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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you think coming into existence is a good thing for every human

157 replies

Pavementworrier · 12/12/2025 15:36

We all live through pain at some point. Hopefully also joy (although I'd say that's a fairly modern possibility for ordinary folk). When you make a child exist is it always a good thing, regardless of the balance of ups and downs? Are you grateful just to be here for this experience no matter how it goes?

(Inspired by a conversation on another thread)

OP posts:
Lilyhatesjaz · 12/12/2025 15:51

I don't think you miss what you've never had, and people in the past were less bothered by hygiene.
There is a lot of joy in good company, beautiful views, flowers. The love of family.

Pavementworrier · 12/12/2025 15:48

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 12/12/2025 15:44

You don't think ordinary people in the past felt joy?

I find it hard to believe that my ancestors who had to work from dawn til dusk in medial, boring, humiliating jobs just to feed themselves and their families had much time for joy tbh. Not to mention having to use a chamber pot. Double not to mention having to empty other people's chamber pots.

OP posts:
ChoccieCornflake · 12/12/2025 15:45

I don't think indoor toilets and hot showers are essential for happiness.

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 12/12/2025 15:44

You don't think ordinary people in the past felt joy?

Pavementworrier · 12/12/2025 15:42

For my part, while modern life for the fortunate is pretty fine and our generation in particular has lived through what has felt like a very hopeful period, I find it absolutely unbelievable that people kept having children before indoor toilets and hot showers existed.

OP posts:
ComfortFoodCafe · 12/12/2025 15:39

No. Those born very poorly and have no real life other than lying in a bed, blind & deaf etc I think its cruel.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 12/12/2025 15:38

No not really.

Had some great times and some sreasful
ones. Struggled with bad mental health all my life. Life is just hard.