To feel a bit sad that I’m the only person in my household who would enjoy a fancier Christmas meal?

How about having it as an elegant breakfast with a glass of bucks fizz or champagne? Maybe with a nice toasted muffin. They can have cereal or toast if salmon is not their thing

Start planning a birthday meal out in January with your friends now so you have something to look forward to.

I totally get this OP! My DH is a food is fuel type of person too. I love food and foodie occasions and I too was brought up to enjoy a long and leisurely meal around the table. DH eats and then wants to leave! We do go out for dinner/lunch etc but I never cook much more than basic stuff at home as he just doesn't appreciate the effort. He'd say 'that was nice' if it was a cheese toastie or a three hour gourmet meal. Again, like you said - not a LTB situation. I'll never change him or fix him so I'm fine - he is how he is and I am how I am!

I have two friends who love food as I do so I get my fix with them! I also love going out to one of my favourite eating places with my book and a free morning or afternoon and just spend some time on my own enjoying a lovely brunch or lunch on my own.

Perhaps they just like the traditional Xmas dinner.

I would not rock that boat just try and persuade them to eat new things on another occasion.

Or maybe him on his own when his mother is not about.

Tough as it it is, looks like you are outnumbered here

I would do the basic roast and a small amount of yummy extras for me (pigs in blankets, cauliflower cheese, fried sprouts etc.) knowing I’ll have them all to myself. Then tea can be either the starter and pudding the other two aren’t interested in or your own little buffet. It might feel a bit weird eating different food but it will bring you joy, it’s a little treat, it’ll remind you of your childhood and you’ll feel pleased with yourself that you didn’t just go along with what the others are having. It’s a special day after all

Could he not engage with it just to be nice to you? It would hardly cost him, would it?

When my children were little I used to do a starter on Xmas day just for me, then a pudding just for me. It was just because they only wanted the actual main course until they got older when they still didn’t want a starter or a pudding until the day after. I really enjoyed it and there is no reason why you can’t too.

If it makes you feel any better, OP, I live alone and very occasionally cook myself something wildly extravagant (with pudding) and sit and eat it in splendid isolation. Well, the dog stares at me now and again.

Food should be a pleasure. Your OH and his mum clearly don't feel that way, which is up to them, but YOU are allowed to luxuriate in a meal now and again. They can slope off with their frugal coffee to compare how 'full up' they are while you tuck into something wonderful and creamy and listen to a terrific podcast!

But you can't blame other people for that and let it ruin your day (well, you can I guess, but it's a bit silly).

Honestly, buck up! You are in charge. They will eat when you serve it. Lay the table nicely, with crackers. Serve the starter, do your crackers, have a glass of fizz.

So it’s now 1.30pm, serve the main.
Get the, to do the clearing up while you have a sit with a coffee. Serve a fancy dessert instead of your evening meal.

Yes, I would do it anyway, make it festive. You may find they join in and enjoy if it is put in front of them.

I think you need to have a talk with your husband about how this makes you feel sad. It wouldn't hurt him to make a bit of an effort.

As for pudding, some sort of fruity concoction would be palate cleansing and light.

Well, obviously the OP is not comfortable doing so

Starters are the point of the meal at which you can be extravagant without it costing a fortune. Two scallops per person at £1.50 per scallop is expensive, I agree, but lobster as a main course for 8 people would be ruinous. Which is why people have turkeys.

Where's your daughter this year, OP?

They do sound a very joyless pair, tbh. I think I'd rather be at home alone cooking what I wanted in my own kitchen.

YABU to be sad over their preferences. But no one has stopped you from making anything have they? Stop with the self pity and make something that makes you happy. Or perhaps just buy a fancy salad and dessert if you don't want to make the effort for one.

It won't be their loss if you don't make it or do but it will be your loss to not have something you enjoy.
.

Can't you just do it? 😄

Go all out for yourself, take photos, maybe offer some on olio???

Make a tiktok/Facebook post about how you made each one if you like

Go for it! I'm the same, its just me and my autistic dd(6) and dcat. Christmas dinner for dd is meat and french fries and the cat will have some meat

I just do it for myself 🥰🥰

Do a version for yourself of what you want and offer a taste of it to them on the day. Ignore their "ew" faces if they do them. You never know, maybe they won't...!

Many people don't feel that much about food. I do.

I'd would, very politely, disagree. Starters are (or should be) the most exciting part of the meal...

Everyone's not going to like the same food. You just make what everyone likes, I do that, I have my fish starters, the others have soup etc we all don't eat the same veg so I do what everyone likes that way we all have a dinner we like and I'm not squeezing roast potatoes between my teeth because I hate them.

Everyone needs more than just their partner. It's not healthy to make your world so small.

I thought the same! why is this whole day about what dp and his mum want? you're in danger of diminishing yourself and making yourself invisible in this relationship by going along with what everyone else wants.

Absolutely make it! And bring a pudding! You can enjoy it and you never know, one day they might try it. Does your oh know how upser you are? He might try it if he does as it’s important to you.

I also think you need a ‘friendsmas’.