To ask if you think coming into existence is a good thing for every human

How “dare” she? For God’s sake, this is only Mumsnet; it’s not PMQ.

Why was that funny?

Future generations may think the same for us when they have developed or invented things we can’t even imagine right now that make their lives easier than ours.

I think it’s all relative. We are constantly bombard with worries from all over the world which people in the past would have been oblivious to. The ordinary person would have had little clue about wars overseas unless it came to involve them directly, for example, whereas we have to worry about global conflicts and nuclear weapons. I think they had harder physical lives in the past but were much happier in these sense of community than many of us today.

You don't seem to have much knowledge of medieval history. The peasants weren't "owned". They held a low rank in a feudal hierarchy. They were free to move around the country at will. They could leave and set up somewhere else. The main issue was that they could never own the land they worked on. For that, and several other reasons, social mobility was extremely limited. But if you genuinely believe they were powerless you should read up on English society post the Black Death. FWIW, sumptuary laws had sod all to do with what people were allowed to eat and were not universal anyway - some countries had them, some didn't. That comment was pretty embarrassing. HTH.

I have outlived many people and animals I have loved including my parents and my best friend.
Their being in my life enriched it and continues to do so. I am so grateful for the time I had with them and their memory remains and makes me happy every day. I am the person I am because of them.

Loss doesn't weaken love. If anything it makes it stronger. "What will survive of us is love".

Even when it doesn't feel like it there is always love in the world for everyone.

I always shudder at the thought of my female ancestors having 10 or more children and what it must have done to their bodies. Let alone the actual risks of pregnancy and childbirth. But then I don’t think women had much of a voice about it. Men would rather the woman risk it than go without, and the marriage vows dictated that a wife has promised to submit. I would have found that a miserable life.
Of course, this is still the life for many women in different parts of the world today.

Well said!

i think the natural instinct is to have sex and, especially pre-contraception, children were an unavoidable consequence. Which is still the case in countries where contraceptives are difficult/impossible to obtain, & abortions are illegal.

To answer some of your questions OP.

Yes, I am grateful just to be here for this experience no matter how it goes.

A child exist is it always a good thing, regardless of the balance of ups and downs. My grandmother had my father on the day the second world war started. I can't imagine what was going through her mind. Despite the state of the world at the time she watched him grow up, get a job he adored and which served society, marry a woman he loved and raise a happy family. He had a long happy life (with all the ups and downs, joys and losses). He lived a full and fullfilling live.

No, I wouldn't go back in time if it gave me another 50 years. But not because of outside toilets, but because the people we love and they wouldn't be around me.

It's the people we love and who love us who make existence a good thing. This has always been the case, even when people only had a pot to piss in.

That is heartbreaking, I’m so sorry for you and your family.

I am so very sorry. There are no adequate words, but you are in my thoughts.

Absolutely! I dont think it's an either/or scenario either. Many things are better now, but that does not mean people were all sad all the time before, and nor is everything better now.
Listening to the birds and watching wildlife is also one of life's joys!

Exactly! There’s a lot of positives and in my opinion essential needs that mod cons can’t replace! But let’s wind our necks in, you know we are only simple folk 😉

I kind of get what you mean. I honestly don’t see the point of any life - as in if a great meteorite took every living thing out right now then so what. But whilst some living things remain then it means the rest of us want to remain also. I’m not fussed about existing - but for my dc. Not sure I am explaining it well. I just don’t see the point of living things at all.

@LadyMacbethWasFierce I am so very very sorry for your terrible loss.

I don't know if you have spoken to these people but they have really helped my family https://www.cruse.org.uk/. Their services are free. I will be thinking of you.

Now I'm completely convinced this is a wind-up! Only someone engaging in satire could claim to not be able to conceive why anyone who didn't live the exact same life as them would even bother to continue living, while accusing someone else of lacking empathy.
Hilarious, comedy gold!

I had wondered about this over the years myself and thought that on balance it would only be very exceptional circumstances that would render someone better not having been born at all.

Then 5 weeks ago my oldest daughter died, entirely unexpectedly, age 24. The pain I am enduring is so bad I feel I have been skinned alive. I am demented with grief at the loss of her and I truly wish I had never been born, never existed at all. This despite us having a really happy life before. All that previous joy is not worth the pain I am now in and I would end my life in a heartbeat to escape it, but I have to continue for now for the sake of my other children. I have been told the edges of the suffering will soften over time. Who knows. All I can say is that right now I just wish I could erase myself from existence.