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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you honestly what are your first thoughts on seeing this?

644 replies

gemful · 09/12/2025 11:44

NC’d for this

A couple. 2 dc (no childcare)
A brand new, new build house. Mortgaged.
Two brand new cars.
They don’t dress designer but the present well.
She has a few designer handbags.
gadgets are always good brands, latest I phones, shark hairdryers, robot hoover.
very organised and tidy home, both work full time in good jobs.
They do family outings every few weekends but not every weekend.
Honesty, what are your first thoughts?!

OP posts:
SleeplessInWherever · 09/12/2025 13:43

YaWeeFurryBastard · 09/12/2025 13:38

Yes, seriously. I’d think it was unfortunate that their kids were in after school club or left to get on with their homework on their own every day and that they couldn’t afford to work less.

What do you mean modelling an expectation? That a new car takes priority over time with family?

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They may not want to work less?

My partner and I work circa 100hrs a week between us, and neither of us would want any different.

We’re not all forced into full time work, a lot of us choose it.

SleeplessInWherever · 09/12/2025 13:42

SJone0101 · 09/12/2025 13:33

He would have to earn at least £60k, if not more.

£7k take home a month wouldn't be enough for this lifestyle.

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Wouldn’t it?

If you have no car on finance, no childcare, surely you’d have a disposable income of a few thousand a month. Which you could easily spend on bags.

EmiliaPresident · 09/12/2025 13:41

Apparently I can’t read. 🤣

EmiliaPresident · 09/12/2025 13:40

They’ve got fairly decent jobs and no kids. Not out of the ordinary but nice for them

YaWeeFurryBastard · 09/12/2025 13:38

Slightyamusedandsilly · 09/12/2025 13:20

Seriously? Adults work. They have flexi time.

It's about modelling an expectation for your children.

Show quote history

Yes, seriously. I’d think it was unfortunate that their kids were in after school club or left to get on with their homework on their own every day and that they couldn’t afford to work less.

What do you mean modelling an expectation? That a new car takes priority over time with family?

AgnesMcDoo · 09/12/2025 13:38

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 13:31

That's quite a low income tbh. Surprised you manage to get what you have, does your DH earn similar?

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Low income?

OP earns twice the national average salary.

MarymaryquiteC · 09/12/2025 13:37

Screw your neighbour, sister and friends. Next time they saw, a don't know, "wow, another handbag", just reply, "I know right, isn't it gorgeous!!" Etc etc. Enjoy your life and fuck everyone else.

Firstbornunicorn · 09/12/2025 13:37

I would think they were wealthy, because most people I know do not have all of those things. I wouldn’t hold it against them, or anything. I’m sure it’s nice for them. I would get a bit annoyed if they constantly drew attention to their new car, fancy hairdryer etc.

AgnesMcDoo · 09/12/2025 13:34

Honestly @gemful you sound just like my family - except for the designer bags - not my thing. I'd rather spend that money on extra holidays, and do.

Your neighbour and others making mean comments are jealous. That's sad.

SJone0101 · 09/12/2025 13:33

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 13:31

That's quite a low income tbh. Surprised you manage to get what you have, does your DH earn similar?

Show quote history

He would have to earn at least £60k, if not more.

£7k take home a month wouldn't be enough for this lifestyle.

Balab · 09/12/2025 13:33

I would think nothing.

MaidOfSteel · 09/12/2025 13:33

Where I’m from you’d not be an average family; you’d be considered very well off indeed.

You must have a very high household income to be able to save so hard. And buy designer bags, hairdryers that cost 20 times as much as a regular model etc.

Not average in the least.

Evergreen21 · 09/12/2025 13:32

Tbh what stands out to me is your sister is not your friend.

We all earn different amounts as siblings and live quite different lifestyles. Neither of us overshare in a bragging way but we are happy for each other although none of us are struggling. I have a dear friend in a completely different tax bracket from me who never shares holiday snaps, I mentioned it once and she said it might come across as bragging and tone deaf so she doesn't. I appreciated on social media it might come across that way but not to me. She now sends me a slew of photos of the food they eat on holiday and I love it because I love her.

So my advice would be tell your sister bluntly to stop asking questions she doesn't want to know the answer to. Otherwise live your life and enjoy it, you really don't have to justify your purchases to anyone.

MarymaryquiteC · 09/12/2025 13:32

I'd be minding my own effing business. 🙄 You really have time on your hands.

myglowupera · 09/12/2025 13:32

I would think they live a different life to me.

Penisbeakeralltheclassics · 09/12/2025 13:32

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 13:31

That's quite a low income tbh. Surprised you manage to get what you have, does your DH earn similar?

Show quote history

Oh give over. OK you might earn a lot more, but it’s not that shabby.

WatchThisGladys · 09/12/2025 13:31

Presumably the kids are teenagers if their parents work fulltime and have no childcare? The family are clearly well-off and look to be managing everything well, but that description makes them sound a bit bland.

DoubleHardBastard · 09/12/2025 13:31

gemful · 09/12/2025 12:35

Honestly I don’t brag, I don’t feel any of it is worth bragging about. My sister and friends will visit and have said things. My sister especially, she asks a lot of questions. I have argued with her on this. 😭 she asked me what I earn and nearly had a heart attack. I earn 62k. She said she assumed I was on half that. I try not to talk about money tbh.

That's quite a low income tbh. Surprised you manage to get what you have, does your DH earn similar?

Pavementworrier · 09/12/2025 13:30

What is "dress designer"? If we are doing knee jerk reactions I assume the op is into tiktok and made in Chelsea

Conniebygaslight · 09/12/2025 13:30

I don't understand your question OP...thoughts on what?

Penisbeakeralltheclassics · 09/12/2025 13:30

I would hope they have a pension… but that’s my job 😁

Superfoodcrisps · 09/12/2025 13:28

Middle class family. Most likely household income in the £100-£150K/year range
but could easily be outside of that range.
Could be any range of financial circumstances from credit card debt and opting out of pensions to no mortgage and significant pension and investment wealth.

LittleMi55Nobody · 09/12/2025 13:27

beefthief · 09/12/2025 11:46

This seems entirely normal unless you're going to drip feed that it's actually Fred and Rose West

isnt fred west dead lol

BlackberrySky · 09/12/2025 13:26

I'd think they have different priorities to me because I think Iphones and designer handbags are a waste of money, but other than that not much else. Whether or not your lifestyle is remarkable probably depends where you live and who you associate with. If you're the wealthiest in your family or social circle, people are more likely to comment on it.

I always think you never know what's going on financially behind the scenes. Two people can have outwardly similar lifestyles but one could be comfortably affording it and the other in massive debt.

peachesarenom · 09/12/2025 13:25

I'm thinking 'I wish I had a organized and tidy house!'