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Original poster

Hearts on WhatsApp

111 replies

Nayoryay33 · 08/12/2025 20:03

A dad of ds friends. Put a heart on our whatsapp convo.
The kids have known each other for a few years but became close this year. My ds went over for a sleepover at theirs a month ago. His wife is a nurse and works nights. He was at home with the boys. Very good communication, reassured me and ds all is well. Update at 11pm when ds fell asleep.

Now today, the boys went to an activity. Got dropped off by friends grandparent. I texted the dad saying i can pick them up. He replied "Oh that's amazing ❤️ Let me know if you need any help with that 😊"
Coming from the mum i would think its normal. From the dad?! Do dads communicate with hearts on WhatsApp normally? Am i being unreasonable in thinking he's being too familiar?

OP posts:
Randomlygeneratedname · 09/12/2025 06:42

I have gotten so used to heating everything that I have to actively press thumbs up when responding to my boss. Equally, even though I'm aware of it, he has had more than his fair share of love hearts from me 🤣 luckily his wife is a very good friend of mine so knows how I text/communicate and wouldn't think anything of it.

Kitterkitkat · 09/12/2025 06:38

My male friends do this? Never thought anything of it. The females do too

Squishedpassenger · 09/12/2025 06:34

Iseeyou99 · 08/12/2025 20:45

He could have form for being a wandering eye sleazeball. OP responds in the same way., friendly love heart for example, completely innocently, he could get the wrong idea.

Other mum looks at his phone and sees heart, knowing he's a wandering eye guy who she already feels uncomfortable about - she could have a huge problem thereafter with OP.

Let's not pretend this crap doesn't happen.

If some guy sends me a heart emoji - married - I would be cautious until I had absolute proof not to be. I would be as formal and emoji less as possible. And I am a regular heart emoji user.

She isn't overreacting - she's being sensible.

Edited
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Do you live on Albert Square?

Amberjane41 · 09/12/2025 06:27

Definitely over thinking. The heart after the word amazing means he loves this and is showing gratitude and the smile at the end is just a smile to finish the message which is friendly. If the two emojis were reversed and he ended the convo with a heart then that would have been weird but in this context definitely normal 😊

neednotknow · 09/12/2025 01:35

StepAwayFromMyCrutches · 08/12/2025 22:38

Please tell me this is sarcasm.

I could not live my life over interpreting every emoji as some sort of test rather than simply a different texting style.

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I dont know.

I think it would be boring to never to look beyond the surface of how people communicate.

It's called subtext.

Apparently quite a lot has been written about this, almost like its a known area of linguistic research.

Probably too exhausting for you though.

Pistachiocake · 08/12/2025 23:44

ElizabethVonArnim · 08/12/2025 20:07

I use hearts if a thumbs up might seem a bit rude or dismissive. I’ve never used it for anything more than general warmth. Don’t overthink it.

Exactly, though now we're told that thumbs up is boomer rude and a smiley face is passive aggressive, and to think about what the colour of the heart might mean...probably quicker to use words.
Seriously, I wouldn't worry OP. If a mum used it, as you say, you wouldn't mind, or assume anything, and obviously it would be just as possible for a mum to be attracted to another parent as it would be for a dad to be. On some channels, hearts are the only option, so we are just probably more used to them. The American mum at nursery used to find it weird that we ended messages with x.

rhabarbarmarmelade · 08/12/2025 23:41

I know so many men who use hearts, including ones who I only know formally. Wouldn’t give it another thought,

soundsys · 08/12/2025 23:39

Clefable · 08/12/2025 20:06

Eh? He’s ‘hearting’ the fact you can pick them up, not you personally.

Entirely this!

At least, I hope this is the correct/sensible/widely accepted use of the heart, otherwise a lot of random school parents/colleagues think I'm in love with them!

Franjipanl8r · 08/12/2025 23:35

You’re acting like he sent you an aubergine emoji! Chill out, men send emoji’s too!

randomchap · 08/12/2025 23:13

As long as the rest of his communication is straightforward and in no way dodgy it's fine.

