£100 Christmas budget per teen, I feel awful

Very much support this!

We've had some ridiculously expensive things on teenage lists in the past and we’ve just laughed out loud!

Larger presents have always been for birthdays in our household when you only have one to buy for with smaller gifts at Christmas.

OP,I think there is a Facebook page specifically for 2nd hand musical instruments? Though I expect it will be the same items as on marketplace.

I bought my DD’s gifts in vinted and got quite a few things half price (new items).

I would be honest with our DC’s, they are old enough to understand, and I wouldn’t be afraid of landing their father in it by telling them he has decided to contribute nothing to the Christmas pot. My DC’s are over 18 now and their father decided now they are adults they don’t get gifts for Christmas. Both my DC’s have SN’s, the youngest is mentally about 10 years old and still expects Christmas presents so it’s left to me to pay for them. My eldest understands money is tight and has enjoyed selecting gifts from vinted and saving ££’s.

I hope you manage to find the items you are looking for at a reasonable price.

I think those saying use klarna or credit cards are thinking short term.

Do not get yourself into debt for Christmas!

Your children are old enough to understand. Explain to them you have a £100 and to pick what they want in that budget.

Since when has £100 per child not been suitable?

My two are getting £25 each as I just can’t afford it. Christmas isn’t about getting into debt. Thankfully they’ve not batted an eyelid.

I got this for my 15 year old as a cheap substitute for a polaroid. Much cheaper to buy and paper for it is cheap too
https://www.argos.co.uk/product/7815896

Your kids are old enough to understand that there isn't the money there for them to have all they want unfortunately. £100 per kid is a decent amount and probably more than many others will be getting this year

Well I for one think you are doing a great job. I was a lone parent so I know how it feels ( I still feel like it abd my DC is in their 30s). That’s a lot of money each when you are their sole provider so you are doing a great job. Thry have a lovely home with mum, are loved and cared for, have clothes and all the basics so well done to you.

you have two options as thry are older you could do a basic stocking say £20 each with little bits and bobs and they get the rest as money to buy the one thing they really want. You might be able to get out after Christmas and find something on a good deal.

otherwise and what I would do as I’m a bit more quirky I guess. I would start with the record player, I have a cheap as chips one from b and m of all places from a few years ago but plays the records fine. I’d get the record player and then an assortment of old records from charity shops ebay and so on. Including lots of Christmas ones. Then I’d have that all set up in the lounge for Xmas morning so you all have a lovely day playing the probably terrible Christmas records. That’s the present for everyone for Christmas and can then either stay in the lounge or come down every xmas and they both share it in their room. Then with whatever’s left I’d buy them one thing each so for one the skateboard or beauty stuff the other the books or beauty stuff. There should still be money left over so I’d then divide whatever’s left between them to go towards the next thing they are after. I’m imagining you all dancing around the record player now having a great day together. What great memories when they are older.

I think you need to put it into perspective for yourself. There are families who don't even have £100 to spare for Christmas and will be forgoing presents and using food banks.

I know you feel bad because it's the only time your children get big presents, but take the time to sit down with the kids and explain that you don't have as much money this Christmas and as such, you won't be able to buy the big ticket items and they can either adjust their wish list, or accept they may only get one big ticket item, which may be second hand.

£100 is a significant amount of money per child. I know it doesn't feel ideal but in reality, that's still a lot of money for presents.

Gumtree is good for second hand instruments too. You said you are rural where fewer items come up. Do you have friends in more urban areas who might be able to look nearer to them & get stuff to you?

You sound lovely. Their dad is a knob. Sit them down and explain. Are you ok for money for food? Could some of that budget be shifted over a bit? Do you or the girls have unwanted stuff you could sell to get some cash in?
Definitely put something on the local FB to see if anyone has a keyboard. Good luck x

I am fuming on your behalf OP. Why is everything left to the Mum, we have to absorb the stress,organise, pay and deal with the disappointment even if it's not our doing.
It's not as though Christmas is sprung on him ffs, he shouldn't be able to just withdraw all financial support, poor kids.
He should ask his family, use his credit card or sell something of his.What a crap excuse for a Dad.
Totally understand your frustration, it's also so difficult when their friends and the media portray this very indulgent time.💕

What about some small bits and pieces for them to open and enjoy and then £50 each to save up for what they want?

Op can you ask them to rate what they really want ?

It's not so bad honestly also my DD works one day a week and has several thousand saved up over the year. Your DD must be making ok money surely ?

