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AIBU?

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AIBU to think housework has nothing to do with money?

27 replies

EuclidianGeometryFan · 15/12/2025 11:52

Not a TAAT, but I have seen the opinion expressed that if a couple are paying 50% each into the house, that the housework should be split 50/50.

To my mind, that is crazy. The housework split and financial split have nothing to do with each other.
Financial contributions depend on income.
Housework contributions depend on time available.
So if one person has a long commute and the other works part time, they split the housework so that they have equal 'time off' or leisure time, to either go out or to sit and do whatever they want.

Obviously the two are related in that if you are working part time or not working, you have less money to contribute, but you have more time (though if you are ill you may not achieve much housework in that time).
If you can't trust your part-time partner to put a reasonable amount of effort into housework (including childcare) when you are out at work, it is a doomed relationship.

Couples should decide together about who works what hours and what the financial arrangements will be, without regard to housework.

And, more importantly, they should look at who gets what leisure time and relaxation time without regard to who is paying what.
Otherwise the person earning less just becomes the domestic servant of the one who earns more.

OP posts:
JHound · 15/12/2025 11:55

I agree. A lot of people use “I earn more” to imply
their partner should be their skivvy.

mumofoneAloneandwell · 15/12/2025 11:54

Yanbu its about time and energy available

If youre working all hours as an nhs nurse and your man has family money so is more wealthy, but doesnt work, he should be taking care of the home 🤷‍♀️

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