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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is our postman a cheeky fucker?

232 replies

Sam9769 · 11/12/2025 11:02

I have just lost 3 stone in weight and decided to buy a new second hand wardrobe through Ebay. I will admit that I have been purchasing a lot of clothes etc.
Our postman keeps commenting to my husband about the parcels arriving on a daily basis. On one occasion he said to my husband "She must have bought the whole shop by now! The other day he said "There were no parcels for a few days, so I thought that things were under control!"
This is not even a postman we have known for many years, he's only been our postman for about 18 months.

I feel annoyed that he thinks that he has any right to comment on my parcels.
He's job is to deliver the mail and keep his opinions to himself.
Is he a cheeky fucker or AIBU?

OP posts:
NeverKnowinglyUnderstated · 11/12/2025 15:12

ClimbEveryLadder · 11/12/2025 11:43

I’m with you OP, he shouldn’t be commenting on your post and I believe this is against their code of conduct and training he’ll have received. Your DH should be shutting down this ‘banter’

Bet you're fun at parties!!

HeadyLamarr · 11/12/2025 15:01

Sam9769 · 11/12/2025 14:53

Thank you, it was no jabs!

Show quote history

Lost any sympathy with that comment. There is no hierarchy of getting healthier. However anyone does it is fine. It's the outcome that matters.

Specifying that you did it 'no jabs' is small minded and implying you are better than others who used jabs.

Isayitasitis · 11/12/2025 15:00

Runrunrudolph · 11/12/2025 11:17

Well i agree with you OP.

How condescending and patronising the guys talking about the little woman in that way.

I would be furious. And if your H is joining in with this patter I would be having words with him.

I can take a joke but this is the vibe I got too.

They wouldn't say it about a bloke would they?

It's funny first 3 times then piss off it isn't anymore.

ginasevern · 11/12/2025 14:58

For what it's worth OP, I agree with you. I'm old, so I've had a lifetime of male "banter" and a lifetime of being told to lighten up because the poor, dear man was only joking.

Iwantamarshmallowman · 11/12/2025 14:57

I think its rude .

NarnianQueen · 11/12/2025 14:56

I think it’s cheeky to say it to your husband! Little snitch 😂

Newsenmum · 11/12/2025 14:55

He wouldn’t say it if it was about your husband, so I agree with you op

Original poster
Sam9769 · 11/12/2025 14:53

Ennjaytee · 11/12/2025 14:46

Congrats on the weight loss! Hope it was a healthy and happy journey 😍

PS yes he is so rude! Absolutely not his place!

Show quote history

Thank you, it was no jabs!

OP posts:
User415373 · 11/12/2025 14:53

I don't think he's saying it about your weight loss. Maybe has hit a nerve though? My postie says it to me as I get vinted parcels all the time and I haven't lost any weight. Mine are also clothes for the kids but I just laugh, it's banter. I have a female postie that also has a joke about it. They're just being friendly I'm sure they're sick of saying it 100 times a day. But people will moan if they're not friendly enough.
He also comments on my husband's parcels as he orders lots of DIY stuff (hasn't he finished that job by now etc). It's just a joke.

Bambamhoohoo · 11/12/2025 14:52

WilfredsPies · 11/12/2025 14:38

I’m really shocked at some of the responses on here. It’s like some of you think that your mothers and grandmothers did all the hard work, won the war on sexism and now you don’t need to do anything more because we’re all equal and all treated fairly nowadays 🤦🏻‍♀️

But what do you actually mean by this? OP can tell him she’d like him to stop making jokes to her husband. She hasn’t done that. What else can she do?

it’s so trivial to get worked about up about something but only online- what’s the point? Unless she’s going to take action it’s a waste of emotional energy (which is, as we all know, the exhaustion of women in our world)

Original poster
Sam9769 · 11/12/2025 14:51

Bambamhoohoo · 11/12/2025 14:30

She didn’t report him did she?

Show quote history

I didn't report him. Unless posting on MN is a kind of reporting!!

