Colleague spreading his stuff on my desk

Notyouthful · 2025-12-11T08:58:36+00:00

Have asked him many times not to do this. Currently in training so unable to move desks. When he went to the toilet I put all his stuff on his desk. He was upset on returning. Raised this with the development coach and she had a word with him. He still does this. What are we supposed to do with him?

Francestein · 14/12/2025 12:14

@RasiedByOwls I love your suggestion. Another could be putting it all in a box very clearly marked with “Free to a good home” and leaving it in the lunchroom.

RasiedByOwls · 13/12/2025 21:30

Next time he does it, you take a photo of all the stuff then hide it and list it on eBay. You then send him the link to the listing on eBay via email.

TON618 · 13/12/2025 20:54

Don't overthink this. Just tell him to move it and if he doesn't, move it back to his own 'territory'. I made a manager move his brown banana skin back over to his own desk. He apologised, took it to the bin and behaved more thoughtfully after that.

Elsvieta · 12/12/2025 11:41

Move it back, every time, and ignore any reaction. Unless he doesn't get the message after the first five or so times, in which case tell him it'll go in the bin next time - and follow through. You won't have to do that more than once.

Yamahahaha · 12/12/2025 11:30

grumpygrape · 12/12/2025 09:40

OP hasn't been back. Perhaps she has cleared her desk and left the office, and MN..... 🤔

Or perhaps she's been buried under her colleague's random crap.

grumpygrape · 12/12/2025 09:40

OP hasn't been back. Perhaps she has cleared her desk and left the office, and MN..... 🤔

outerspacepotato · 12/12/2025 00:18

I would either shove it right back the minute his stuff starts creeping and tell him his stuff stays on his desk or toss it in the trash. Depends on if I woke up mad or not. He's rude.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 11/12/2025 23:24

Francestein · 11/12/2025 23:20

@MrsElijahMikaelson1 - I owe you an apology. I don’t know how to edit. This was meant for @JudesBiggestFan. If you haven’t read my previous post @JudesBiggestFan, I would find your chaos intolerable to cope with. It’s not cute.

I did wonder what I’d done to piss on your chips there 🤣

Francestein · 11/12/2025 23:20

@MrsElijahMikaelson1 - I owe you an apology. I don’t know how to edit. This was meant for @JudesBiggestFan. If you haven’t read my previous post @JudesBiggestFan, I would find your chaos intolerable to cope with. It’s not cute.

toomuchfaff · 11/12/2025 22:25

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 20:26

Are you quite well?! As character flaws go, being a bit messy probably ranks better than being a sociopath who talks about giving people electric shocks! It’s a bank of communal desks, it’s actually quite easy to spread out inadvertently. It really is better to live in peace and harmony than take the little things massively to heart. I could easily lose my mind at people munching crisps next to me or making loud personal phone calls, but i choose to recognise I’m a bit noise sensitive and let it go. Life is too short to get stressed all the time. Save the anger for when people are being wilfully mean or cruel.

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I'm very well, maybe my explanation of consequences wasnt the best but my point being because you view the consequences (other people being annoyed and pissed off) as being inconsequential to you, you dont change your behaviour, even though you should.

Francestein · 11/12/2025 21:52

@MrsElijahMikaelson1 Have you had many complaints? I would find your drama intolerable.

Yamahahaha · 11/12/2025 21:38

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 20:26

Are you quite well?! As character flaws go, being a bit messy probably ranks better than being a sociopath who talks about giving people electric shocks! It’s a bank of communal desks, it’s actually quite easy to spread out inadvertently. It really is better to live in peace and harmony than take the little things massively to heart. I could easily lose my mind at people munching crisps next to me or making loud personal phone calls, but i choose to recognise I’m a bit noise sensitive and let it go. Life is too short to get stressed all the time. Save the anger for when people are being wilfully mean or cruel.

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It's not just "being a bit messy" though, it's repeatedly leaving your stuff strewn across other people's working space. That would drive me demented if it was happening all the time. You know you do it and you know people don't like it, so stop doing it.

Brendahollowayjustlookwhatyouhavedone · 11/12/2025 20:37

@MrsElijahMikaelson1 or more commonly known as a PITA.
I couldn't be bothered with the I'm so chaotic disruption especially first thing in the morning.

Nearly50omg · 11/12/2025 20:29

He wouldn’t do this to another man would he!

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 20:26

toomuchfaff · 11/12/2025 20:09

If being admonished involved an electric shock from unseen forces or something else that caused you pain or discomfort I'd be interested to see how quickly yoyr behaviour changed.

Because you view the consequences as inconsequential; I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk; your behaviour doesnt change and everyone around you has to put up with your unreasonable behaviour.

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Are you quite well?! As character flaws go, being a bit messy probably ranks better than being a sociopath who talks about giving people electric shocks! It’s a bank of communal desks, it’s actually quite easy to spread out inadvertently. It really is better to live in peace and harmony than take the little things massively to heart. I could easily lose my mind at people munching crisps next to me or making loud personal phone calls, but i choose to recognise I’m a bit noise sensitive and let it go. Life is too short to get stressed all the time. Save the anger for when people are being wilfully mean or cruel.

toomuchfaff · 11/12/2025 20:09

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 13:00

This is me! I am quite a chaotic person and I tend to arrive in a flurry, sit down chatting away, plug in my laptop while still talking and leave an array of lunch bags: chargers etc around me. Some people say to me very clearly…get your rubbish off my desk! Others more of my mindset barely notice and all our stuff mingles together! As with so many things in life, your personality will dictate how you respond. I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk but it doesn’t change my overall chaos and I get told off frequently. Office life will always bring its little bug bears!

