To have asked my parents for a lift home?

I have an adult dc living at home. It wouldn’t even occur to me not to pick up from work if they were stuck waiting in the rain. Your parents sound selfish.

I would get my dd in those circs if I could but to be honest our text conversation would go like this.

"Hi mum, no buses"
"Shall I come to pick you up?"
"Don't be silly I've ordered an Uber - see you in 20 minutes".

I wouldn't have said no, providing I hadn't had a glass of wine but conversely, dd is 27 and wouldn't have dreamt of asking. So I think you and your mum are being a bit unreasonable.

I'd think fine for you to ask, fine for them to say Yes or No

Perhaps they would have said that though.

Just to say hope you got in okay and saw some of the horrible comments my goodness! I’m older than you, I don’t live at home but I would absolutely still text family for a lift in a situation like that and they would come to get me (or just respond nicely if they couldn’t) I thought families helped each other if they could.

I’ve just got back into bed after taking my son to work at 0630!
I’m 63 and work shifts, my son is 23 and isn’t driving yet.
My husband and I take it in turns to take him and pick him up!
Do we moan or mind? Not at all!!

I'm probably close to OP's parents' age. My parents often gave me lifts and would help me out when needed, not just absolute emergencies. And we do the same for our kids as yong adults. Of course, we all need to learn to be resilient if needed but part of a lovign relationship is also helping one another where we can.

Who wouldn't pick up a family member is this situation. Stop with the golf lifts op. Your parents sound very selfish

So your parents subsidise you?

My kids are grown up and live in their own properties but I would have dropped everything and collected them.
Don’t be available next time they need a lift. Hope you’re ok now it sounded miserable standing there so long. Can’t understand some people on MN having a go at you. Suppose it takes all kinds

The irony now is that my DM expects lifts everywhere when she never gave them when we were growing up!

Even if I was in my pjs, I'd say yes, pop on some joggers and pick dd up. It would be a non issue for me.
I'd scale back on the lifts you give to them op. They sound selfish.

My daughter is in her 40s and doesn't live with me but I have regularly picked her up from work and taken her home after work if its raining/cold. I am 69 and retired 2 years ago. She doesn't ask, I offer. Cannot bear to think of her trudging home in the rain. Sounds like you have done it for them so you are not being unreasonable.

OP, a tip I was given for dealing with a tricky boss might help you in future. Don’t set the scene for them by saying “I know this is cheeky” etc, you set them up with an out or a reason to complain. Simply state your ask, and leave it to them to decide if it’s unreasonable or not. I found that stopping myself giving outs (for example no problem if not I can xyz etc) changed the dynamic of interactions for me and perhaps could help you in future too.

Your ask was not cheeky. You say you regularly give lifts etc. It wasn’t very late. You had no reason to cushion it for them.

I hope my DC always gives me a call if I can do something that will help make their day a bit easier or more pleasant.

We would’ve been there like a shot OP. We’d do anything for our adult DC and they for us. I don’t understand parents like this at all. Hope you slept well.

i/DH would for sure. We (well, dh as I don’t drive atm for medical reasons) would pick up adult DC from the station/friends if needed. They are early 20s and we’re mid-late 50s so not much age difference.

This is 100% me.
When they are out late on big busy nights, like boxing day, NYE, I stay off the vino deliberately to be available to collect them and make sure they get home. We are urban but still getting taxis can be tricky on mad nights.
I always tell them text me to collect you as I will sleep better knowing you are safe. I would drop their friends home as well.
I just cannot fathom calling a child selfish for asking for a favour when they are stuck, after a long day.
Says so much about them, not the OP.
Parents wonder why children are a bit ambivalent of them when they reach adulthood?
Responses like that could be why.

They are just being mean!!! Star researching nursing homes on your bus journey home !

Thats poor of your family to be honest and your mum calling you selfish is a bit weird. You've asked for a lift, thats all. Just a no, sorry would have done theres no need for calling you selfish.
If asking for a lift isnt something you usually do (even if you did actually), mid December, cold, tired, been out the house since that early in the morning then I can't get my head around why there was no compassion to just say yes really. At any age id just want my kids home from work, especially if it's not something they usually ask for I'd definitely feel like they really needed it to be asking.

Hope you soon warmed up and slept well.

Start telling them no in return. Stop letting them walk all over you and ignore the absolute cranks on here calling you out.

My Dad would have picked me up anytime, he always promised me that. Sometimes my train would be cancelled so I'd get a train on another line after ringing Dad to see if he would mind picking me up from a different (local station) and dropping me off at my original station to pick up my car in the station carpark. He never complained, he loved me unconditionally and knew as a lone female who started worked at 7.30am in the morning I was tired and still had the horse to attend to after work.

He said I could ring him anytime day or night for a lift if I got into difficulties. I lived with my parents until I was in my early 40's and loved it. We were very close.

Wow - lacking in compassion there aren't they.

Next time they need a lift just say 'nah, I don't want to'. Ideally when they're standing in the freezing cold with a long wait to get home.

Are you not a bit out of touch? Many 25 year olds can’t afford to move out because of the cost of everything right now! I certainly am making plans in my head now for when my 3 year old can’t move out and is here when she’s 25

OP, this is not what I’d consider a supportive family at all.

Honestly, at 25, use this as a sign to double down on any long term housing goals you have. Get saving if you’re not already, learn about investing, find other young investors on Instagram, follow some podcasts like the Get Rich Slow Club.

It is good that they’re letting you stay at home at least, as housing is tough. But if you set your mind to it, use this as a trade off for the savings. I would also say though, if you do save and succeed, they’re likely not to be supportive of this either. There will be jealousy from your brother and your parents will think about increasing your board, so keep your plans quiet.

Families are tricky, but use living there for the trade off that it is, so if that still means driving dad to golf and biting your tongue, so be it. But he determined to succeed and one day, give your own kids lifts. Wishing you all the best.