lot more flexibility around our kids and what he did next.

Training as a teacher is bonkers. I did it in the 1980s and it was awful (I finished and swore that id never set foot in a classroom again). My friend did it about 10 years ago and the workload and expectations were so much higher. She started an ECT job with a toddler and left after a term.

Buy your house. Once you are in it, then it's so much easier to make the numbers work.

Teacher training with small children - no. Unless your DH is going to do 98% of EVERYTHING (including all the thinking/planning) and you’re happy to not be present with them for the year.

Teaching with small children - no. And you’ll be full time as part time jobs are like finding unicorns. There are a lot of reasons for this but lack of any flexibility and high workload are two key ones.

If teaching is your long lost passion then sort some decent work experience and spend some time with teacher-mums (and ex ones who can tell you why they left) to get a true idea of what it’s like.

I did my teacher training with a 1 year old.

I wouldn't recommend it, tbh.

Don't go into it thinking its a family friendly career - it's not.

Don't go into it thinking the holidays will save you money on childcare and allow you to spend time with your children. It will to a degree but you will be sacrificing evenings and weekends during term time.and a lot of your holidays will be spent working either at home or in school.

If you are highly motivated to become a teacher; know a lot of teachers so have heard the reality from people who live it; are very organised; have very high resilience and are generally mentally and emotionally strong then it can work.

But if you're going into it thinking it will be a nice little job and give you lots of time with your family - don't do it.

If you're 'not desperate to be a teacher' - don't do it.

There is very little job security now for new teachers. Lots of fixed term 1 year contracts, lots of budget cuts, very high expectations in terms of your availability and commitment. Very few TAs, unrealistic expectations. Lots of significant behavioural issues. Lots of unsupported high SEND needs.

Eg this year, I have no TA, 20% of my class are working 2+ years below their year group and can't access the curriculum. I have to teach two completely different lessons concurrently. I work 7.30am - 6pm every day due to measures introduced to reduce workload and nothing you ever do is good enough.

I love teaching. And I'm good at it. But I'm leaving this year after 20 years because it's unsustainable and getting worse.

It doesn’t sound like you should be a teacher, tbh
Tesching jobs can still be hard to secure.

Children also need people who actually want to do the job, for people who have a reason ( other than money) to push through. You’ll be miserable if you don’t really want to do it.

I would wait until the children are older, if tou
could. TT is brutal with young children. Your industry is at risk but you might not be affected.

He doesn’t ‘help’ with nursery drop off. He does nursery drop offs.

Language matters.

Do you have any classroom or teaching experience, OP? If not, I'd seriously suggest getting some before you commit to a career change.

I thought I wanted to be a teacher for many years until I set foot in a classroom in a teaching capacity. It's hard work. A different sort of hard work from my corporate job with a long commute, long hours at times, tight deadlines, people demanding the impossible; it's physically and emotionally draining in a way I really hadn't anticipated.

I'm not trying to put anyone off, but you really need to be enthusiastic about this and be the right type of person for it too.

If you think you've got a lot on now you'll be in for a shock if you train to teach. Teacher of 25 years here and it has become unmanageable in my opinion. I am just about coping because I have the experience to fall back on and I am in a trap currently with needing the salary. My kids are teenagers now. I would not recommend training to teach at this point in your life.

Just posting to echo others really. You need to consider that teaching jobs are quite tough to get (if not maths or science) and that some schools are making redundancies. Teaching is nowhere near as secure as you think.

Recent ex teacher here! Your current load sounds about the same as mine currently which while tiring and stressful at times, does feel like a holiday after doing the same amount whilst teaching. I’ve never known such a mental and physical load as trying to raise two small humans and teach in the current education climate. Not a job I would currently be looking to go into unless it was my absolute passion (which it used to be for me and even I fell out of love with it) and I had very few responsibilities in my personal life.

I agree. I say this as a teacher who taught for 31 years. It is extremely demanding and despite what people think is not particularly family friendly.