OP posts:
HeadyLamarr · 11/12/2025 14:48

WilfredsPies · 11/12/2025 14:44

@HeadyLamarr

Again, not the same thing at all and not what the OP was talking about. You have a friendly, chatty postman. She has a postman who is commenting to her husband about her spending being out of control.

Mine comments to me about my adult son buying overpriced boxes of air, so I think it's pretty much the same. I don't mind, son doesn't mind ("I think he's find it's overpriced boxes of plastic crap, Mum") because it's just a lighthearted comment about how often he has to knock on our door.

Ennjaytee · 11/12/2025 14:46

Sam9769 · 11/12/2025 11:02

I have just lost 3 stone in weight and decided to buy a new second hand wardrobe through Ebay. I will admit that I have been purchasing a lot of clothes etc.
Our postman keeps commenting to my husband about the parcels arriving on a daily basis. On one occasion he said to my husband "She must have bought the whole shop by now! The other day he said "There were no parcels for a few days, so I thought that things were under control!"
This is not even a postman we have known for many years, he's only been our postman for about 18 months.

I feel annoyed that he thinks that he has any right to comment on my parcels.
He's job is to deliver the mail and keep his opinions to himself.
Is he a cheeky fucker or AIBU?

Congrats on the weight loss! Hope it was a healthy and happy journey 😍

PS yes he is so rude! Absolutely not his place!

JLou08 · 11/12/2025 14:46

It's a bit of humour, lighten up. I can't understand why anyone would be bothered by this.

AlltheJs · 11/12/2025 14:46

Blimey, poor fella out in all weathers delivering your parcels, being cheerful, making light-hearted conversation with your family members and you're complaining about him ???? Just lighten up and enjoy the fact that you can fit into the fabulous clothes he's bringing for you !

WilfredsPies · 11/12/2025 14:44

@HeadyLamarr

Again, not the same thing at all and not what the OP was talking about. You have a friendly, chatty postman. She has a postman who is commenting to her husband about her spending being out of control.

washingandcleaningtoday · 11/12/2025 14:43

If you like him - funny
If you don't like him - cheeky f*cker

Thedevilhasfinallycaughtupwithhim · 11/12/2025 14:42

I despair at what our society it headed towards if a post man can’t make a little joke about parcels without fearing for his job.

Growlybear83 · 11/12/2025 14:41

And in response to the suggestion that the same sort of comments would not be made to a man, my husband buys a lot of shoes - he is the male equivalent of Imelda Marcos. whenever I answer the door to the postie or Evri when they deliver more shoes, they tell me the parcel isn’t for me, roll their eyes, laugh, and say that my other half has been buying shoes again.

HeadyLamarr · 11/12/2025 14:40

He's just chatty (his name isn't Roger is it? if so, we share a postie).

Our regular postie knows everything and everyone, teases my adult son about his regular 'empty' parcels (Warhammer models, so bulky but light) and mentions he knows when the seed catalogues have been delivered because me and my three neighbours all get parcels from the same place that week.

He's bored and he chats. It's no big deal.

WilfredsPies · 11/12/2025 14:38

I’m really shocked at some of the responses on here. It’s like some of you think that your mothers and grandmothers did all the hard work, won the war on sexism and now you don’t need to do anything more because we’re all equal and all treated fairly nowadays 🤦🏻‍♀️

Growlybear83 · 11/12/2025 14:38

My postman is just the same, and so is the Evri driver. It’s a standing joke with them thst I get parcels on a daily basis. I enjoy the interaction with both of them, and also joking back thst I keep them both in a job. I think you sound incredibly uptight and humourless, OP.

ResusciAnnie · 11/12/2025 14:36

YABU - ask yourself why you care what the postman thinks of you.

fatphalange · 11/12/2025 14:33

If he’s not saying anything to you and only your husband, I’d be inclined to think it’s your husband but he’s blaming your postie 👀

Bambamhoohoo · 11/12/2025 14:30

Mapletree1985 · 11/12/2025 14:28

Someone made an honest mistake and you reported them? I understand you were bereaved, but how was the courier to know that? People are just trying to make a little human conversation and they're treated like criminals.

She didn’t report him did she?