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Original poster

"We're pregnant"

185 replies

IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 20:45

I hate it so much. No he isn't pregnant. Not even a bit. Yes he's going to he a father. He's expecting a baby. His partner is pregnant. How lovely that he's excited about it. What an amazing dad he's sure to be, but he is absolutely not pregnant!

I'm as grumpy as a middle-aged woman can get but this one really pisses me off. Pregnancy is a uniquely female experience. Why the fuck do men need to lay claim to it?

Do they experience morning sickness? Worry about the effects of the pregnancy on their career and earning potential? Be judged by all and sundry if they decide to have a thimbleful of wine or a slice of smoked salmon? Go through the risks and pain of childbirth?

Is it just me? (I expect so!!)

OP posts:
Scorchio84 · 11/12/2025 22:38

Oh no I can't cope with this either, it's beyond cringey

Delphiniumandlupins · 11/12/2025 22:36

It can be an acknowledgement that both lives are changing. That he's also giving up wine and soft cheese. That he's not just going to float through the next 18 years without any changes to his health/income/career. Obviously, a father has more choice whether to be affected than a mother does but a good partner wants to be involved.

Zov · 11/12/2025 22:28

IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 22:15

Interesting point re women saying it. Is it a form of internalised misogyny? An attempt to make the father feel more included? Pregnancy is an amazing thing which only women can achieve. Don't men have enough? Do we really need to big them up?

Show quote history

Oooh yeah it could be some kind of internalised misogyny... And maybe to make the father feel included... but yeah, we women have SO little that we can claim as our own FGS, why take this from us>?!!?? Angry

It's a bit like when the baby is born, all the relatives of the father of the baby start crowing about how the baby looks exactly like her/his father! Come on, it's a new born sproglet, it looks like NO-ONE (yet!) I don't know why they do this... Maybe it's a way to say 'it's definitely his, he is definitely the dad!!!' And a way to (try to) claim the baby as part of THEIR side of the family...

I'm rambling now, hopefully you get me! Grin

QuickPeachPoet · 11/12/2025 22:27

It's cringy and Americanised but not a hill I'd die on. DH used to say 'we're expecting' as he is Mr formal.

Original poster
IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 22:18

Rachie1973 · 11/12/2025 22:12

In addition…..

’we’ve decided on gas and air only’.

No jury would convict. Or would they? I'm starting to worry!

OP posts:
deeahgwitch · 11/12/2025 22:15

I hate it.

Original poster
IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 22:15

Zov · 11/12/2025 22:09

I do agree that it's a naff phrase, but I'm not sure I agree that men are laying claim to it. It's largely women who say it IME.

Just say 'we're having a baby.' 'We're pregnant' sounds stupid, and it's also factually incorrect!

Show quote history

Interesting point re women saying it. Is it a form of internalised misogyny? An attempt to make the father feel more included? Pregnancy is an amazing thing which only women can achieve. Don't men have enough? Do we really need to big them up?

OP posts:
Rachie1973 · 11/12/2025 22:12

In addition…..

’we’ve decided on gas and air only’.

Spidey66 · 11/12/2025 22:10

I think it’s cringey too.
she’s pregnant
theyre having a baby
hes not pregnant therefore ‘we’re pregnant’ isn’t correct!

Zov · 11/12/2025 22:09

IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 20:45

I hate it so much. No he isn't pregnant. Not even a bit. Yes he's going to he a father. He's expecting a baby. His partner is pregnant. How lovely that he's excited about it. What an amazing dad he's sure to be, but he is absolutely not pregnant!

I'm as grumpy as a middle-aged woman can get but this one really pisses me off. Pregnancy is a uniquely female experience. Why the fuck do men need to lay claim to it?

Do they experience morning sickness? Worry about the effects of the pregnancy on their career and earning potential? Be judged by all and sundry if they decide to have a thimbleful of wine or a slice of smoked salmon? Go through the risks and pain of childbirth?

Is it just me? (I expect so!!)

I do agree that it's a naff phrase, but I'm not sure I agree that men are laying claim to it. It's largely women who say it IME.

Just say 'we're having a baby.' 'We're pregnant' sounds stupid, and it's also factually incorrect!

Original poster
IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 22:07

Ghht · 11/12/2025 22:00

I f(28) with a 6 month old baby (feels like I was pregnant yesterday) absolutely despise “we’re pregnant”. YOURE BLOODY NOT THOUGH ARE YOU DARREN.

Excellent to have a younger generation on board @Ghht. I hope my late 20s DD feels the same. I expect so, I raised her. Stay in your fucking lane Darren!

OP posts:
OverlyFragrant · 11/12/2025 22:07

Whenever I hear a man say that I congratulate him on his ejaculation.
Conversation swiftly moves on.

CherrieTomaties · 11/12/2025 22:04

It’s a nauseating phrase.

Along with couples who call each other “mummy” and “daddy”. If they’re talking to the kids e.g “give this to mummy” that’s fine. But calling each other mummy and daddy when talking to one another - gross and cringe.

swingingbytheseat · 11/12/2025 22:03

Agree it’s up there with the cringiest of cringe fests

Original poster
IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 22:01

LavenderSweetPea · 11/12/2025 21:53

I hate it. It's cringe and it really minimises the effort, responsibility and struggle of the woman who is pregnant. You are NOT in this together as equal partners, one of you is doing all the work!

Exactly. Conception is fairly equal. Parenting can be (sadly often isn't) equal. Pregnancy is a woman/mother only venture.

OP posts:
Ghht · 11/12/2025 22:00

I f(28) with a 6 month old baby (feels like I was pregnant yesterday) absolutely despise “we’re pregnant”. YOURE BLOODY NOT THOUGH ARE YOU DARREN.

LavenderSweetPea · 11/12/2025 21:53

I hate it. It's cringe and it really minimises the effort, responsibility and struggle of the woman who is pregnant. You are NOT in this together as equal partners, one of you is doing all the work!

ACR7 · 11/12/2025 21:52

I agree it’s abit cringy. We did say we’re having a baby but not we’re pregnant. I earn more than my husband and am in a higher up position in the same industry but people who knew this would still always ask me if I was going part time or giving up work. Annoying.

Cantthinkofanewusernameffs · 11/12/2025 21:36

I just said this to my DS. 😂

No. We're not pregnant. We are expecting a baby, but only one of us is pregnant.

Glad I had my children before their father could lay claim to carrying them in his non existent womb.

VeryQuaintIrene · 11/12/2025 21:28

This childless old bat absolutely hates this expression!

Original poster
IngridBurger · 11/12/2025 21:26

Joolsin · 11/12/2025 21:21

You're absolutely correct, op, it's awful - I can't bear it either. I associate it with cringeworthy "gender" reveals, over the top baby showers ... and fathers-to-be assuming they have a majority opinion in decisions during the birth.

If my DH had tried to voice any contradictory opinion to mine during childbirth he'd have found himself unable to father any more!

OP posts:
CarrierbagsAndPJs · 11/12/2025 21:22

Totally agree.

Cat1504 · 11/12/2025 21:22

CraftyPlayer · 11/12/2025 21:19

Gives me the ick.

Me too

TwistedWonder · 11/12/2025 21:22

YANBU - it makes me shudder and cringe when k hear someone say that.

When a man pushes a human being out of an orifice , then ‘we’ can claim to be pregnant. Until then, let women get the credit on their own

Joolsin · 11/12/2025 21:21

You're absolutely correct, op, it's awful - I can't bear it either. I associate it with cringeworthy "gender" reveals, over the top baby showers ... and fathers-to-be assuming they have a majority opinion in decisions during the birth.