To think ADHD/ASD labels get used too casually sometimes?

same here. It’s a creative memory sensory thing, not autism

Me too! What utter nonsense and I speak as parent of autistic children and somebody who works with children who have autism.

What utter nonsense and I speak as parent of autistic children and somebody who works with children who have autism.

My dc’s diagnoses were crucial for them to get the medical care and education they need. Explanation was crucial for them.

And as for the “excuse challenge”that’s just appalling.

I think for some people it minimises how tough life is. Like everyone I know has been diagnosed with ADHD since COVID. I really don’t think it’s ADHD, because I think it’s normal to struggle to cope with 8 hours a day planted in front of a screen with little actual human interaction except on Teams, to come home sit inside and scroll on TikTok, and then expect your brain to not be frazzled. I look at people around me and it’s clear they are overwhelmed, burnout, exhausted, and drinking too much wine to cope with all of the above.

I think we are doing ourselves a disservice by calling ourselves broken and taking meds to cope when it’s our lifestyles that are breaking us. A lot of people, not all, need less screen time, more fresh air, more fulfilling work, more human interaction, more movement, less cigarettes, alcohol, coke, sleeping tablets, you name it.

Wow and the award for most ableist post goes to..

Autistic traits need to have a significant impact on life to get a diagnosis .

Honestly you're embarrassing yourself with talking about things you seem to know very little about. Having ASD means that everything is more difficult, it doesn't have to be severe - can you imagine coping in an interview? When you can't work out what is being expected from you, when you take everything literally, when you can't put yourself in the interviewers shoes, when you can't read their facial expressions, when your anxiety is through the roof due to how difficult you find being put on the spot and having to be sociable with people you don't know at all.

So strategies put in place to support and meet needs. These are the same with or without a diagnosis.
Hard work isn't it, planning ahead, pre-empting, identifying needs trying and practising strategies.

Supporting my child from not even being able to stay in school for 30 seconds without me, to a first class honours degree in linguistics with Japanese…

I think you are embarrassing yourself with your rant. You know nothing about me.

This is the sort of nonsense I actually hate.

What the fuck 'industry' are you talking about?

When 80% of the population is NT, being NT still holds a very real meaning. That still means though that 1 in 5 children are ND so yes there is a good chance that you will know a few, or even several.

DS is diagnosed autistic and dyspraxic, but don't worry I didn't use it an excuse for parenting - he's currently working as a software engineer. He was actually diagnosed aged 11 in 45 minutes by an NHS paediatrician that specialised in ASD, so no it didn't require a full team of professionals over a period of time.

Honestly you're embarrassing yourself with talking about things you seem to know very little about. Having ASD means that everything is more difficult, it doesn't have to be severe - can you imagine coping in an interview? When you can't work out what is being expected from you, when you take everything literally, when you can't put yourself in the interviewers shoes, when you can't read their facial expressions, when your anxiety is through the roof due to how difficult you find being put on the spot and having to be sociable with people you don't know at all.

Can you imagine coping with a job when you have no idea how to make small talk with your colleagues, when just saying hello to people feels alien, when you struggle to not talk at people or to know when to join or how to leave a conversation. And when even if you do manage to find ways to fake some of these things the mental energy it takes to mask and fit in all day long is absolutely exhausting. These aren't personality traits.

I'll tell you the practical response anyway - the practical response 99% of the time is, I'm sorry you didn't get the job. And as a result of this only about 22% of autistic adults are in any sort of paid work in the UK. DS was extremely fortunate and was offered questions in advance for his position due to his autism in his current job - it's still pretty rare though. He's been there 2 years and absolutely loves it, they are so supportive - but again it's rare.

I wouldn't have been diagnosed had someone not suggested it

(He'd known me long enough and has ASD himself. It wasn't some flippant remark because of one thing I said or did)

I wish we could all leave diagnosis to the professionals rather than suggesting it so casually as many people do.

And yes, I'm not a fan of the whole neurospicy thing either.

The ADHD is my super power people can get in the bin. I have struggled my entire life with debilitating symptoms and once I was medicated it helped enormously but it isn't a superpower and I wish I didn't have it.

People who genuinely believe they have it are free to self identify given the long waiting lists and lack of support. But the people who claim they are a little neuro spicy and it's their superpower are annoying as hell.

As someone in the cohort of having always had a number of fairly clear traits but not seeing the point in a diagnosis now, it’s tricky. I agree with the pp that we’re in an era of increased awareness and that’s a good thing, but I can see how irritating it would be hearing someone go about their ‘neurospiciness’ if you’re dealing with far more difficult to manage traits.

Maybe it’s similar to how many/most people will experience a depressive episode vs long term depressive mental illness. Obvs ‘neurospiciness’ (for want of a better word) isn’t transient in that way, but I guess I think that more awareness will hopefully be positive for everyone.