If he's all flirty then it's an issue but the hearts themselves are not flirty on their own

Endorewitch · 08/12/2025 23:10

To me the heart is for you picking them up. Heartfelt thanks.
I wouldn't think twice about it.

RobertJohnsonsShoes · 08/12/2025 23:08

Sorry that’s weird. I communicate with my sons best mates dad and it’s usually one line , no punctuation and certainly no hearts 😂

Iseeyou99 · 08/12/2025 23:06

flatfootedfred · 08/12/2025 22:54

It must be absolutely exhausting to over interpret like this.

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Are you a man?

You are telling me I am over interpreting by advising an OP to listen to herself when she feels some caution regards how a complete male stranger is communicating?

Do you usually employ this type of language with people in your life? Does it tend to work well for you?

snugasabug75 · 08/12/2025 23:06

You're way overthinking this OP

Infracat · 08/12/2025 23:03

CypressGrove · 08/12/2025 20:07

Totally normal. Men put hearts on teams messages at work all the time - 'l'll send the document at 3pm' gets a heart these days!

I was going to say this too. Happens at work on Teams all the time.

OhDonuts · 08/12/2025 23:02

RacingAcrossTheSofa · 08/12/2025 22:58

Thumbs up is passive aggressive?! I use it all the time. Guess I need to get a bit more liberal with my use of hearts…

I hate receiving the thumbs up, always hated it and never use it. When I see it it feels like the person is saying “ok then. Fuck off”. I don’t know why it gives me that vibe!

RacingAcrossTheSofa · 08/12/2025 22:58

Thumbs up is passive aggressive?! I use it all the time. Guess I need to get a bit more liberal with my use of hearts…

OhDonuts · 08/12/2025 22:55

In the context of the message I would have read it to mean he loves the fact you will pick them up. I think the “let me know if you need help with that” was poorly chosen words, but I would read it as “if anything changes that plan let me know”. I always add a smiley face at the end of texts to seem friendly/happy with what had been discussed.

flatfootedfred · 08/12/2025 22:54

Iseeyou99 · 08/12/2025 21:18

You are not unreasonable to be cautious. You aren't claiming he's planning to leave his wife.

You are absolutely rightly cautious. It could be a mistake, it could be an accidental emoji. Whatever it is - keep your bloody distance in comms OP. Trust yourself. Something is saying be cautious, so listen.

MN posts could convince you of anything. We have a problem with posters continually invalidating a posters feelings. We had a thread about how rife this invalidation on here is only recently.

We are right to feel cautious and uncomfortable about men's intent unfortunately.

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It must be absolutely exhausting to over interpret like this.

flatfootedfred · 08/12/2025 22:51

Are people quite mad? It’s a message about childcare logistics FFS, he’s not making a pass at you.

Hattieandcake · 08/12/2025 22:48

I read the heart to be about the kids arrangements not you…

StepAwayFromMyCrutches · 08/12/2025 22:38

neednotknow · 08/12/2025 21:16

you're not colleagues though and this isn't teams

you should trust your gut and your pattern recognition

his wife is gone all night

you're single he knows this

this is escalation

he didnt 'like' the message with a heart

he added it to the main message 'blah blah blah ❤️'

he could have gone 🙏🏽 or nothing at all

im pretty sure he knows the difference

he is testing the boundary

Please tell me this is sarcasm.

I could not live my life over interpreting every emoji as some sort of test rather than simply a different texting style.

StepAwayFromMyCrutches · 08/12/2025 22:33

Nayoryay33 · 08/12/2025 20:57

Well i guess thats it. I wouldn't want the wife to see me sending love hearts to her husband.

I don't know this couple too well. Like i said the mum works nights at the hospital so i mainly communicate kids stuff with the dad because he works office hours.

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So don't send any. Problem averted. Keep it at a communication level you are comfortable with.

wheresmymojo · 08/12/2025 22:27

I get heart emojis from men in their 40s on Teams in my very corporate job to mundane messages about having slide packs ready and such

WimbyAce · 08/12/2025 22:26

My male colleagues use hearts with me on teams and they def don't mean it in the romantic sense 😅 It's just nicer than a thumbs up I guess?!