Is our postman a cheeky fucker?

Did you even read the first post? Did you understand it? Because that’s not what he said or what the OP had an issue with.

There’s no point in anyone trying to explain the concept of misogyny to you (or internalised misogyny if you’re female) if you’re starting with incorrect information.

Our previous postman did this all the time. "You must have bought the entire stock of xyz" and pretending to faint if there weren't any parcels for a while. He did get annoyed if we'd ordered glass Coca Cola bottles, and would say "can't you go to the shops for these?" as they're heavy (well no, because shops don't sell packs of 24 glass Coke bottles, no).

I didn't really care either way. But then a few neighbours (not us!) complained about him. They said he was becoming belligerent and always wanting to argue about the extra amount of work which online ordering had created.

We had a new postie not long after that, and he's been fine. Been 3 years now. Never saw the first guy again.

Might be unpopular but I don't actually consider this humour or making conversations. He has no buisness commenting on your parcels, surely there are other ways to make conversations that don't mention anyone's buying habits?

Op just fire back with 'well it keeps you in work doesn't it' job done, he wont ever speak about you again 🤣

I wouldn’t like it, not because I don’t have a sense of humour (I defintely do) but I hate attention on me so would hate to think anything that was being delivered was being scrutinised (I’ve sometimes had jumbo sized packs of loo rolls delivered and have always been silently grateful no comments have been passed (I just buy them to save running out for ages). 🫣

Posties hate parcels, especially at this time of year. He's trying to make light, neutral conversation in order to stop himself from snarling, "I wish you'd stop buying so fucking much stuff."

Brilliant 😂 Ah Caroline you are missed 😒

Quite..it is being up yourself, isn't it. Too many self-important people on MN with nothing better to do than get ' outraged' about absolutely nothing.

It must be quite a lonely sort of job, you're doing a large part of the process on your own. I don't blame posties for having a bit of a chat and laugh with the recipients, why wouldn't you? It's harmless really, nice for those that do like to engage with people (and not intended to intrude on the whole) and are sociable and friendly.

It would be a miserable world really if people stopped having random chats with others they see while out and about.

Having said that, I wouldn't be impressed with a courier/postie suggesting I needed permission from someone else to buy stuff. That would rankle, so fortunate that they don't!

WTAF

You are being so uptight! How can this bother you?

In the old days people were cheeky chappies. Now you cant open your mouth without people taking offence. I think he' s just trying to have a laugh.

It wouldn't bother me, I'm always amazed our postie restrains himself from commenting on the number of parcels I get (and at least he rings the bell and hands them to me, unlike bloody Evri)

Sexist joke with the husband, not funny, he will be telling you to smile next.

Hello, I've been a postie.

I cannot tell you the number of times when delivering a parcel, a man has answered with some variation of "what has she fucking bought now" with a guffaw. We laugh along. It's not funny but we're busy and don't have time to do much else.

It's standard banter that a lot of people have with their postie, along with the absolutely hilarious "if they're bills you can keep them" or "where are your shorts/you're wearing shorts in this weather?!"

If he's a fairly new postie he's probably had that banter 100 times with 100 people so he's just carrying it through, trying to get to know the people on his round. I can assure you he doesn't actually care and you're not the only person on his round or even on your street he delivers lots of parcels to.

"Oh, you order a lot of stuff dont you?"

"How dare you? you'd best check your Misoginy mr postman!!!"

Lol, what? how is a comment about the amount of post arriving at a house misogynistic, is this sarcasm that's not coming over well through text?

Do you even know what that word means or are you using it because it's a feminist buzzword?

Not at all. Why are you trivialising this ?

Are you implying women shouldn't challenge men when they ridicule and patronise them?

OP has every right to say this is not acceptable to her.

And take tomorrow off work to have an STI test.

I'm with you OP. I have a postman who always makes comments about what he thinks is in a parcel. Or about my appearance (have you been swimming or just got up?). Or about the fact I'm having my lunch (sitting around like Lady Muck).
I don't care if he's trying to be nice, I find it really fucking annoying.

So we now have to add postmen to the list of people who dare not even open their mouths whilst doing their jobs just because people love to embrace being outraged by... nothing?

It does sound a bit inappropriate, overstepping and sexist. People having a lot of parcels at Christmas, wow. Imagine if you bought stuff from Love Honey or Ann Summers, it would blow his tiny mind.

My dad was born in 1937 and was a postman and he would never have made personal comments about customer parcels. He was a shy man but had a good rapport with customers and had a lot of tips and bottles of wine at Christmas (which DM and I drank as he only liked sweet wine 😅)

I agree with OP, its rude because it has very misogynistic undertones. Oh lets joke with the poor man about his wife being a shop-a-holic.

Disgusting attitude really and not something I would put up with coming knocking on my door and then mocking me to my DH. Then my DH isn't a sexist and wouldn't join in with that type of offensive stereotype either so would be equally as confused by it.

Surely theres no way to even know what they are buying or who its for, its Xmas who isn't getting a lot of deliveries this time of year. Even if its in her name lets face it organizing all the little things that need ordering often fall to women too or they just wouldn't get done ('wife work' as mn lables it, another sexist trait of society).

A comment of 'oh, no parcels in a while I was starting to worry, have you been on holiday?' or something that references a change to frequency of deliveries to the house as a harmless joke and making polite conversation is one thing but saying to the husband 'SHE must have bought the whole shop' and 'I thought it was UNDER CONTROL' (as if you are doing something wrong)
is just sexist, ignorant and out of line.

Blimey, if every delivery driver / postman / postwoman I have heard making the same joke was reprimanded for this, there wouldn't be anyone to deliver anything at all.

Lighten up OP.

Why not get them delivered by Evri instead, who will probably just dump them on someone else’s doorstep - if my experience is anything to go by, that is…