I have been thinking recently about what’s best for my kids, if there is a choice of more time with us/ me or more time in a child care setting / with grand parents.
My H and I have become accustomed to a nice lifestyle. Pre kids and now post kids as well. We have careers and high ambitions and expectations from life- financially speaking. We make good money, but we have the lifestyle and costs that come with it.
to follow my career and continue making the amount of money I made pre kids, meant I’ve had to travel sometimes / late nights/ use Nanny’s etc etc / not do pick ups and drop offs- you get the gist.
same with my H. We work around it to be able to maintain our high paid jobs and careers.
is it worth it though ? I could easily take a step down ( I’m considering ) and make a bit less, but be able to spend more time with my children. Yes, we’d need to make some sacrifices - but I think it’s worth it. We’d still have a good life, but just a little bit less money and a bit more time with the children.
I think this just makes sense. I don’t want nanny’s or grandparents to care for my kids on a regular basis because I can’t pick them up. Or for them to be at granny’s house when they’re sick.
I don’t want to do this anymore and I’m fine to take the hit financially. I make less than my H btw and I’m not saying I won’t work - but I’m looking to step into a less demanding role. You only get one life and I’m missing my children’s lives. They’re only young once. These years will pass.
Some people don’t have a choice, they can’t make ends meet. We have a choice. I could work a less demanding role and we could scale back on the extras and still be able to have a good standard of living.
I feel like I’ve been just plodding along, trying to make all this money and I’m hurting inside. I hurt to see my kids tell me they miss me and why can I not pick them up. I have a choice, I just need to move into a less demanding role.
they’re 3 and 5.
I know everyone will say, why doesn’t my husband step back ? It’s not about that. It’s about me. I want to step back. I want to be with my kids. They need me. Two big jobs are hard to maintain whilst having young kids- they suffer.
Since I’ve had kids I have had periods where I was in less demanding roles/ or briefly not in work and I am so much happier and so are they during those times.
recently I was made redundant and I’m therefore looking around again and really thinking what is the right thing to do now and I think chasing just the money just isn’t it anymore. Has anyone else done this ? Thoughts ?