If being admonished involved an electric shock from unseen forces or something else that caused you pain or discomfort I'd be interested to see how quickly yoyr behaviour changed.

Because you view the consequences as inconsequential; I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk; your behaviour doesnt change and everyone around you has to put up with your unreasonable behaviour.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 11/12/2025 19:34

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 13:00

This is me! I am quite a chaotic person and I tend to arrive in a flurry, sit down chatting away, plug in my laptop while still talking and leave an array of lunch bags: chargers etc around me. Some people say to me very clearly…get your rubbish off my desk! Others more of my mindset barely notice and all our stuff mingles together! As with so many things in life, your personality will dictate how you respond. I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk but it doesn’t change my overall chaos and I get told off frequently. Office life will always bring its little bug bears!

About time you stopped being a twat then. You know you do it, you know it pisses your colleagues off and you carry on. You are your offices bug bears and your colleagues hate it. Why do you think it’s ok to do that when you’ve been asked not to? You’re not chaotic, your thoughtless and inconsiderate.

StrawberrySquash · 11/12/2025 18:06

Yamahahaha · 11/12/2025 11:32

But there is someone next to him! He's not entitled to more space, and unless he has severe learning difficulties he must realise this. He can't just annexe the OP's desk. Does he think he's Vladimir Putin?

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Of course. But the insistence this was some sort of power play, rather than just someone on a cramped desk, was why I was explaining a possible motivation.

CaptainMyCaptain · 11/12/2025 18:06

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 13:00

This is me! I am quite a chaotic person and I tend to arrive in a flurry, sit down chatting away, plug in my laptop while still talking and leave an array of lunch bags: chargers etc around me. Some people say to me very clearly…get your rubbish off my desk! Others more of my mindset barely notice and all our stuff mingles together! As with so many things in life, your personality will dictate how you respond. I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk but it doesn’t change my overall chaos and I get told off frequently. Office life will always bring its little bug bears!

You must be an incredibly annoying person to work with - 'oh I'm so chaotic, I can't help it, it's just me'. Just behave yourself and get on with your work.

Lamentingalways · 11/12/2025 17:31

If you don’t like confrontation then tell HR that you feel slightly bullied. I think this can be a bit of a power play and difficult to say what his reasoning is.

Alternatively, spill a coffee on it.

FeralWoman · 11/12/2025 17:26

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 13:00

This is me! I am quite a chaotic person and I tend to arrive in a flurry, sit down chatting away, plug in my laptop while still talking and leave an array of lunch bags: chargers etc around me. Some people say to me very clearly…get your rubbish off my desk! Others more of my mindset barely notice and all our stuff mingles together! As with so many things in life, your personality will dictate how you respond. I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk but it doesn’t change my overall chaos and I get told off frequently. Office life will always bring its little bug bears!

Arrive in a flurry? What does that mean? You arrive late or you arrive thinking it’s okay to interrupt everyone else with your chatting? Perhaps you should stop chatting when arriving and try shutting up and arriving quietly, plugging in your laptop in silence and getting yourself organised and your crap contained to your own desk. Less talk, more keeping your shit off other people’s desks.

Bamfram · 11/12/2025 17:20

QueenArnica · 11/12/2025 09:07

OP I would ask him outright, “What do you hear when I say please stop putting your things on my desk?”

He’s either got to say that he’s heard exactly what you said in which case you can ask, “why are you not respecting a reasonable request” or if he claims he didn’t know you can take the opportunity to clarify again for him and check he understands.

I would then follow up with an email copying in a manager spelling out all the occasions you have spoken to him culminating in this last one when you have checked he has understood your request.

This is highly likely to be power play and you need to take yourself out of the game by asserting your boundary. Please don’t sucked into keep moving his stuff back, he’s not worth your energy and it’s probably what he wants.

Good luck!

This.
Not to be tolerated.
Document and report.
It is bullying harassment of you and an infringement of your space, designed to intimidate you.
Formalise your upset.

ChloeMorningstar · 11/12/2025 17:17

BauhausOfEliott · 11/12/2025 09:52

For the sheer weirdness value, I’m hoping it turns out that the bloke’s own desk is in a completely different part of the building and he’s not even in her department.

Or... the desk belongs to him and not the OP and she's confused - bit like the story where the person is confused about who owns the cake in the cafe...

ChloeMorningstar · 11/12/2025 17:14

Seeline · 11/12/2025 09:10

What sort of stuff is it?

I might just put anything I didn't need in the bin.... Clear desk leads to better work environment.

I think I would do this, clearly he doesnt need it, or it would be on his desk

ldnmusic87 · 11/12/2025 16:57

JudesBiggestFan · 11/12/2025 13:00

This is me! I am quite a chaotic person and I tend to arrive in a flurry, sit down chatting away, plug in my laptop while still talking and leave an array of lunch bags: chargers etc around me. Some people say to me very clearly…get your rubbish off my desk! Others more of my mindset barely notice and all our stuff mingles together! As with so many things in life, your personality will dictate how you respond. I take being admonished in good spirits and drag my stuff back to my desk but it doesn’t change my overall chaos and I get told off frequently. Office life will always bring its little bug bears!

Why don't you respect the space of others?