Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have asked my parents for a lift home?

620 replies

coldabdtired · 10/12/2025 19:08

I’m 25, and live at home with my parents. I drive but use public transport for work because it’s cheaper than parking.

tonight the bus home is delayed by 45 minutes. I worked 9-6:30, I was hoping to get on the 7:15 bus but it won’t be at my stop till 8.

i texted my family chat saying I know it’s cheeky but was anyone able to give me a lift if I walked to a different stop and got on a different bus because it was cold and I left the house before 7. My mum has come back and said that I’ve been really selfish to ask as they’re in their pyjamas but they’re going to feel guilty for saying no now because they know I’m tired and cold.

AIBU to have asked? I never ask for lifts anywhere, I drive or get the bus.

OP posts:
Beerlzebub · 10/12/2025 19:21

If I hand't had a drink, and was in my pyjamas, I would have just put my coat on and gone to get you.

HappySonHappyMum · 10/12/2025 19:21

I wouldn't have waited for you to ask - I'd have offered straight away. 7.15 is not even late!

StepAwayFromMyCrutches · 10/12/2025 19:21

How were you supposed to know they would be in their pyjamas at such a ridiculously early time? Is it far they would have to go to collect you?
I would definitely just pull a coat over pyjamas and collect my kids, even as adults, rather than leave them in the cold as long as I was able to get there.

Pollqueen · 10/12/2025 19:20

My kids are in their 30's and have families of their own and I still get called on to pick them up or take them places so yes, your parents ABU. I'd have just thrown a coat and uggs on over my pj's

Soashamed60 · 10/12/2025 19:19

coldabdtired · 10/12/2025 19:14

I think what’s annoyed me most is I give my family lifts a lot. Every week I drive my dad to golf, I was giving my mum lifts a week after I had surgery and I regularly get drunken calls from my brother to pick him up in the middle of the night. But nobody could drive 15 minutes to me

Show quote history

I'd cut down on the lifts. Let your brother fend for himself & pay for a taxi! They're walking all over you & are mean i'm sorry to say xx

Whereismyfleeceblanket · 10/12/2025 19:19

I usually pop to the train station 4 nights to pick dd20 up from her train home.
Because it's a nice thing to do!

ErrolTheDragon · 10/12/2025 19:18

Bloody hell. DH and I are nearly 65, we’d be out to pick up under those circumstances like a shot.

Someone is being selfish here, and it’s not you, OP.

Betty197 · 10/12/2025 19:17

I would without hesitation. For my daughter or husband. Just as hubby would for us. He drove 4 hour round trip the other day after a long day in work to collect us in the howling rain because our train was cancelled due to flooding

IfyouStealMySunshine · 10/12/2025 19:17

Very mean. Even if they didn’t want to come to pick you up to call you selfish for asking is well out of order.
I mean why wouldn’t you ask family in a situation like this on cold dark nights especially when you live with them.

NoXmasPudding · 10/12/2025 19:17

If I was home and able, I would have thrown my coat on as soon as I saw your text. I don’t understand parents like this I’m afraid.

DeanStockwell · 10/12/2025 19:16

It would be different if you'd been out on the razzle and it was 2am but understand your circumstances I think they are been mean .

FuzzyWolf · 10/12/2025 19:16

I would pick up my daughter and I’d also pick up any other family member or friend who needed a lift.

Soashamed60 · 10/12/2025 19:15

Wait until she's too old to drive & eeds a lift somewhere. You might have your own childten by then, so she'll have to get a taxi.

BruFord · 10/12/2025 19:15

I think that’s unkind, I’d put a coat on and pick you up.

muggart · 10/12/2025 19:14

she sounds a bit mean really.

Original poster
coldabdtired · 10/12/2025 19:14

Soashamed60 · 10/12/2025 19:12

Unless i was absolutely shattered myself I'd have just put a coat in & gone out in my pj's to fetch my dd. It's been a long day & its dark & cold. Families help each other out, even when you're over 18. You could have then done something nice for her in return

I think what’s annoyed me most is I give my family lifts a lot. Every week I drive my dad to golf, I was giving my mum lifts a week after I had surgery and I regularly get drunken calls from my brother to pick him up in the middle of the night. But nobody could drive 15 minutes to me

OP posts:
Bonden · 10/12/2025 19:13

Mean, selfish, lazy parents and tell them I said so!

Original poster
coldabdtired · 10/12/2025 19:12

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 10/12/2025 19:11

More context is needed. How old are they? What have they been doing today? Is there somewhere warm you could go to wait? How long would it take them to get to you? I’d probably be willing to put a coat over my PJs and come and get you.

My mum is 63. Not much today, she’s been retired a while and I think today was the day she was having lunch with a friend. Not really anywhere to wait unless I walked back towards work

OP posts:
Soashamed60 · 10/12/2025 19:12

Unless i was absolutely shattered myself I'd have just put a coat in & gone out in my pj's to fetch my dd. It's been a long day & its dark & cold. Families help each other out, even when you're over 18. You could have then done something nice for her in return

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 10/12/2025 19:11

More context is needed. How old are they? What have they been doing today? Is there somewhere warm you could go to wait? How long would it take them to get to you? I’d probably be willing to put a coat over my PJs and come and get you.

Swipe left for the next trending thread