Would you tolerate DP spending £7k on World Cup trip?

I’d be more concerned about him missing his DD’s birthday.. that would upset me.

I was about to ask is he Scottish. If he is in the Tartan Army and followed for years thing I can see his point. If he is a glory hunter then he can watch it in the pub! I know some friends are making it a family holiday. Child is 2 so wont know what day is actually birthday yet. I'm considering annual Leave due to time difference to watch at home. I've done my time on the terraces to enjoy this moment

The 'declaring' part would be the issue for me. Aside from the obvious financial aspect, he's decided you're solely looking after your daughter for those 10 days, and will miss her birthday.

A couple of weeks back, my DH mentioned he was considering buying a new (less than £7k, but still quite expensive) laptop from savings. I wouldn't have noticed if he had done, but I appreciated that he wanted to know my thoughts on it before he just went ahead and did it. He wouldn't have considered doing it if it meant getting into debt, or if the money wasn't there for me to spend a similar amount on something.

If you can do comparable things for yourself, then I think it’s fine.

Just go on holiday alone, same as him!

As long as he paid his due, as in what he should be paying for the upkeep of the home - that you and your child arent having to cut back - let him go with good grace

Im planing a walking holiday for myself - 2 weeks - without DH. To be able to do this I have to save for my break, and for home care for my mother so no one is inconvenienced, so their lives carry on, and I get the holiday I want

Yeah I can see why you may be disappointed that hes not there for your childs 2nd birthday, but I mean this kindly - its you that's going to notice, not your child

Depends if he's Scottish then no. It's been almost 30 years since Scotland was last at a world cup. That's an experience of a lifetime for some. If I had the money and childcare I'd be going

I’d be livid that there was no prior discussion on who is taking care of the children and he just assumes you will? I don’t get separate finances with married couples so I guess you can’t say anything about that as it’s his money but I’d be wanting to know what childcare arrangements he’s made.

I don't think in your position as a couple that he should go although I understand how much he would want to.

But aside from that, how carefully has he estimated his costs? I have been looking at Boston hotels today and they are very booked up and very expensive for what's left. I think it will end up costing more than he thinks. 10 days also seems a lot for two games that are 5 days apart.

Could you compromise and he goes over for 3-4 days and sees one game?

Does it mean you don’t be able to then afford to have a have a family holiday?
I’d be fuming if that was the case

It's definitely a passive aggressive move on his part.

It’s not like Scotland qualify very often. I understand his desire to go if football is his thing (it’s not mine, lol), it’s likely a once in a lifetime thing. It’s a lot of money though. As you have separate finances, I guess it’s up to him if he can fulfill all his family obligations and still go..

I'd tell him that you have spent 8k (similarish proportion to income) to book a solo holiday for 10 days and he will be responsible for house and child care during the period. I can guarantee he is not gonna be happy about it.

For me this, unilateral decision to spend this amount of money, going into debt for a holiday, leaving you at home alone for 10 days, would made me consider if this was a relationship worth staying in.

I dont think there is anything wrong with solo travelling or spending money to travel when in a relationship with kids but once you have kids non work related overnight trips, and spending or borrowing bigger sums of money (more than few hundred) on anything non essential (e.g fixing a car you need to go to work would be essential) becomes a joint decision even if you have separate finances.

He's being selfish scumbag who doesnt care about you or his kids.

Trump looked like a toddler being given a large Christmas chocolate coin when they gave him that ridiculous medal.

He sounds like a petulant man-child. How dare you give birth to his child during a football tournament. Maybe if he grew up and had some savings, then his case would be stronger.

What age is this man to work full-time and not even have £7K in savings? Is he always so useless with finances?

Me and DH are planning going over to watch Scotland (probably from the fan zones) as realistically, it is a once in a lifetime opportunity! He went to the euros last year and absolutely loved it. However, we have the money in savings and don’t have children so aren’t sacrificing anything to go - though it will be our holiday next year, I am happy with this as we have decided to combine it with another US city that I want to visit.

I wouldn’t be getting into debt to go, as much as I realise how important it is to Scottish fans. I don’t think the birthday is a big deal though, at 2 she won’t have a clue what’s going on! You could celebrate when he’s home or before he goes and she’d be happy.

Me and DH are planning going over to watch Scotland (probably from the fan zones) as realistically, it is a once in a lifetime opportunity! He went to the euros last year and absolutely loved it. However, we have the money in savings and don’t have children so aren’t sacrificing anything to go - though it will be our holiday next year, I am happy with this as we have decided to combine it with another US city that I want to visit.

I wouldn’t be getting into debt to go, as much as I realise how important it is to Scottish fans. I don’t think the birthday is a big deal though, at 2 she won’t have a clue what’s going on! You could celebrate when he’s home or before he goes and she’d be happy.

Missing a two year olds birthday isnt a big deal IMHO. Yes he should go if that's what he wants and he has the cash. And won't leave you short of money.

just read the update, he is selfish and immature and seems to have no care for the family unit. He needs to grow up

Make sure you go on holiday with your child alone. 100% refuse to fund him.

I'm sure he will be too, but I'd have guessed they aren't sharing rooms?

I'm guessing Op and baby might cramp his style ... but too bad. He can make this work for them both. OP doesn;t need to go to the games. I'd take a couple of day trips to Providence and Newport if I were her.

what a bunch of bollocks

The Copa America 2024 wasn’t without it issues either!

The final was massively delayed due to crowd control as well

and the amount of games stopped for weather issues

they are also still building the infrastructure as well having 64000 Patriots or Revolution fans who are local is a world of difference to having tourist fans - can the infrastructure handle that particularly public transport which is going to one assumes be used a lot. Are there enough trains etc

and there are so many more teams and games

If you’re Scottish then he’s got to go!
I’d do it if I could.

Why will it be epic? The US is hardly a shining beacon of a desirable place to visit at the moment. You couldn’t pay me to go there and I quite like football. The cringey peace prize by FIFA to Trump is the final straw. I will be boycotting the whole shambles