No, I very rarely see that apart from some overly worried mums with babies/toddlers. But if you're telling me your child has trouble with transitions, meltdowns 3 times a day at 8, has black and white thinking and sensory issues then I'm going to suggest to you that they might be autistic.

No one has a problem with someone suggesting they might be suffering with migraines or covid - even if there's a chance it might actually be flu. I don't find it dismissive to suggest any condition if the symptoms are suggesting it.

I've never seen anyone say they're a bit on the spectrum anyway, I've heard 'a bit OCD' but never with ASD. Actually though I think I'm a bit autistic, my assessor thought I was probably more dyspraxic but I have a relative with a diagnosis of dyspraxic with ASD traits so maybe that fits me too. The assessor was unsure and wanted me to see another assessor but I pulled out because the process was too stressful. DS is also diagnosed ASD/dyspraxic.

People who are severely affected by ASD clearly require support. Correct diagnosis requires a full team if professionals, over a period of time, not self made, social media driven parents who use labels as an excuse.

I agree that labels are used too easily. While diagnoses such as ADHD or ASD can sometimes help explain patterns of behaviour, they have increasingly become part of an industry that risks over-labelling normal human variation.
If we truly accept that everyone is unique, then by definition we are all “neurodiverse,” which raises the question of whether the idea of a clear “neurotypical” still holds any real meaning.

A diagnosis does not change the strategies required. Children still need planning, boundaries, consistency, and support tailored to their personalities. A child who dislikes change, struggles to read facial expressions, or thinks literally may have ASD—or may simply have those traits as part of who they are. In practical terms, the response is the same.

Over-reliance on diagnosis can also distract from the importance of parenting that fosters independence, emotional resilience, and problem-solving skills. If every difficulty is explained away by a label, we risk creating individuals who are less equipped to cope, adapt, and develop strategies for themselves. Supporting children should be about building capability and self-understanding, not limiting them with explanations that excuse challenge rather than preparing them for it

I’m not sure. I don’t think they are used in the same way as OCD, which is definitely used too casually. But I have ADHD and ASD and I don’t tend to tell people unless I know them really well because I know that there is a perception that people are jumping on the ND bandwagon and attention seeking etc. And I still constantly mask my symptoms as much as I can so even people who know me well are really skeptical.

I think it’s brilliant people can find a description for how they find themselves in the world. If you think you have adhd you very well might be- you’ve probably read the traits. They’ve read something that resonates with how they are in the world.
dont see how it takes away from people with a diagnosed ADHD, who will understand more about their condition. I think the super power chat is trying to see the silver linings in the situation. Even terrible circumstances such as illness or death in life can often bring something positive to someone’s life. Or at least that’s how people cope with it.

People are self diagnosing because waiting lists are so long. They’re often genuinely trying to get help or get others to understand their struggles. All the neuro spicy, neuro sparkly, superpower stuff annoys me, because every person I know with autism really struggles with life due to the traits they have.

I meant to quote @BeforeSigourneyWeaverTheyWoveTheirOwnSigourneys

Yes its akin to autism being a super power

That sounds like the superpower belief for those who are autistic.

I have three autistic children, one who is classed as academically gifted, but the enhancement of being a human calculator with an amazing memory doesn’t get over the fact that he can’t do very simple social interactions.

OCD is one I see a lot and makes me so annoyed. No you do not have OCD because you like the dishwasher stacked a certain bloody way..... Now if you can't get out of the house in the morning and are late for work because you ve had to go back and check it 5 times and redo all of your other morning routines then you might have a point (and obviously it's not as simplistic as that either)

That’s interesting. It’s not the word I use to introduce the idea. I’d start with “I have ADHD”, and then use “neurodivergent/neurospicy” later in the conversation.

Yes, I do now. For years, I've been convinced I'm either adhd or autistic. I finally had my assessment for adhd and was told I do not have it, that the traits I show are from past trauma. It's quite enlightening actually to know that they're not fixed traits within me and I can change them. I now realise that by labelling myself, I was doing myself a disservice and became stuck in a rut believing it's just the way I am.

Autism "can" have enhancements for some (for Eg: those who are academically gifted) but by it's very nature it will be "disabling" in other areas of that person's life.
That person having insight and awareness of how they balance the demands (and environment) placed upon them will help them navigate a world that by it's design will deplete them, so yes, being autistic can be an asset to some, but it's more complicated that that and will have a detriment.

Being 100% honest, if you were standing in front of me telling me you were "neuro spicy", or I was in your friend group and you were all discussing being "neuro spicy" then I would absolutely think you were attention seeking. If you told me you were neurodivergent or have ADHD then I wouldn't.