To wonder what all these thoughtful gifts are?

What dont you like about baylis and harding

Love this!

I had a male relative who insisted that anything other than head and shoulders made his head itch. Their wife decanted the Tesco own brand head and shoulders equivalent into a H&S bottle for about 7 years without him noticing.

Considering some on MN claim to shower several times a day, a gift set of shower gel would be a thoughtful present.

I suppose showing that you have listened to and know the person- didn’t just buy something random for the sake of gifting something.
for example one friend has mentioned casually a couple of times that she struggled to find her favourite deodorant the last few times she went to the store. I made sure said deodorant was part of the gift.
another friend was really into yoga, etc- I made sure the gift included a nice water bottle, etc

My ‘thoughtful Christmas gift’ came from my son.

We share a love of musicals (he performs). I told him a story about, as a child, going to see the Sound of Music at the cinema. My first trip to a cinema. My favourite film.
At the same time I was also given the LP, which I proudly took to school. Unfortunately, the LP slipped out of the cover and skidded across the gravelly playground. Scratched and unplayable. Forever. Never replaced.

My Christmas present from my son, the Sound of Music LP, bought for £2 in a charity shop.
I cried!

A few months ago I got told I was destroying the planet because I have autumn themed bedding which was ‘tat’. To hell I go. 😂 For some reason they thought I would only use it once or for a couple of months this year before sending it to landfill. Bizarre.

My ex MIL refused to give cash because it was vulgar. She would buy my teenage sons a model of the solar system , a build your own volcano kit etc etc. They would have appreciated £20.00 in cash to put towards a bike/ computer/ ski kit but she gave them things that she thought were thoughtful but were tat they left at their dad's house. He took the things to a charity shop every new year.

I'd love to know this too! Because I guess its pretty easy to buy thoughtful gifts for people who have specific hobbies and interests, or when they've mentioned they like a particular thing. But in the absence of that, what constitutes 'thoughtful'?

My "thoughtful gift" last year was a high quality thermos mug for someone with a driving job.

It wasn't an obvious gift, like golf clubs for a golfer, but I thought of something that would hopefully make each day a bit nicer. Make winter warmer.

I genuinely like this stuff too.. consumable, useful but generally a bit nicer than I'd buy day to day.

I've said this before on MN but a lot of people who congratulate themselves on being such good gift givers actually probably just have very nice/polite family and friends who react well when they give them gifts ranging from perfectly-fine-but-could-have-just-bought-myself/lived without to dear-god-she's-done-it-again-wtf-is-this-crap?

I'm sure occasionally there are some 'wow' hits but surely most adults just buy themselves things they like if and when they want them? Unless you happen to have very generous friends/family who surprise you with things completely out of your budget, not many people actually receive things they LOVE and would 'never have bought themselves' very often.

Many moons ago, my now husband commissioned a series of illustrations of me and my daughter at various ages in the style of my favourite children’s books. This was pre-generative AI.

I’d said that summer that I was sad there weren’t more pictures of me with DD when she was little because I was a single mother and usually behind the camera.

He also made me an adapted games controller so I could still play video games with my disability.

I gave up being thoughtful, I can’t compete with him 😂

Tat is defined on MN at something the poster is not keen on. I was told on here that my M&S Christmas bedlinen was tat, which is really incredibly rude.

I once did a photo album for someone and there was not even a change in facial expression- turns out they think digital is the way to go and don’t love photos

I think the point of presents is to create a moment of kindness and appreciation between the giver and recipient. They do not need to be “perfect”. It is enough to know that the person has put a bit of effort into it. So a book about tennis players, even if you don’t enjoy it, still shows that the person has tried to get something you would like. A Bayliss & Harding gift set on the other hand shows that not much thought has gone into it (unless the recipient is a huge B&H fan I guess).

I’m always amused at the Mumsnetters who, upon being told that their niece or nephew would really love to receive cash, turn their noses up at giving money and pride themselves on buying ‘thoughtful’ gifts instead, even though that is actually the opposite of thoughtful.

I’ve bought my partner a painting of a place that is special to him for his office. I’ve also got a friend to send me his favourite snack that isn’t sold here, from the country she is in where it’s sold.

My daughter is vegan and misses certain jelly sweets, which contain gelatine, so I’ve bought her vegan versions that I’ve found. I’ve also had a teddy made to look like our pet that we lost as I know she’ll love that.

My friend lost her favourite scarf on a train just after last Xmas and was really upset. I don’t know why she was so attached to it but she was. I’ve managed to find it new with tags on vinted so I’ve bought it for her.

I think these are thoughtful gifts, although I like a bit of what mumsnet call ‘tat’ which seems to cover most things. 😂 My kids loved ‘plastic tat’ when they were younger. 🎄🎄🎄

I get my DH a moleskin notebook every year because he likes to have one near him all the time so he can jot down story ideas, and this year I’ve got him a soda stream maker because he can’t tolerate the artificial sweeteners in most fizzy drinks but likes fruity sodas, so that and some syrups/cordials should solve the problem for him. It’s not about expense it’s about finding something that you think the person will really like.

I am that person! Please don't get me wrong of course I like a well thought of gift of something I enjoy, but I very rarely get a generic box set and sometimes I would like one. I save money by buying the very basic shower gel and shampoo and hand soap as I don't have sensitive skin so a dove set or bayliss and harding set (yes I know how MN feels about these don't come at me) feel like a treat for me. Silly I know but I do appreciate them especially if they're in a scent that I prefer, like a woodsy smell as opposed to a fruity smell. I know, I'm cheap 🙈

I am the same and j really am not being polite.
@EchoedSilence i agree. It's hilarious that only b&h cause allergy/thrush/headaches/itching and all the other silly claims yet MB and l'occ don't.
I wonder what would happen if the b&h was decanted into a MB bottle?

Thoughtful means something that the other person woule like.

For example if you gave me some flowers then that would be very kind but if you gave me a bunch with no white flowers because you knew I found them very funeral-like then the gift would be thoughtful.

My teen son is getting some gifts that others wouldn’t like but I will have picked what he will actively like. For example one year I bought lots of different types of instant noodles so he can make a quiet snack while gaming overnight (I start work very early) which he thought was great.

I can't specify what is thoughtful about the gifts really as it may not apply to the people you buy for. It's about choosing a book you are pretty sure they will love, and item which taps into a convo you had months ago , favourite sweets, drink, an item you think they will either love or at least find useful etc.