It’s a bit late but have tried vinted ? I sell all DDs old clothes, trainers on there and it’s really easy to do and can easily make £50/£100. You can get a little money for old phones and tech too. You might be able to find a few things they want on vinted too I always check there before buying new, some items are new with tags just cheaper. I got DDs beauty bits Black Friday saved a lot there but again might be a little late. You are not failing them at all it’s hard being a single mum, and they are old enough to understand too so ask them to prioritise then work from there xx

is your DD after specific beauty items OP? I have a couple of makeup bits I won’t use from an advent calendar that I’m happy to send, Revolution type brands. I’ll only be sending them to the charity shop otherwise

Check with your ex if he can contribute anything at all.

Talk to the girls, explain the budget is tighter than you thought and ask them to prioritise what they would really want.

Look on FB marketplace, ebay and vinted for second hand stuff.

If no luck, can you save and get some of the things in the new year? Give them some IOU vouchers instead and see if any come up in the sales/you can save some money for some of the bits.

I realize you said you are rural, but do you have a Buy Nothing group on Facebook for your area?

You can put out requests; someone might have a digital piano sitting around and be willing to give it.

To me, a vinyl record player AND a Polaroid camera AND trainers is a lot. I'd get the record player and the trainers; the camera is a novelty item that soon loses its charm, plus the film (or whatever it's called) is expensive.

OP I hear you. It’s harder now as you thought you had the higher budget and allowed them to write lists etc- had you known you’d have £100 budget you would have approached it differently and now you have to go back to them to discuss which makes it really hard.
I also agree that £100 is limited and £300 isn’t crazy especially for teens. We don’t go made but I’d really struggle to get my kids decent stuff for £50 to be honest and im inpressed people do! Mind you its a lot cheaper for small kids to get cheap bulky items.
I wouldn’t get into debt unless you can easily pay it off but instead sit with them and say this is the budget, I am happy to spend it on whatever you want but tell me what to prioritise/what are you happy to have 2nd hand etc.

Have you asked on fb for a keyboard etc? I advertised mine a few years ago and it was snapped up within the hour by a friend whose child was learning. Complete with stand and original box

Ask their dad to contribute a smaller amount if he can’t afford £200 each, or can he buy them both a few presents?

Keep checking FB marketplace (unfortunately it’s quite close to Christmas now) or vinted.

If not I’d tell them the truth and they can prioritise what they really want.

I’m sorry he’s let you & the kids down OP, that’s really shit, especially this close to Christmas when you don’t really have the gift of time to try and get some extra money together yourself.

I can understand people saying £100 is a lot of money still, and it is, but for teenagers £100 really doesn’t stretch very far so I totally get where you are coming from OP.

I would try to maximise the budget as much as you can by looking second hand as others have said, and see if you can find any deals. Are they specific about what “beauty stuff”, as in a brand, or is it just “skin care” or “make up”? If it’s general stuff then I’d have a look at the offers Boots do 3 for 2 so you could save a bit there, or keep an eye on their £10 Tuesday deals as there can be some great bargain’s there.

Do the trainers have to be a particular brand, or is it just a “look”? For example the New Balance trainers are expensive, but if it’s the look of them rather than the brand she’s bothered about then places like PLT have some that look very similar for a fraction of the cost (and they currently have a sale on).

Polaroid camera, have a look on Vinted, there are some on there ranging £10-30, quite a few so definitely worth a look.

Have a look on FB market place for electric piano. I sold one on there not long ago for around £50. There were loads on there when I sold ours. So many on there are practically unused as kids think they want to learn the piano but then not willing to practice (well that’s how it went with my kids anyway!).

I may have an unused vinyl record player in my basement. An unwanted gift for my husband a couple of years ago. I’ll go down later and see if it’s still there. If it is I’ll DM you as you would be welcome to it for free.

https://www.vinted.co.uk/items/7717518809-crossley-portable-record-player

https://www.vinted.co.uk/items/7734539280-polaroid

https://www.vinted.co.uk/items/5881840325-polaroid-supercolor-635-camera-vintage-instant-camera-not-tested-with-case

https://www.vinted.co.uk/items/7732017050-oyayo-folding-88-key-piano

Including quite a few pianos at reasonable prices but not sure if it’s the correct one you are looking for.

OP I’ve just had a quick search on Vinted and can see some of the items you are looking for on there. Have you had a look? You can really get some bargains.