Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Christmas card from neighbour..

231 replies

NewandBlue · 10/12/2025 06:55

Ive received a card from our neighbours two door down and it states all,the family’s name. To NewandBlue and husband from Pam, Pete, then also has their two adult children names on with their partners and kids names?

As it’s only Pam and Pete that are our neighbours I can’t see the point in putting all the families names on the card. Am I unreasonable?

OP posts:
SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 10/12/2025 12:52

I don’t think people are excommunicated from a family when they move out, @KilkennyCats - but I do think they start their own households, and will start sending their own cards.

When I moved out of home, I expected to take on the responsibility for sending Christmas cards etc myself - I never assumed my parents would carry on doing it for me.

But it is personal preference, and I know my way, my opinion isn’t the only one - I just know I am too knackered to add all the family names when I am writing my cards. I don’t bat an eyelid if someone does put all the family names in their cards.

CheeseIsMyIdol · 10/12/2025 12:48

KilkennyCats · 10/12/2025 12:47

It’s not the house that sends the card, it’s the family…
Nobody is excommunicated from a family when they move out of the family home.
You’re the odd bod for thinking otherwise.

Show quote history

Agree with this. Why on earth shouldn’t a card communicate greetings from the larger family group?

KilkennyCats · 10/12/2025 12:47

GirlSunshine · 10/12/2025 12:40

Well of course the only names appearing on an Xmas, Birthday or any other type of card, for that matter, should only be of the people living in the house it was sent from!

How very odd that you think otherwise...

Show quote history

It’s not the house that sends the card, it’s the family…
Nobody is excommunicated from a family when they move out of the family home.
You’re the odd bod for thinking otherwise.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 10/12/2025 12:44

When our dses were kids, I put their names on our Christmas cards, but now they are adults, and two have their own homes (ds3 is looking to buy his first flat), I don’t. Frankly it is enough work signing them from dh and me, without adding three sons, two DILs and three grandchildren.

GirlSunshine · 10/12/2025 12:40

tilypu · 10/12/2025 07:00

So cards should only be sent from people that live in the same house?

Is this some sly way of trying to extort more cards from people, so it looks like you have more friends? Or is this going to be the latest Hallmark campaign in order to increase sales?

Are you the CEO of card factory?

Well of course the only names appearing on an Xmas, Birthday or any other type of card, for that matter, should only be of the people living in the house it was sent from!

How very odd that you think otherwise...

mondaytosunday · 10/12/2025 12:40

I send cards with my kids (20&22) in them - my son doesn’t live with me and a number of recipients don’t know my kids at all. But it is my family wishing someone else’s family a happy Christmas so everyone is included. Though if my kids were married and had their own families I wouldn’t do it as I’d expect they’d be sending their own cards.

GirlSunshine · 10/12/2025 12:39

Well of course the only names appearing on an Xmas, Birthday or any other type of card, for that matter, should only be of the people living in the house it was sent from!

How very odd that you think otherwise.

Lurkingandlearning · 10/12/2025 12:38

You know you’ve spent more time on this post than it would’ve taken to just write out a reciprocal card, right?

You might come across other instances where people do things differently to how you do them, so my advice would be is try to remember that some people do things differently to you.

MrsVBS · 10/12/2025 12:37

I can’t believe you have nothing else to think about other than if this is unreasonable, it really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things, it’s the neighbours card she can write who she wants on it.

feathermucker · 10/12/2025 12:31

I cannot understand why this bothers you in any way at all, and certainly not enough to make a thread about.

paradisecircus · 10/12/2025 12:11

I write Christmas cards to people and include the names of their children who no longer live at home. Not that different a thing. You send cards to families; you get them from families.

Calliopespa · 10/12/2025 12:02

I cannot grasp how miserable and stingy some people are.

FunMustard · 10/12/2025 12:02

....So? You honestly gave enough of a shit about the ink wastage to post?!

CheeseIsMyIdol · 10/12/2025 11:58

HollyChristmas · 10/12/2025 07:07

We've lived here over 10 years and received a Christmas card the first year addressed to our house number " To new neighbours at No. 6 from Steve & Amy No. 23 "
So popped one in their door to them , obviously from our name .
Since then we have received one every year . We've sent back but tbh , even if I passed them in the street , I wouldn't know it was them , we've never met them !
This year we are not going to respond by sending a card and hopefully they won't bother next year.

Really??

FlyingApple · 10/12/2025 11:53

What a strange thing to be confused about.

Milsie892 · 10/12/2025 11:47

NewandBlue · 10/12/2025 06:55

Ive received a card from our neighbours two door down and it states all,the family’s name. To NewandBlue and husband from Pam, Pete, then also has their two adult children names on with their partners and kids names?

As it’s only Pam and Pete that are our neighbours I can’t see the point in putting all the families names on the card. Am I unreasonable?

Seriously??? Is this all you have to think about??

OldieWoldie · 10/12/2025 11:41

Just write neighbour's names plus family. That covers everyone.

lifeonmars100 · 10/12/2025 11:40

i am sometimes astounded by the things I read on here that seem to be causing issues

shhblackbag · 10/12/2025 11:31

Imagine overthinking this much. Must be exhausting.

SooticaTheWitchesCat · 10/12/2025 11:29

One of my neighbours sends a hand made card with all their children and grandchildren’s names. She also includes a letter saying what each of the family have been up to in the last year.
I don’t know her grandchildren but I read the letter as they are a nice family.
Complaining what someone has done kindly seems such a miserable Scrooge like thing to do!

KilkennyCats · 10/12/2025 11:28

NewandBlue · 10/12/2025 07:16

Just seems a waste of ink for a family I don’t even know 😂
Ive just put to Pam, Pete and family, it will have to do as I’ve lots to write out.

Show quote history

Oh, you’re not being a miserable grinch, you’re just worried about the cost of ink they’ve wasted.
I see.

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 10/12/2025 11:26

x post, sorry!

But I do love the post about the cat “writing “ the letter … shit like that just makes the day a little nicer. Like you say cringey, but also nice too.

Also agree the sending of cards to those you may never have spoken to on your street is just a nice neighbourly gesture, letting you know they are there in a fire emergency. We never know when we may need the kindness and compassion of strangers

KaleidoscopeSmile · 10/12/2025 11:25

Can you imagine being such a miserable fucker that you'd think there was something wrong with this?

Catladywithoutacat · 10/12/2025 11:25

I wish my life was this boring that I could get angry over something like this

Newbie8918 · 10/12/2025 11:24

The bastards!

(pointing out that this is sarcasm)