To think some people are taking life advice from dysfunctional people and wrecking good relationships?

I do wonder where this recent panicking is coming from

Exactly. It isn't women who are worrying.

We are either happily married and don't need to listen to randomised voices on the internet.

OR

Happily single.

No one leaves a functional relationship because someone we don't know says LTB on the internet.

@YourJadeLion if this is of a concern to you, chances are you're either a man who has been left or a bloke trying to control a woman.

Almost as common as accusing posters who disagree with OP as being bitter and single.

It’s weird you state she remained single as if it was a cautionary tale.

Unfortunately, all too often, 'work through' actually means learn to settle and put up with things - with the burden on this placed on the woman with the man just carrying on as before.

A friend of mine said to me, in her cultural background, a “good” marriage was often one where the husband was happy and the woman was enduring whatever it took to make the marriage work/last.

On the surface and to the outside world my exDH looked amazing! Generous, funny, successful, adoring. But the reality was that he was an alcoholic in total denial, a needy hypochondriac and unreasonably jealous and insecure. I did ltb. A year ago. And I’ve had the best year ever!!!

I don't think anyone's leaving a good relationship because someone told them to.

I do think these kinds of conversations sow discontent, and things that might previously have equalled a perfectly fine relationship, with a bit of give and take, begin to be seen as unfullfilling or overly demanding.

That may or may not be a good thing.

I agree with you, YourJadeLion. The government is full of them - liars, cheats, tax dodgers, frauds who surround the biggest hypocrite of all at the helm of a rudderless boat who all dictate "Do as I say, no as I do"

This!!!

Patronising and condescending as hell.

There seems to be a lot of public panic about women (and women alone) leaving partnerships they are unhappy with or choosing not to enter into relationships. Whether it’s the latest incel King, Scott Galloway and his panic about the impact of women’s preferences on men’s dating options or people like OP panicking over allegedly happy women, leaving allegedly bad relationships due to allegedly bad advice from allegedly “bitter and single” women (that old misogynist canard) I do wonder where this recent panicking is coming from.

See I used to think that too. But i don't know if it's because I've been here a while or just posts are getting worse. But I seem to notice more these days someone asks a simple enough question about 'AIBU to be annoyed my husband has gone out for the evening'. But then the background info to the relationship sounds like an absolute shit show! The actual problem they've asked about is the last thing they should be concerned with!

Is that happening?! If it is then I'd say if people are going to take advice of some wannabe carcrash on the Internet, then more fool them. And quite honestly, the guys in question have dodged a bullet.

Also you have zero idea what a relationship you are not part of is like

YABU.

erday 20:59
I’m seeing more and more women online and in real life leave loyal, supportive partners because someone on the internet told them they “deserve more” or “shouldn’t settle.”

This does not happen

LTB is a favourite on here.

Post about a happy marriage and you'll get told he's probably having an affair/will leave you/they're all the same etc.

Sad how even the littlest thing gets LTB comments when sometimes the OP just wants to vent a bit.

Are you Male or Female Op?

Yes this

But many husbands wouldn’t compromise, that’s the point. Lots of men want everything on their own terms, they’re old fashioned and don’t see marriage as a partnership. They fake it until they start to get bored (usually when children come along). They’re not prepared to sacrifice their hobbies. They don’t want to fulfil their share of the parenting. They expect their wives to run around after them like they are their mothers, and then wonder why they go off sex with them. They have no respect for their wives. They are completely thoughtless and self-absorbed.

Yet at the same time they’re not necessarily abusive. They might appear quite laid-back and jovial on the surface, and enjoy playing Dad for two hours on a Sunday or whenever it fits into their schedule.

That isn’t a marriage. It takes two people to make it work. Men are usually happy to check-out, but stay in the marriage as long as their domestic needs are met. Women shouldn’t have to stay in a lonely, desperately unhappy marriage while shouldering the sole burden of child-rearing just because her husband isn’t abusive.

We deserve relationships that are mutually rewarding. I’m old enough to know that men like this don’t change, no matter how many years and how much effort you put in hoping that things will magically turn around.

Hmmmmm I suspect you'd think I was one of those women.

When in fact, I loll happily on the sofa alone in the warmth of my quiet home of an evening (aka now) and do what ever the fuck I like.

I wouldn't have it any other way. I can do whatever I like, go wherever I want, and behave however I like.

I've been married. I've had another LTR. No thank you.

Fair enough, there is a lot of LTB on Mumsnet. But assuming women living alone are sad, pathetic and lonely is a massive misinterpretation. There is a reason the people who live longest out of all groups are single women.

I agree. People are expecting perfection without recognising they also have flaws that their partner overlooks. None of us are perfect.

Perfectly put @5128gap. I hate that women label happily single women as bitter or unfulfilled. I was married for a long time, had kids, and am now divorced/single and have never experienced contentment like it.

I agree

Leaving someone is a big upheaval. People don't do it without good reason.

No, not every day of course. But overall, yes it does.
My point was, people are generally capable of knowing if overall they are happy and fulfilled. If in the context of this, their partner does something that causes minor annoyance and they vent, on here or to friends, and are then told LTB. They are not going to do so. Particularly if the thing really is minor, in which case the views if the LTB people will be balanced by others advising otherwise.
I don't care what anyone says, There is no pattern of women ending happy marriages to 'supportive and loyal' men because 'lonely bitter' women on line are telling them to. Its arrant nonsense, not supported by evidence from divorce stats, or even by a single example where someone can prove this happened.

An ex colleague has just qualified as a life coach. Currently going through her third divorce and bitching non-stop about her ex all over social media.

An ex uni friend too. Now in her 40s but has never had a serious relationship or actual job, and is living off of her wealthy parents whilst making a pittance as an aspiring life coach.

And a woman at school has just qualified as a 'parenting coach.' Her DC are notoriously badly behaved, violent and rude, and she doesnt actually seem to do any parenting at all whilst they scream their way down the school drive in the morning, kicking and punching her.

I'm not sure any of these people are someone I would pay for advice. Who the hell is handing out these qualifications?

I think people are so exhausted they forget that for every annoying thing a dh does, they’ve their own idiosyncrasies and kooky things that their dh could leave them for. I was giving out about dh to a friend one day saying I wanted something one way he wanted it another and she asked ‘so did you come to a compromise?’ and I was so embarrassed, no we’d butted heads. I went home and said simply ‘I’d there a compromise to this?’ and we were laughing about it within minutes. Had someone said ‘boundaries’ or ‘he’s not respecting you’ etc I was so fired up I’d have opened a can of worms and we could be done! We’re not in an amazing place now but just giving an example